|Reviews for Luna's Apparitions|
| excessivelyperky chapter 1 . 12/31/2009
What a lovely story. I do love Luna, and I think Flitwick was out of his mind to let her be persecuted the way she was (then again, McGonagall's always been really hard on Neville, while Sluggy apparently never raised a finger to help Student!Snape. Both Sprout and Snape apparently never let there be an outcast in their houses, as far as I can tell).
Anyway, nicely done!
| RozaHathoway chapter 1 . 12/21/2009
aw! luna and harry would be such an awesome couple!
| realfanficts chapter 1 . 8/21/2007
This was an absolutely adorable little ficlet!
| APRIL26 chapter 1 . 8/17/2007
that was a sweet story. really wasn't expecting a ballroom to appear but it was sweet nonetheless.
| jrkgirlrox chapter 1 . 8/17/2007
this is a really orginal story plot and very well written good job:)
| S. T. Nickolian chapter 1 . 8/17/2007
Aww... I love it! It's sweet and the idea of memories instead of ghosts is really neat. Great job! *Fav* XD
| MidnightBlue88 chapter 1 . 8/16/2007
Well, I do have a few suggestions, though in my experience when a fic feels "off", you might have to experiment a bit and twist things around until it feels complete. Maybe some of my suggestions will help, but maybe not. Here's hoping. :)
First, I would suggest filling out the first scene so that we get a better picture of how the group interacts, why they're in the library in the first place, what their surroundings are like, etc. Take more time to set up the story instead of diving right in. (This is always a problm for me as well, knowing when to get to the crux of the story and when to add more build-up.)
I would also add a bit more action to the ballroom scene to give the story a "point". Right now, it's a nice scene, but I think it could benefit from a more obvious climax, since right now it just kind of ends without getting us too invested in the story.
Also, Harry's observations about Luna in the final paragraph are a bit stark. Maybe if they were not so overtly romantic and were a bit more subtle (or if you shifted the romantic stuff to the dance scene), it would feel more natural.
But even with those suggestions, it was a lovely idea. I adore Luna, and I like to think that Harry does, too. :) Good work.
| alix33 chapter 1 . 8/16/2007
Now the six will have to ask prof. Lupin (aka Moony) how they can add stuff that the Maraduers did not know about to the Marauder's Map, because this ballroom needs to be on there!
| ProfessoraDumbledora chapter 1 . 8/16/2007
A ballroom! What a clever idea! One would expect a ballroom in such a grand old castle. I loved your story. It was very sweet.