Reviews for Tiberium Wars
Soldier of the Future chapter 15 . 6/1/2012
Whew, I got a chance to read your amazing story as time passed, and I can say, you never fail to deliver scenes perfectly. I almost feel like I'm actually watching a movie.

Havoc must be the Rambo of GDI that never stays dead (and probably never will) but then, yeah, it's always fun to see him kick some ass while cracking his one-liners.

The one surprise that had me caught off guard was the Black Hand's code. Let's face it, they're the most ruthless troops to have ever served Kane, yet they're actually respectful towards their prisoners and treat them well? Seeing Captain Allen pummel that poor militia (in a brutal manner no less) for his attempted rape of Sandra was just...wow. I think I have some new respect for that pack of pyromaniacs now, lol (the fact they're so frustrating to kill in-game, even for high-tier units, is just how annoying they really are).

Overall, nice chapter and I'll continue to stay tuned.

-Soldier of the Future
CosmoZombie chapter 1 . 6/1/2012
What about Tiberium Alliances? Or is that what you meant? But this is REALL good!
Ganheim chapter 24 . 5/29/2012
"We're in Egypt, Going around in a truck that isn't armed would be more suspicious."

[Points 1]

Not every platoon received stylish callsigns like "Hitman" or "Dragon

[I suppose Toaster isn’t the worst possibility]

couple meters n front

[in]

Nod care dmuch for

[Running spaces?]

but his advisorss had

[advisors]

Its two steps

[It’s]

contribution had still be

[been]

He could see star

[stars? Or is it singular, referring to the Prophet above? Seems a little too close for a dot-like star reference]

He blinked,a nd found

[Running spaces]

felt like it weight

[weighed]

Amaefule got rifle leveled

[got his? Sounds weaker than something more direct like “finally leveled his rifle and…”]

from where his back hit it

[Grammatically there’s nothing wrong with this, but typographically you’ve already used ‘back’ and just stopping at spiderwebbed gives all the impression necessary]

corpses of hose

[those]

riflemen opened fire and instant later

[an]

His body language was indolent, and his tone a hair shy of insubordinate. Parker approved

[Nick would, that and implication is anybody surviving commando training was a cocky bastard]

"Keep this up, Fullerton, and you'll be a Captain soon enough."

"I'll endeavor to fail a bit more, lest that unpleasant scenario happen, Colonel

[An amusing exchange]

or railguns like the 'kids

[Ravenshaw had a railgun…or was that only in multiplayer?]

Needed the impossible done, you sent in a commando. Support optional

[No exaggeration. That was always the part of Tiberian Dawn that I despised – those missions are best done in an RPG, not a strategy game]

took a another gulp

[Outaplace “a”]

As long as you're not an asshat, you'll be fine

[It worked for Captain America]

Its brutal, but

[It’s]

You’ve been presenting an interesting journey. A number more small technical flaws than before, but less than many fics I’ve seen and probably noticeable more because you’ve had so few to start with. The scenes both in combat action and out were good, though I felt that a couple of the combat scenes were a little dry or rough compared to before, like your attention was on something else (like weighing how you wanted to assemble the Alexandria battle), but even then they were still good. The section at the end with Havoc, and earlier the somewhat surprise of him not being the commando that beats down the Nod base was what I considered the most interesting part(s) of the chapter.

Good to see your story still looks sharp. Happy writing.
Hawki chapter 24 . 4/27/2012
-Would Toyota really be absorbed into GDI? I mean, obviously it can work within it, but being a public company, I'm not sure whether GDI would have jurisdiction over it per se.

-Ah, poor Boyd...the human price of micromanagement. ;)

-So, we go from Caprica, to Toaster...yeah, I'm getting more 'Battlestar Galactica' vibes here. 0_0

-"He wasn't surprised it was a woman; neither GDI nor Nod care dmuch for gender these days."

Should be "cared much."

-Interesting to see the Forgotten, but...well, I'll get to that at the end of this review.

-"There were only three variations on the weather around Pyramid Base, Sergeant Colt had come to conclude: clear and hot, sandy and hot, and cloudy and hot."

Lol. Still, that being said, good use of tiberium-meteorology. Also, maybe grasping at straws here, but I got a sense of deja vu in the setting, what with the hot conditions and the chemical threat-reminded me of something you might see out of the Gulf War, using the film ‘Jarhead’ as an example. Was this intentional by any chance?

-“Bullshit, not what I head," Specialist Brown, a vehicle mechanic from the 121st Armored.”

You’re missing a “said” in that sentence.

-Good use of the stealth tank description-it makes sense given Nod’s combat doctrine, how they’re suited to hit and run attacks. Given your author’s note on stealth tank design quite a few chapters ago, I’m guessing you’re a fan of them.

-“Battle Commander Alexander Karrde…”

Could probably cut out “battle commander” here-we know his rank, and the term’s been used repeatedly throughout the chapter. Using his full name is okay, but the rank at this point feels like excessive common noun usage.

-…but his advisorss…

Should be “advisors.”

-Nice logistical description of the chain of command. I think it works with character building as well, showing that Karrde is not only the proverbial micro manager, but probably not much of a people person either, even if his ‘chess pieces’ have faces to him. Guessing that might change by the end of the story for reasons I’ve mentioned before, but either way, you handle his character well.

-And so Havoc’s with Karrde also. In regards to his presence…I think it’s another thing to leave until the end of the review.

-Kind of getting a bit of déjà vu with Karrde and Autumn, namely harkening back to McNeil and Umagon. Make of that what you will.

-Never really thought of the Kodiak as an AWACS replacement, but I think it’s a good analogy.

-And now we have Vipers. As in fighters. As in…yeah, I’ll shut up now. Good scene with the Firehawks regardless.

