|Reviews for The Price of Honor|
| Itachi's apprentice chapter 6 . 11/30/2015
Great story, in the this is really not what I'm used to but still awesome. Now onto the sequel.
| FaBbEr0oZ chapter 6 . 11/19/2014
Awww. Shego's turning over a new leaf for Yori. It's adorable.
And good girl Yori. Grey area isn't bad!
| ArtisticAndrogyny chapter 6 . 7/31/2014
Superb story! I have been looking everywhere for this pairing... I do hope you can write more with them!
| lycan13 chapter 6 . 2/18/2014
Not bad, short and sweet.
| lycan13 chapter 5 . 2/18/2014
I'm staring to find this couple extreamly cute for some reason.
| lycan13 chapter 4 . 2/18/2014
About time. get you ticket, the show's about to begin.
| lycan13 chapter 3 . 2/18/2014
They warmed up to each other pretty quick. I can see why this was for that guys' 'Something Diffrent, Something New' challenge. This is somethign else entierly as far as KP goes. I like it!
| lycan13 chapter 1 . 2/18/2014
Yori working for Dr. Drakken? I'll get the popcorn.
| vasemore chapter 6 . 9/13/2013
Very good light reading I enjoyed this very much
| TempestDash chapter 6 . 10/27/2009
A cute story that piqued my interest from the premise and managed to keep me engaged most of the way. I liked it, and will read the sequel to see where you go with this idea.
The relationship, which I imagine is one of the tent-poles of the story given it was a response to a challenge for an unusual coupling, unfortunately doesn't quite hit my watermark for plausibility, but it does come close.
The story suffers a little from what I like to call the 'OOC Tango.' Characters spontaneously do things that are outside of their normal behavior, then backpedal and rationalize afterward. While this IS a standard mental defense mechanism to avoid cognitive dissonance, the actual motivation for the spontaneous character evolution is unclear.
For instance, one scene has Yori decide to kiss Shego seemingly only because they are in close proximity. Then a later scene has Yori explain, in excruciating length, why she did what she did to the reader and why it makes sense. This ends up feeling like Yori lives her life recklessly and then tries to stitch together a rational narrative afterwards, which runs contrary to all the signs in the show AND in this story that she is orderly, organized, disciplined, and thoughtful.
This isn't the only example, and Shego suffers from it as well. I've seen stories do it before (I, admittedly, do it at times as well) but I think the reason it bothers me more here is that it lessens the impact of what I consider the 'A-Story' of this fic: namely Yori's decision to break from the bonds placed on her by Yamanouchi. That choice was agonizing to her, and it takes a LOT of convincing and uncomfortable situations forcing her to make a decision in order for her to take the first step towards moving away from Yamanouchi. By the end of the story she STILL isn't fully walking away from them, either, she had just set on a path where she can slowly break her ties with the ninja school.
I would say that Yori's decision to become romantically involved with Shego should be at least half as monumental to Yori as leaving Yamanouchi was, and yet it feels like it was tossed carelessly onto the pile of life changes she decided to make. Everything that has happened to Yori in the story points to her becoming more and more of a close friend of Shego, but she spontaneously jumps from 'friend' to 'lover' on a whim without foreshadowing and doesn't even suffer a crisis of faith afterward for her actions. In the end they're even cavalier about their relationship to Ron and Kim which seems to indicate ease and comfort between the two less than a few days after the realization of mutual feelings.
Finally - and this is less of a serious criticism and more of a nitpick that particularly bothers me - but I really dislike any line that goes like this: "Yori decided not to say anymore but her mouth kept going... etc..." It cheapens the character because it implies that he/she has no control over themselves. Which can be fine, but then you can't later go into angst over decisions made by that character because you've already established their whimsical nature. Either a person is whimsical and rationalizes, or they're deliberate and self-aware, but they shouldn't flip flop back and forth. Which isn't to say a deliberate character never says something they later regret, but they at least should have a reason why they felt that *at the time* the action was appropriate.
