|Reviews for Synaesthesia|
| Darknightdestiny chapter 1 . 10/6/2007
Nines! I'm sorry I didn't review this earlier. Been hiding from the internet lately, fandom especially. Couldn't say why, other than my son is much happier the more time I spend on him. That, and Joe thinks I love my computer more than I do him. But I've been meaning to get back with you!
I really felt Lucrecia's sense of loss here. I remember you mentioned that Grim got a death a bit too glittery for someone of his stature, and I concur. The way you make it seem reminds me of drowning. Darkness and screaming, tearing flesh and agony, and then just being lost—lost and helpless.
Sounds like hell, to be blunt. And that's not a euphemism.
And then waiting, with nothing to be done. That must have been the worst of it.
I noted the order you chose for the next section. Instead of inserting a sound effect or saying she was "jolted from her reverie" (I wonder how many times I've seen that in fanfiction?), you drew her out of it slowly. Already she's in the softer, quiet atmosphere of an office. The switchboard tentacles made me grin like an idiot, because the first thing that popped into my head was Jenova foreshadowing. Your description of the office was also lovely. I wish I had a room that looked that way.
Pathetic fallacy—I can see how easy it would be for her to slip back to that day, with a storm beginning to approach. Hm, mayhaps that is also foreshadowing?
You know I'm not crazy about Lucrecia—I actually dislike her more for what she did than the way she is—but I'm looking forward to seeing how you portray her. She's self-conscious here, which is something I would have expected from her—it's not overabundant, but the way she takes note of her own posture and behavior in the waiting room makes me think that she's either worried about making a bad impression, or used to schooling herself before interviews. Either way, it's an interesting trademark.
Next time, we get to see her interact with people. Goody. :)
| motchi chapter 1 . 9/14/2007
Oh, Nin, it's so good to see you writing again.
This was a short little bit-more of a teaser, really-but it was effective. I don't care for Lucrecia, as you know, but I think I like her here. She doesn't sound like a Mary Sue, she sounds like a struggling, determined woman-and those are the ones I like to see, frankly.
And your prose is so matter-of-fact, but also, um, pretty. I mean, I like the cadence and flow, and many of the sentences stood out as being poetic, despite their subject-"Six months were enough to have bled the colour from the memory of waking up in a hospital bed, with tubes attached everywhere.""Long enough to not get her arms tangled up in the rubbery tentacles of the switchboard."
I don't think I'm making much sense, but I just woke up. I wanted to review before the day got away from me, but I'll confess to a slight film still being over my eyes. I hope you don't mind! And I hope you come back to this. Maybe those boring lecture sessions will lead to a Chapter One?
| Kysic chapter 1 . 9/13/2007
Oh my gosh! You finially created another FFVII fanfic. I knew I should of put you on my favorite author's list, but I figured you wouldn't publish a fanfic for a while.
Once again, you're writing is smooth. I haven't spotted a single spelling or grammer mistakes. Words are rounded pretty well. A little suspense even came with it. Is there anything you can't do?
I'm sorry I didn't find this fanfic sooner. I haven't been on the site that much for a while. I plan on reviewing more now. Anyway, I can't believe this story hasn't gotten a single review yet! You're a excellant writer so you should be flooded with reviews.
You're lucky you can write so darn well. I still need a lot of work. My fanfics are nothing compared to your's. Maybe once I get a computer for my own room, and won't have to use the one in the kitchen, I can concentrate better.
I may not be a Lucrecia hater, but I hope she has reasonable reasons in your fanfic Something Borrowed. It's not like I'm going to stop reading your story if she doesn't. I'm only saying stuff, so don't worry.
Wow, I haven't written a review THAT long in ages. Please update soon.