|Reviews for The Fate Machine|
| Dorryen Golde chapter 2 . 8/22/2010
It wasn't until I read the reviews with confused readers asking whether House or Wilson died that I realized you had not mentioned the survivor's name at all in this chapter. Brilliant!
However, in my mind there's no doubt that it's House. Only House would speak so abrasively (although I suppose considering the extreme circumstances Wilson is a possibility), and I'm sure you have enough insight to realize it's much more meaningful if House was the one that survived despite/because of his sacrifice. Meaningful, shocking, and totally twisted. Awesome, in other words.
Although I definitely appreciate the follow-up chapter, the first chapter was much, much better. I think it's mainly because all the events and emotions were so understated. Things got a little too melodramatic in this chapter, particularly the ending with the whole "ashes over his heart" imagery. I know you were going for pathos, but something more subtly symbolic would've worked better with the rest of the story. The following is a perfect example:
"'No,' he says, not angry at first, not surprised. Just sure, absolutely sure that this is not real. 'No,' he repeats."
I found that heartbreaking. And the very last part: "the red turns to black." Subtle. Excellent.
| Dorryen Golde chapter 1 . 8/22/2010
I love the concept. It's pretty rare to see an original science fiction idea, and because it's so well-written the story is very credible. Everything was narrated in a terse, matter-of-fact tone. The best examples are the two most beautiful subtle lines in the entire chapter:
"And when Wilson steps into the machine and sees him standing there, he is not pleased."
"And the machine calculates accordingly."
WOW. Talk about understatement.
| hollywoodgal chapter 2 . 8/28/2007
wow, very powerful. I like your concept of not letting the reader know who survived. its good to give the reader a little of their imagination in creating who is left. very nice.
| thessaly fuchsia chapter 2 . 8/13/2007
Wow, this story has such an intriguing, fascinating premise! I love the twist with House being the one who survived the machine. I hate fics where my favorite characters die but the dark ending really worked with this story. Really interesting, chilling piece of work here.
| snowrabbitses chapter 2 . 8/13/2007
Absolutely awesome. This fic deserves every compliment it receives both here and on lj.
Such a characteristic move of House; and it's a great way of making us re-evaluate what makes a person 'good'; obviously something quite different from what even House thinks. Or possibly Wilson has more skeletons in his closet than even House knows about.
So unique. loved it.
| RedWaxie-Zero chapter 2 . 8/13/2007
This is an incredibly unusual idea. How'd you come up with it?
Let me guess, House was the one who survived. Right? C'mon, he either had a death wish or just wanted to break the system.
| confusedsarcasm chapter 2 . 8/13/2007
that was a very interesting read. i really liked it. and somehow not knowing who the machine picked at first didn't bother me because the story is just that good-and only in 2 short chapters! cameron losing to an old man. ahaha that was great. good job!
| The Flaming Dragonfly chapter 1 . 8/11/2007
Wow. I had to read it twice before it all hit me, but now I'm just blown away. Such power in so few words.
| chimericanchild chapter 1 . 8/10/2007
Incredibly original plot. But FOREMAN living over Chase? No way! -kicks machine- BeEp BoOp BoP.
| J Daisy chapter 1 . 8/10/2007
This fic has such an incredible concept. I can't believe that Chase lost to Foreman! Although you did say that no one knows what the criteria for staying is. So it could very well be that House lives and Wilson dies. Then wouldn't House feel guilty!
The thing is - if half the people in the world don't exist, wouldn't that dramatically alter the present? For instance, if Cuddy went in the machine and died in the past, then House wouldn't know Wilson because he wouldn't work at PPTH because Cuddy wouldn't have hired him. So maybe you should edit so the people are killed painlessly *in* the machine.
| KayleighBough chapter 1 . 8/10/2007
This is definitly the most interesting concept I've come across in fanfiction. You should remember it for later.
Very, very nice idea.
| Izzbella91 chapter 1 . 8/8/2007
Whoa. This was strange... but good.
I think House would come out- Wilson is somewhat of a pretender.
And Chase would so beat Foreman! Eh. Maybe.
Such an interesting thing, though. I think I may obsess on this for awhile.