Reviews for Dawn and May Make Their Moves
Guest chapter 1 . 5/22
Gary says ashy-boy not may
Guest chapter 1 . 4/10
Horry shet
Anonymous chapter 1 . 2/23
C'mon, you did great! But you know what I would recommend? Read other fanfics and improve the naughty scene. Once again, that was great!
Anthony chapter 1 . 1/16
Holy mother of god that was amazing
Guest chapter 1 . 1/4
You should have another one were they have a threesome
K.T.S chapter 1 . 11/5/2014
Mak mor PLZ!
Awesome chapter 1 . 8/14/2014
Very good and funny story so far! I think May wants to ba a little more than friends, same goes for dawn

( it would be funny if you made it so ash runs into misty later)
Guest chapter 1 . 8/8/2014
...o...m...g.

I LOVED IT
Guest chapter 1 . 7/16/2014
Good job man good one I addedit to my favorite how about u. And serena and cythina
Swag chapter 1 . 7/6/2014
fuck
Selke chapter 1 . 6/11/2014
You, my good sir, ARE A LIER, THAT CANT BE YOUR FIRST LEMON! If it is, then your a natural. Keep writing good lemons and you might become as famous as MewLover54 (fanfiction writer, check him out). Keep up the good work

From,
Selke, champion of the rock king

P.s. to understand the rock king thing read critical conditions by MewLover54
Eonic Wolverine chapter 1 . 6/2/2014
Dirty, quick, and fulll of action. its a shame though that there wasnt a threesome. 8/10
H chapter 1 . 5/6/2014
Men...
Guest chapter 1 . 4/7/2014
story felt kinda rushed, seemed like you wanted to get to the lemon scenes as quick as possible.
Guest chapter 1 . 4/7/2014
why would Johto remind Ash of May? She's from Hoenn. Also, this felt rushed, like you were just trying to get to the lemon scenes as quick as possible.
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