-I’m guessing the A-17 Orcas are representative of the Orca strike craft from the game, as in, from the support power option. The other variants make sense as well, and I think it was a good representation of a combined arms aerial force.

-General firearms combat was good overall. Also nice intro with Fullerton.

-Good intel piece on commandos. Matches what I’ve seen in other literature.

-All in all, good chapter. It stands apart from the previous one in that while you seem to be (and have expressed as such) writing combat rather than characters, certain characters manage to stand out in such conditions. However, as mentioned, there are two things I’d like to comment on that don’t belong to any one part of this chapter, but are part of a greater whole.

-The first is Havoc. Another reviewer has mentioned about how him tagging along with Karrde is unrealistic and approaching Mary Sue territory, while other reviewers have praised his presence. Right now, I’m kind of on the fence. On one hand, there’s nothing objective to prevent him from being here, as he was active until at least 2069. However, his presence does come across as a bit of an oddity in the ‘Command and Conquer’ character tradition, how every main instalment of each series has introduced a new cast of characters. There are exceptions of course, Kane being the main one and McNeil/Vega being (potential) others, but even in their cases, their second appearences were regulated to a novel and the canceled game ‘Tiberium.’ Havoc has been mentioned in flavour texts before, but hasn’t made an actual appearance since ‘Renegade.’

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with a deviation from the norm in this case. You obviously like the character, and this being your story, you’re entitled to write it as you see fit. However, I am wary that this could get a bit overboard. Havoc is potentially suited to a mentor role, but he doesn’t strike me as the kind of individual who would really have the patiene for it. In the field is fine. But Karrde never really had any problem in Washington, never struck me as incompetent, and yet Havoc is kind of adopting a mentor role for him here. It adds to Havoc’s character in one sense, but it potentially cheapens Karrde’s as a result. The Third Tiberium Wars is ‘their’ story, so to speak, and just as Bilbo had so little a role in ‘The Lord of the Rings’ as opposed to ‘The Hobbit’ for instance, I’d personally be inclined to cast Havoc in the same light.

Anyway, just some thoughts. Now for more.

-The second issue to come to mind is the Forgotten. This is less of an issue than Havoc IMO, but it encapsulates the same essence. You made an excellent point near the start of the story that GDI, Nod and tiberium have always been the three constants in the ‘Tiberian’ series (and Kane I guess), how each instalment has added a new element that was…well, forgotten. The Forgotten, CABAL, the scrin…now the Forgotten are back. As I said, this is less of an issue in that mutants appeared in ‘Tiberium Wars’ regardless, but what’s another issue is the content of ‘Tiberium Alliances’. As vague as the ‘story’ is for the game (and there’s been contradictory information), it does seem that the Forgotten seemed to be part of a three way war with GDI and Nod at some point in/near the TW3 era. I was basically wondering how you intended to incorporate it, if at all.

Anyway, good chapter, just some food for thought here.
Mr. Martin chapter 24 . 4/23/2012
I liked the Hobbes quote by Burke, nice touch.

I couldn't stop laughing with all the stuff with Havoc, he truly is THAT awesome.

Hope the next chapter comes soon.
x Kyuubi z chapter 24 . 4/20/2012
Are you psychic? Because I was just thinking about this fic the other day and you updated it. Still creepy, but a pleasant creepy. Other than that, another great chapter. I'm glad we didn't have to wait a year. Hopefully the next installment can be out sooner rather than later as well. Keep up the great work. You're one of the best combat writers on this site, argueably the best.
Avenger09 chapter 24 . 4/20/2012
Parker: Old School Badass

Commando: New School Badass

Nuff said.

Like what your doing with the forgotten. They deserve a place in Tiberium Wars.
Teutonic Knight 92 chapter 24 . 4/20/2012
I have always like this fic for its realism and attention to detail. Its a great military fic, but I have to tell you I think using Havoc kind of cheapens the story.

It was fine and even hilarious when he shows up in DC, but I thinks its streching belief to have him in Eypt tagging alone with Karrade. Havoc had his moment of glory in Tib War 1 and in my opinion has kinda of become a Mary Sue

The commando lt. could have done everything Havoc did in this story and I think it would have worked out better and establish his reputaion for being a badass for when he rallies the GDI defenders in that Germany city.

I don't think you need him. Anyway thanks for the update I really do enjoy your fic even though I may complain.
DarthNacho chapter 24 . 4/19/2012
This made my day. Awesome. Uh... I'm done now.
stringtheory00 chapter 24 . 4/19/2012
IT HAS RETURNED!

another awesome chapter, hope it won't be too long until the next one
gunslinger01 chapter 24 . 4/19/2012
Spectacular, intense action. Keep it UP!
pacificuser chapter 24 . 4/19/2012
cool! an update! yehey!
S058 chapter 24 . 4/19/2012
Nice chapter, as always Peptuck!

I especially liked the bits with the GDI Commando, always nice seeing those BAMFs shine.
Just a Crazy-Man chapter 24 . 4/19/2012
Nicely done. :)
Soldier of the Future chapter 1 . 4/18/2012
In a website where Command and Conquer fics rarely ever seem to get any recognition or notability in terms of quality, you really changed that notion around. It's a shame there's not a lot of good stories around here based on the series, you really seem to take the cake here.

The writing is extremely well thought out and detailed, and the descriptions seem like as if you're actually there, watching the action unfold. This is especially true when it comes to the battles. Although I haven't read them all yet (just started recently) I'm quite amazed at how they would actually look like on the main screen. Although video game movies are often crap, one can dream right?

Nothing much to say for now, but I'll keep reading whenever I have the time. Like Havoc would say...

"Keep 'em coming!"

-Soldier of the Future
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