|Reviews for Summer Fling|
| twerkaholic chapter 10 . 7/1/2013
Ha, I love the story! Lol, yes, I would love to see Sasuke with pink hair. Totally hawtSai is sexy, but super unemotional...kinda like Sasuke!
| Dymin Jay chapter 6 . 1/21/2013
that was so great! I love the expressions they gave them. awesome story :D
| Guest chapter 14 . 9/6/2012
Hey... U got a very Good story here so why did u just give up?... I mean... U should continue the story, finish what u started at least.
| xBitterSweetDreamsx chapter 14 . 3/27/2012
Great story so far, love how you incorporate Sasuke evil side in this fic
| Happily Unique chapter 13 . 7/23/2011
Aww I love it ! You have all of my FAVORITE Pairings here ACK I just love them all and you write them all so well XD Thank you so much for such a good story and i can't wait for the next chapter ! XD XXX
| bri chapter 14 . 5/30/2011
come 0n finish it im really interested now :) im a faithful reader and this really is a good story so continue bye
| Aqua0394 chapter 14 . 9/26/2010
You are taking forever in finishing it please please finish the story it's one of my favorite stories and I want to finish it please please finish it I practically on my knees begging!
| Oyako-sama chapter 14 . 8/24/2010
I really loved this story. :D
| ohgoditsbriony chapter 1 . 8/16/2010
Hello. Firstly, let me assure you that this is definitely NOT a flame; this is just some constructive criticism, if you ever decide to go back through your work and edit it. I aim to help, and sometimes I may seem a bit harsh; I am only going to offer critique on the first chapter, as a basic judgement of whether I would continue reading your fanfiction or not.
This is usually the kind of fanfiction I stay away from—the kind which is riddled with clichés. However, recently I have begun to read more of that fanfiction, as well as having started my own, and so I feel I should offer you some criticism, so that you can improve as all authors wish to. Firstly, the idea itself seems clichéd and, without repeating what has already been done before, I can’t see how you could really improve it; if you include a game of truth or dare at all during this story, then you are probably a lost cause. Due to the fact that I don’t plan on reading any further, I won’t know as to whether my prediction was correct or not.
However, it’s not all bad news. At the moment, the dialogue, despite being corny at times, is relatively interesting and entertaining. While the characters sometimes feel as though you’ve created your own character and just named them after someone from Naruto, at other times they are likeable and in-character. Hinata was well-written throughout most of the first chapter, until the end, where she swore and fainted; this was obviously done for comedic effect but is so out of character for her, it’s unbelievable. It is also strange; I can’t actually see what reason she has to faint and swear, so that doesn’t seem at all clear to me. Overall, the dialogue flows well, and is the best part of your fanfic, so far.
There is very little description. It could be used just to convey her feelings a bit better, or to show what the people and scenery around her looks like. For example, you could rewrite Hinata finally deciding to put Neji back into his place to use more description, like this:
‘Hinata turned around to look at Neji, only to find that her older cousin had already disappeared. She heaved a sigh, pressing her fingers together as she turned to walk back inside. ‘He’s always like this. After five years, I thought we’d gotten over the whole Main Branch thing; but he still hates me. I thought he’d respect me more than that…’
Anger filled her, as she thought of her cousin. ‘You know what? He SHOULD treat me with more respect!’ Filled with newfound resolve, she punched her fist into the sky, Sakura-style, and marched back into the house.
She was going to put Neji back in his place!’
However, this is just an example of something you could do. Overall, I would suggest going back through your work at some point, re-reading it all. You could omit anything which sounds too childish and add in a bit more description. You could try and make it so that Ino and Sakura don’t turn into girly stereotypes too often. I hope my critique hasn’t in anyway hurt your feelings and I apologise if it has. If you need any assistance, or would like to know more about what I have to say, then just send me a PM. Thank you for taking the time to read my review; I hope you consider what I have to say.
| Anonymous chapter 14 . 8/10/2010
I thought you were going to update soon? It's been over a year. Either just say you stopped or update!
| taraching19 chapter 14 . 4/24/2010
OMG! me and meh friend just love your fanfic it's so~,super awwessome! you should update it soon too alot of people would realy like that
| AnimeLover'sInTown chapter 14 . 4/16/2010
What the hell just happened? btw, plz tell me yr not an inoshika fan? i for 1 am an shikatema fan and love the way you made Temari be Shikamru's Boyfriend. Lov d story, plz rite new chap soon k?
| Chibi-Kyuubi-Chan chapter 14 . 10/11/2009
PLEASE FINISH SUMMER FLING!
It was really entertaining,but stopped like half-way...
Its sorta been ages since u last updated...
| As if this was my real name chapter 14 . 9/4/2009
| CoolPickles chapter 14 . 8/15/2009
please! finish the story!