|Reviews for Rapture of the Innocent|
| FPStothemaximum chapter 14 . 9/11
TL;DR: It still contains underdeveloped characters and numerous Gary Stu moments from the protagonist but it doesn't have any of the unintentionally hilarious moments from the second instalment. 3/10.
And the series ends with a resounding whimper. I liked this about as much as the first, and by that I mean not very much. It's not cringe-inducing enough to be funny, nor is it well written enough to be entertaining. Let's start with the bad stuff, shall we?
The familiars are still here, and more prevalent than ever. I just think having multiple animals wrapped around you at all times makes you look a bit stupid. The opening is terrible, and it just consists of Narcissa and Lucius explaining the prophecy to Aidan as if he were a toddler. Also, Narcissa and Lucius are against Voldemort, even though in canon they were clearly supporters of him, which annoyed me to no end. Aidan also mentions he learnt French from Fleur, even though I found no mention of her in the previous instalment, which was a bit odd. Unfortunately, the supporting characters are just pieces of cardboard that you are supposed to feel for, but I'm sorry, I just can't. If a character gets one line dedicated to them earlier, do you think I'm going to care if they die or not? No, of course not. Aidan's Gary Stu-ness is also present in this iteration, as he is a "good leader", even though he has never lead anyone before. There's also a lot more nit picks I want to make, these are: the name "The Brotherhood of Orion" being the most awful name in existence, the fact that Aidan has "stopped holding back", even though he already did before and the Potters grovelling at Aidan's feet even though they already did this at the end of First Year to no avail. There's also more issues I have with this story, like the ending, which was downright awful and offered basically no closure to the story.
The positives are unfortunately few and far between. The spelling and grammar have been improved from the previous instalment, though not by much. The Battle of Hogwarts was decent if a bit short and the final duel between Aidan and Voldemort was well written. Also, James Potter's comeuppance was the only satisfying part of the ending. Draco and Adrian's banter and brotherly relationship was much more believable than before, and I'm so glad. And Aidan and Cedric's cringe-inducing relationship was kept to an absolute minimum, which I liked.
However, this does not save this from being very close to being absolutely awful, and I give this instalment of the Innocents Trilogy a 3/10.
| Calmzone1 chapter 14 . 11/4/2015
That would actually be a really cool idea, Voldemort seeing what he has done to society and being challenged to help fix it.
| daithi4377 chapter 14 . 3/12/2014
I don't know what to think about that maybe if another sequel comes up it will make sense but right now that punishment was sort of a let down.
| daithi4377 chapter 13 . 3/12/2014
That is actually a unique and perfect fight. He didn't do the usual to the death fight. He just took the evil away so now he can be punished with no consequences to the rest of the world.
| daithi4377 chapter 12 . 3/12/2014
Hard fought fight,
| daithi4377 chapter 11 . 3/12/2014
Why have the order there its notblike they would listen as shown but molly and James. I love the way he put Aiden down as spoiled and not worth following. He beat dumbledick fair and square publicly.
| daithi4377 chapter 10 . 3/12/2014
I'm surprised he conceded defeat. Scary part was Aiden was only using half his power to do it.
| daithi4377 chapter 9 . 3/12/2014
I think dumbles bit off more than he can chew this time.
| daithi4377 chapter 8 . 3/12/2014
Innocent my ass Draco is going to be one embarrassed
| daithi4377 chapter 5 . 3/12/2014
Ex brother or not I'm not sure I would trust Diarmid. He could be a plan from the bee or his parents, cause really inappropriate whole school the only person he could think of was the boy his family threw away. Seems just a bit to convenient to me.
| daithi4377 chapter 4 . 3/12/2014
Too much pressure on one so young. The fact that can handle it doesn't make it right. Also the fact that he is worried and hates the fact that those that will stand with him will encounter pain and may even die show that he is the correct choice. Dumbledork doesn't care who or how much pain dealt or even dies as long as he gets the glory and Voldemort deals in constant pain and death shows even more why Aiden was chosen for this task to save the wizarding world.
| daithi4377 chapter 1 . 3/12/2014
There are times when prophecies really sick lol
| Sscacred chapter 14 . 3/4/2014
THIS IS THE BEST FANFICTION I EVER READ !
| rowenasheir chapter 8 . 9/13/2013
Watchout humanity vs humility!
| Haruchan-chan chapter 14 . 8/11/2013
Cool. Weird ending, but cool.