|Reviews for The Roaring Snake|
| thebetawholived chapter 3 . 4/30/2015
Harry has been presented with several conflicting points-of-view. I can't imagine an 11-year-old making sense out of them without some kind of foundation: a few axioms that he can use as a basis to judge what and who to believe.
This chapter shows the beginning of that process. It will be very interesting to see how it develops.
| thebetawholived chapter 2 . 4/30/2015
Funny how Quirrell's stutter comes and goes. And how very convenient that Malfoy appears shortly after his one-on-one conversation with Harry.
| thebetawholived chapter 1 . 4/30/2015
Interesting beginning: betrayal, manipulation, lots of interesting stuff for Harry, but with a chance for some support as well as to be more than expected.
Looking forward to Diagon Alley!
| Schnuff chapter 1 . 12/5/2014
oppps, just realized that this story ended rather open and that the author doesn't post anymore...well it looks like a nice story but without a proper ending its useless reading more
| Um the Muse chapter 17 . 12/3/2014
Hmm. I'm loving the story so far, but this chapter irked me a bit. Narcissa was very heavy-handed here. I suppose it has to do with her contempt of muggles, but it still strikes me as odd.
This part is not a criticism, but is something that struck me. With Narcissa's ploy, the executive was willing to believe that another bigwig was culpable in a major crime with absolutely no evidence to support it. This character has probably just made his one and only appearance in the story, but it got me thinking.
| at-nightfall chapter 29 . 8/18/2014
Making McGonagall the head of a temporary House of Potter can be seen as a first step of reducing her influence over Hogwarts without her being able to complain. But it would also make her more effective as a teacher and as a deputy head mistress. In canon she doesn't do very well as a Head of House. My assumption is lack of time.
Making a House of Potter permanent should be shut down by the school board and by the teachers for the extra cost and hours.
Thank you for a very different story.
(English being a second language to me, I didn't get all the details; but I am sure some parts of the story line are to complicated to work outside of a novel. ;-)
| at-nightfall chapter 24 . 8/18/2014
In 1748 the industrialization in the UK already started of, so is very unsuitable for the British Magical Creature Covenant. Nearly all of the UK was easily reachable by the Vikings, when they settled Iceland around 900. There was little to no virgin lands in the UK (central Europe) at that time. So should push back that Covenant to between 900 and 1000, or even earlier.
| Priya Ashok chapter 30 . 7/24/2014
Good story. Thank you.
| terrier chapter 6 . 3/8/2014
Elphias Doge - Such sneaky. Much clever. Wow.
| taxzombie chapter 11 . 10/5/2013
Much as I have enjoyed this story I finally realized that this is but a part of a series of stories.
There is too much detail and the clock is moving too slowly for this to be over in one story which is 'only' 139k.
So I popped ahead and checked. There it was, Author's Notes. The sequel is in progress. Problem is the sequel hasn't been touched in two years.
There is nothing that I hate more in fanfiction then to be left hanging, ESPECIALLY when it is a story that deeply interests me.
I have no right to expect or demand that a story be completed by a writer. You do this for your own pleasure and if that pleasure wains then what will be will be. Nor can I blame a writer for my own stupidity. All I had to do was look at the list of your stories and would have realized that Ten was a sequel.
My fault for getting engrossed into this story and basically wasting my time on a 'road' that will suddenly end with a drop into a bottomless gorge.
That said I am going bail out of the car now before I get any further down that road. I've tagged Ten with a Follow and should, someday, you go back to it and finish it AND it is the end of this every interesting journey you started with this story I will return and jump back into that car, put down the top and go for a marvelous ride.
Till then, I wish you well. The ride was grand and the road ahead is enticing, but that drop off currently at the end is pure hell.
| taxzombie chapter 10 . 10/5/2013
Dumbledore's manipulations are many in this chapter. Especially in the office scene.
First the BS he spouted after he admitted that he was Harry's magical guardian (which was it's own manipulation to deter any bad karma that might have brought about) about why he dumped Harry at the Dursleys and never checked on him, and why he still had to go back.
Then giving Harry his father's cloak. First article owned by his parents he has ever received. Big brownie points for that, until Harry gives it the fish eye it deserves. Seeing as Dumbledore said for Harry to keep it on him at all times, that wouldn't be because of a tracking spell on the cloak hmmm?
"Do you mean the Malfoys?"
"Lucius Malfoy was never convicted as a Death Eater, so I should not answer your question perhaps. However, between ourselves, they are one of the several families you should be wary of. But they are not the only ones, nor the most dangerous."
Not to mention the 'beware, even in the castle, especially of the Malfoy's' line he threw out. The only reason I can see Dumbledore not liking the Malfoy's is because they don't work for him.
That he gave Harry the photo album instead of Hagrid comes across to me as him trying to score more brownie points with Harry, same with the little bit of info he gave out about his parents. Though I can't help but wonder if he didn't screw up a little bit when he mentioned that Harry's father was rich. Wealth might allow Harry more freedom, provided that is, he can access it somehow.
To me the biggest and nastiest manipulation was the bit about Quidditich, allowing Harry to try out, AND providing him with a broom. If Harry accepts such blatant favoritism it could/would lead to him being even more isolated from other students who would rightly not appreciate it. Thus giving Dumbledore a better chance to move in his 'creatures' as Harry's friends.
Frankly that office scene made me feel ill. I do hope that you have Harry seeing through the disgusting actions of the MOB.
| taxzombie chapter 8 . 10/5/2013
Quite the interesting tale you have here.
Very detailed, or perhaps deep might be a better way to put it.
It seems to me that you've given Harry an 'old soul' or at least an 'older soul' considering the amount of analyzing and planning he appears to be doing considering he is only biologically eleven years old. But seeing as you are not writing him as a beaten down child thanks to the 'kind' ministrations of the Dursleys he would have to be one that was able to evaluate things and plan.
I truly appreciate that you have more then two sides to this story and that even the 'bad' side is capable of doing something beneficial to Harry. Voldemort especially is interesting, what with him telling Quirrell to train Harry.
I thank you for posting it.
| janefanatic chapter 3 . 9/16/2013
Finally! Someone gives Harry instructions for getting on the platform!
| Eldersprig chapter 30 . 7/24/2013
your 11 years old are scary smart. and your "evil" headmaster is a sociopath. What is everyone after? The Dark are trying to preserve their way of life (as they see it) and Riddle is for power, so what is Bumblebee after? Power again? Grrrrr. Seriously well written "evil" Dumbledore. Thanks.
| Eldersprig chapter 26 . 7/24/2013
"the making of the Philosopher's Stone is an utterly evil and brutal process." huh? really? If alchemy is a spiritual process and the philosopher's stone is the high point of it, how can it be evil?