|Reviews for Halo: Halos in Space 2: Aliens attack|
| Your name chapter 1 . 7/14/2009
I can't wait to see what happens to Joe Chief. A riveting read!
| Space Monkey chapter 1 . 7/12/2009
"Oww, anywhere but my head! My one weakness!" the helmut human guy said again
| Far Four chapter 1 . 7/2/2009
Brilliance in its purest form, never before have I read such an epic masterpiece.
| lulzuarearetard chapter 1 . 7/2/2009
fucktard it's a WART HOG not a "War Thog"
| dadda chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
| A Decent Human chapter 1 . 5/13/2009
I hope this is not serious. becuase you make me want to shot at his own face of mine and droep my sheilds's
| Doom chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
Oh gods I lol'd. Thanks man, you're hilarious. Keep up the good (?) work.
| glasg0wsmile chapter 1 . 4/30/2009
Egad! I can't believe there isn't a third part to this. I want to know what happened to Joe Chief.
This is seriously unique in so many ways. Lot's of action good. Consider a third part. I've been wondering if Joe Chief made it for some time now. I assume he did, but...
Again, Epic Effing win here.
| Bobby Corwen chapter 1 . 4/27/2009
That was the best and only Halo fan fiction I have EVER EVER READ IN MY WHOLE LIFE!
KEEP UP ALL THE GOOD WORK! I LOVE YOUR WRITING!
METAL GEAR WAS SUPERB.
I swear to god I'm not being sarcastic here!
| lordnegromancer chapter 1 . 3/19/2009
This is so creative! Why would someone nitpick grammar when the idea behind the story is so much fun for anyone who is familiar with Halo? I don't get it.
But... you shall be avenged.
| Shadowdancer21b chapter 1 . 3/15/2009
Why no more? I honestly am interested to learn what happens to Joe Chief and the aliens. This story entertained me and my friends at work. We laughed and laughed.
| Gryphus-OnE chapter 1 . 1/17/2009
Although it has been almost 2 years since you posted this story, there IS a way to improve your English skills. The quickest way (I believe)is to read as MANY English books as you can e.g. Harry Potter (this series jump started my English reading and writing like many other people of the Harry Potter hype), Eragon, or even classics such as Of Mice and Men. Improve your English reading and understanding skills first. Observe how real authors write and organize their stories and words. Once you can start writing grammatically correct sentences, and paragraphs should you then bring your imagination into full swing. *You can ask around for VERY well written stories in to help you improve your English.
| Aloria chapter 1 . 12/6/2008
To be fair, you're actually doing fairly well, given that English isn't your native language.
Here are a few pointers:
in dialogue, when the speaker changes, make a new paragraph.
here's an example:
“Bogies to the left!” one soldier called to his mate.
“We're gonna die!” the other man shouted back.
“Not if I've got any say in it!” Joe Chief snapped.
“We're surrounded, we can't win this!” the second soldier objected.
“Watch.” Inside his helm, Joe Chief smirked.
You can use dialogue to further flesh out your characters, giving them more defined personalities by the way they react to things - that way, we're sad when Soldiers 1 and 2 eat spines. (nom!)
Additionally, with battles, I've found that it's best to stick close to a character and follow their movements as they attack and dodge. Try having the crap beaten out of Joe, make it look like he's about to lose before letting him win. It makes for a gripping story.
You should keep writing.
Don't let these silly people make you quit. If you like writing and are using fanfiction to practice (like I do) then do it! Practice is what helps you get better!
| Anime Moon Dancer chapter 1 . 8/14/2008
Hi i just wnated to tel you that you are favirte author english not my first languge ether and you are inspiraton
i liekd your ran strige fic it wuz very emotionle and i cryed redding it
thank you for your telant
love form veronica
| Demache chapter 1 . 7/11/2008
This is awesome! How can something be so stupid and good at the same time? I love your Halo and Half-Life parody fanfics. I hope you write more someday!
Oh and by the way, he writes this horribly on purpose. Watch Half-Life: Full Life Consequences on YouTube which is his first fanfic turned into a video. Its hilarious!