|Reviews for A New beginning|
| vivien.gorner chapter 1 . 4/7
Oh... I was so wrong in my last review... French form of Francisco is François, of course. Sorry for that. The most amazing thing is, I think, that Hannibal teaches an American young girl how to fight. With a harpy knife. I have one of those knives, and they are... Hm.. I just love them. And when I first watched "Hannibal" and saw that he had a harpy too, I loved it even more.
and once again, I don't speak (or write, for that matter) English very well, so... APOLOGIES!
| vivien.gorner chapter 26 . 3/7
Hello! I re-read chapter 26 and I just wanted to say: there aren't any coyotes in France. Ferrets, foxes, badgers, but no coyotes. In fact, you won't be able to find those anywhere in western Europe. And, in chapter... I think it was 24 or 25... Francisco is an Italian name. The French form of it would be, I think, Frances.
again, English is not my first language, I am German and live near France, and this is NO FLAMES!
| vivien.gorner chapter 30 . 2/24
Now I've finished chapter 30 or whatever chapter it is, and... Please, don't stop writing. I would fall to the ground dead if you would. Hannibal is soooooo OOC, but in a great way. And sorry, English is not my first language and I can't write it very well. (I think.)
| vivien.gorner chapter 10 . 2/23
I love him. Since I was eleven years old. I haven't read the whole ff yet, and I don't know what his intentions are, but... I am fascinated by this man. Others dream of ponies and clowns and fantasy worlds, I dream of conversations with the good doctor.
| vivien.gorner chapter 2 . 2/23
I have only read chapter one, but I already like it. And, I know it sound stupid and nerdy and whatever, but when I read your name, I had an idea for a Lost/VMars Crossover... I am creepy... But thanks for inspiring me!
| oneblacksheep chapter 1 . 8/12/2013
Please update. This story is vital to me
| oneblacksheep chapter 29 . 8/8/2013
Please update. Please oh please oh please. I need this story in my life, please update. ;_ ;
| oneblacksheep chapter 30 . 8/3/2013
Please oh please update
| sandy.morganlopez chapter 1 . 7/14/2013
I'm wonderfully on edge waiting to see where you go with this...I'm hoping that IF Lector is going to eventually leave Gabby, that they at least have a few intense encounters that either come VERY close to intimate or ARE intimate. I'm not a writer at all (I am very much a grammar Nazi but I am so excited to get to the intense interactions that my writing is chopping and rushed :( ) , but I didn't think it would hurt to share an idea with you that you could run with and improve on-or disregard as you will. lol It was because of YOUR writing in this story that I pictured another 'training session' where her legs are around his wait and he slams her against the wall and their feelings break through and kiss...or a scene where he spins her around where he is against her back and smells her neck, then bites her shoulder hard enough to JUST draw blood. I think it would suit them both as he has such a dark side and she seems so drawn to him. I hope I didn't offend you or irritate you with these suggestions. I've never made any like this before but I really enjoyed your writing and as I said, I have 'ideas' but I don't have the 'flow' to pursue the writing on my own. I have absolutely NO problem with you using or ignoring anything I've tossed your way. Thanks for 'listening'. :)
| sandy.morganlopez chapter 30 . 7/13/2013
OK...I'm DYING to see how this plays out...I think your writing is fantastic and I've loved this story...PLEASE don't wait too long to post more! :)))
| sandy.morganlopez chapter 18 . 7/13/2013
I'm already sad thinking that I'm about 2/3 of the way done...:(((
| sandy.morganlopez chapter 15 . 7/13/2013
Wow...I absolutely LOVED it! I loved the descriptions of the activities, the interaction between the characters and ESPECIALLY how Gabrielle handled the horrid Dr. Tanner! Can't wait to keep reading and see how things develop. :)
| Rmeyer90 chapter 30 . 7/1/2013
I saw an update and thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. Turns out they werent. I went back and reread the whole story before i got to the new chapter. Finally read the new chapter and all i gotta say is my god it was great. Cant wait for the next one
| No Mercy chapter 2 . 6/25/2013
I feel like I'm being trolled. I read all these nice comments, and then I begin read the actual story (although to be fair my expectations weren't too high when I saw 'Gabrielle' mentioned over and over and no Clarice). Clearly this fandom is either full of fools or everyone is too nice. I'm going to do you a favor and be brutally honest about it, because that is what will help you become a better writer, not patting you on the back for nonsense.
Chockful of cliches left and right, this starts off incredibly cheesy. The alcoholic father has been overdone to a ridiculous degree. A teenage main character that is unrelated to prior canon, and making her the main character no less, is another obvious red flag that you're headed to Mary Sue territory.
Luckily i see that this was written largely years ago, so I can blame the self-insertion and obvious Mary Sue qualities of your OC on your youthful years. But the surname 'Helfire'? Really? Why don't you just go the whole nine yards and name her Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way?
This isn't my attempt at being mean and spiteful, this is honest criticism. 99.999% of the time OCs are usually unnecessary and poorly written, yours being part of that percentage. At least you don't have completely atrocious grammar, but I suggest trying to get into the characters heads more by actually writing them rather than deciding to skip it and go with an entirely original one you made up to shove into the universe, and frankly it's incredibly distracting to make them the focus. Why not write your own original story then instead of fanfiction? And Clarice is a difficult character to write, true, but I find your excuse on the bottom to be a lame one and a justification for writing an OC.
Also, from what I read your characterization of Dr. Lecter is incredibly out of character. He is a serial killer, not a social worker.
Don't stop writing because someone doesn't like your work/thinks it sucks, but consider the actual criticism noted in your reviews. I know they are too few and too far between, but taking them into consideration will help tremendously. I'd also suggest reading other fanfictions on here that have gotten some favorable reviews that DO NOT involve OCs, as well as revisiting the actual books themselves to get a feel of the characters' motivations and attitudes, as well as how they interact with other characters in the world that Thomas Harris spun.
I hope this helps. And please, do not take this harshly. It is just the internet.
| LabyFan23 chapter 30 . 6/25/2013
Please update again soon! I cannot wait for more! :)