|Reviews for Without Hope|
| Frodo's sister chapter 1 . 8/20/2013
I like this poetry. That is true about hope.
| Dearheart chapter 1 . 7/5/2007
Hmm...this poem isn't BAD; it has a sweet, simple, childlike tone to it, and I kinda like that. However, the rhyme choices are rather obvious and the ending is kinda...abrupt? No, that's not the right word... *ahem* Basically, it feels unfinished; like there was supposed to be more but you never completed it. Does that make sense to you?
Also, I think it's wonderful that you write poems about Jesus (He ROCKS!) but I think you should try and write about other things, too. Use the imagination He gave you to the best of your ability. Poetry can be a beautiful way to tell stories and describe people, places, His creation, your feelings, etc, but if you're not careful it can get repeditive and boring (especially if you always choose same/similar subjects). I recommend you read Spectacles of Grandeur. I don't remember the pen name, but it's a beautiful poem about God's creation and I think you should read it, just to get an example of what I'm talking about.
Okay, I'll shut up now and let you get on with your life. _ Keep writing for His glory and using your imagination! I'm sure He loves it! May "Aslan keep you in His mighty paws".
Dream! Imagine! Create!
PS: Again, PLEASE CHANGE THE SUMMARY! The summary for this one was even worse than the first one! Grammar and spelling, people! WHAT HAPPENED TO GRAMMAR AND SPELLING? (Sorry. But STILL...)
| Nekoes chapter 1 . 7/3/2007
First of all 'With out' should be spelled without in the poem.
Second, the poem has a child like tone to it. If you wanted people to think you were 16,17, the poem is crawling in the other direction.
Lastly, You poem is overall okay. I can't see alot of effort behind it, but it's not all that bad. Maybe you should try free verse?
Definetly keep writing though.
| enchantedwriter72 chapter 1 . 7/2/2007
i am very talented. I am typing, holding a baby, rocking the baby, and feeding the baby all at the same time! this is a nice poem! I like it! See you tonight.