|Reviews for His Destiny|
| Guest chapter 5 . 3/23/2015
Ur fanfic is d best
| UNSC DESTROYER EDESHIMARROW chapter 1 . 2/3/2013
This is so fucking awful! do you you enjoy tortuering your readers?
| lil26jay chapter 6 . 1/2/2012
this has a great storyline, i think it works
| aliestrikehero chapter 3 . 1/3/2011
Even though you are remaking this fic, I need to say that unless he is paired with all the inners minus Moon, it can't be called a harem.
2 girls threesome, 3 foursome, 4 or more is harem.
| RE5 forever chapter 11 . 9/29/2010
Will the paring be the same Naruto/Makato,Naruto/Minako,Naruto/Ami,Naruto/Rei I naruto/harem too bad there is much hope can change that plez also will be M in your next one
| saii45 chapter 11 . 7/16/2010
ooh i like it :)
| Venus914 chapter 4 . 7/13/2010
Pls...no harem stories. I hate it.
| RogueNya chapter 11 . 7/13/2010
Awww drat this was great story, though no clue how Itachi and them arrived.. Not to mention no clue on what bloodline he may have gotten..
Look forward to seeing the new version though.
| lightningblade49 chapter 11 . 7/13/2010
this looks better than the original a sage mode naruto looks better.
| Soma chapter 2 . 7/12/2010
Was the ''time skip: lunch'' really necessary? Its like an hour passing in your fic and the reader would have understood it was lunchtime without it.
| Bobboky chapter 11 . 7/11/2010
| Dimensional Wanderer chapter 10 . 3/12/2010
Are you still going to add more chapters to your Naruto and Sailor Moon crossover? I've been reading this story with alot of interest, and I am hoping that there will be more chapters. Beleive me, I am expecting to read some more.
| serin2 chapter 5 . 2/28/2010
you know that it is possible not to compress an entire third of your battle sequence into a single paragraph, right?
| serin2 chapter 4 . 2/28/2010
Okay, this is a little better then the previous ones. however, you're still rushing things. you ARE putting people personality quirks in, buts that's all.
so here is what you have:
jumbled paragraphs (Much better than first two chapters)
dialoge (Too much)
personality quirks (Done okay on the Naruto end, but you need to work on timing. also just because someone is in a room does not mean they have to speak at all.)
you need more description. granted i have skipped a lot of the first two chapters, but i can tell you are focusing too much on character's interacting with eachother and not enough on the envirnment. (Even the description of the training grounds could use some work.)
No matter how much you say "don't judge a book by it's cover." poeple are going to anyway. go back and fix the first few chapters and less readers will take one look at them and skip to the next story.
| serin2 chapter 2 . 2/28/2010
Same problem as before! have you ever seen those ridiculously sized utensels that couldn't possibly fit in someone's mouth?
that is your story! your rushing everything and clumping your sentences into the biggest paragraphs possible as though you expect us to congradulate you on how much you've done!
split your paragraphs up!
have YOU ever reread your story? its torture!