*Sigh* There's a lot of criticism up there and I'm afraid I've overshadowed the fact that this story *IS* rather good. I like this version of Yori you've created. Apart from my quibbles about the relationship being implausible, the crisis over Yamanouchi and her feelings of confinement seem very genuine, and she deals with them in a believable manner.
Additionally, Shego's nature as a free spirited person who likes to collect and care for 'pets' instead of have friends is very charming and actually somewhat consistent with her characterization. Her backstory about being mindfucked by Hego to do his bidding even gives this a bit of credence, as she would be less inclined to get into mutually dependent relationships with people and instead prefer the master/pet (or sempai/kohai) relationship which affords her more control.
Though that explanations above does raise the question of whether she's really falling for Yori or is she is intuitively figuring out what Yori needs to keep her happy and giving it too her to maintain her dominant role in the master/pet relationship...
Anyway, in the end, I'd recommend this fic, in the least to see a great take on Yori, who often gets marginalized in other works by other authors.
| Etherelemental chapter 6 . 8/19/2009
Well, that's not the way I thought it would end. As it is, even though I'd taken a look to see how many chapters there were in this, I'd started to expect it to start becoming longer somehow. So, it was a bit of a surprise when it ended here. Though, I started to wonder if Sensei is more using the whole brainwashing thing Shego mentioned as a way to find people who really are willing to think for themselves rather than be blindly obedient. And in doing so, find someone who'd be a good candidate to be the successor of the school. But that's just a thought anyway. Though, I'm wondering if Drakken will complain more about Yori's presence or more importantly, what'll happen in the sequel as the summary indicates that Yori's being called back. So, anyway, on to the next fic!
| Etherelemental chapter 5 . 8/19/2009
Well, I'm sure that Kim and Ron will do a little investigating into why Yori's with Drakken, since things like that would more than likely leave some sort of trail, that Wade would be able to pick up on after some searching. Although, I didn't really expect things to develop between Shego and Yori that quickly. Especially with Yori making the first move. Which makes me wonder how Drakken will react if he ever finds out of what's going on between the two. But mostly I'm wondering what Yori's going to decide about Yamanuchi, since that's one big ape in the room that she'll have to deal with sooner or later. Although, I'm wondering if that's what part of the main focus of the sequel to this will be about. Anyway, on to the next chapter!
| Etherelemental chapter 4 . 8/19/2009
I'm wondering if Drakken will share why he was so upset with Yori later on with Shego. As I'm sure Shego will be more than willing to give Drakken a little attention. After all, while she doesn't hold him in high regard, she'd at least know that if she keeps him happy, sort of, then he'll be less likely to be as obnoxious as he has been some of the time. But anyway, that certainly is a sitch that they're in. I had partially expected it to occur on their first assignment, but now is another interesting time as well. And I'm guessing that Kim and Ron won't be expecting any explanation as to why Yori's with Shego and Drakken. So, on to the next chapter!
| Etherelemental chapter 3 . 8/19/2009
Well, that was amusing. Though, I was wondering if Shego was going to try something more. But it certainly was amusing. Especially with a few of the comments that Shego made in Yori's direction to get a rise out of her. Although, I think that Yori should comment sometime that the name 'Sakura' means cherry blossom, and that her name doesn't mean that. But that's just me. Anyway, I didn't expect Drakken to really get upset that they had gotten close, unless it involved with them playing a sort of tag team with throwing mocking comments his way. Anyway, on to the next chapter!
| Etherelemental chapter 2 . 8/19/2009
Yeah, I was certainly amused at the events when they got the 'battery'. Although, I'm wondering what Yori's reaction to Drakken's plan will be. Since I'm sure she probably hasn't been employed, so to speak, with someone like Drakken before. With the world domination plans, I mean. But I'm also partially wondering if you'll have Kim Possible show up it foil the plan or if it'll just fail on it's own. Something that I've just been wondering. Anyway, on to the next chapter!