|Reviews for A Friend In Darkness|
| Slayer chapter 21 . 3/19
what Enrique said sounds more like an euphemism to say that he is a seller, the same with Dr. Director, just because Grimm gives you information about villains and does things that Kim does not mean that I said it free, and this goes beyond rivalry .
In conclusion, everyone at Riddleton is all sold and kisses butts of Grimm
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 40 . 1/16
Did you mention that in this story that the big bear had chosen Kim with his agent, did she already do the job he wanted her to do or are you preparing him for All Things Probable 4?
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 22 . 12/21/2019
Grimm said that he would beat Kim if she decided to take the money to help Monique, but the reality is that he also failed in that, and that he and Ron gave Kim the same advice, the difference is that Grimm is a person who uses the money to "help others" just to do it and look good with others, and Ron's advice is very different because he submits to do with the heart because it is the right thing and not to look good with the rest.
Because if we put it this way, if Kim had handed Monique the money, who is a person who thinks with her head and not with her eyes, would reject it without hesitation, she may have serious economic problems, but she would remain humble and would not be asking for alms; as is the case of Grimm's best friend, that he was there and is asking for alms and that argument of saying that others live their lives as they want is a euphemism to say "as long as I keep giving money when I need it, it's fine for me"; that something similar with Betty Director that in her case would be something like: "As long as you continue helping me catch the villains, I will tolerate anything that even the altercation Zorpox does."
Do I have reason in that?
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 42 . 12/8/2019
I have seen that many KP fans say that he stayed with Ron for being in the rebound (whatever that means, he could explain it to me), but in my case I do not see it that way, because she went to where he should have always gone, but If that was the case here, then you did a very good job on how she defeated her demons (I think you weren't the only one who used that concept) and that she saw Ron as a man and accept their relationship as real.
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 13 . 12/1/2019
You said it yourself, Grimm has the inability to know how to really HELP people; first: when it comes to making alliances with your enemies always using their head games (which is more frustrating), second: when it comes to encouraging their friends (if guys like Grimm can be considered friends) then He always uses money or his head games, one of the things I hope for Grimm is that he knows what it is to help people the right way.
P.S: the other is that I know what it is to be on the other side of the head games, I hope you can include it in the future chapters of All Things Probable IV: Graduation
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 32 . 10/7/2019
when he replied that Grimm achieved his goal of ending Team Possible (at some point) he was about to take the final blow, only for Rhonda to stop him (somehow, because otherwise he would only prove how ungrateful she would be ) and Grimm decides to "postpone" that and in All Things Probable IV: Graduation, he still wants to finish them.
When the invasion begins he finally realizes what would have happened if the other villains (whether competent or not) had achieved their objectives and he would be the main responsible, and his father realizes that. From there I want to tell Grimm that "you didn't think about the slight pro-ba-bi-li-ty that the villains would have succeeded in their plans."
PD. I await the next update of All Things Probable IV, something tells me that he will have a seat in the front row to see the Ultimate Monkey Master rise.
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 31 . 10/7/2019
Answering your question of which team won ... Well it would be that everyone with the exception of the bastard Grimm Probable, because:
The reasons why they do what they do: although everyone has their own reasons in the case of the possible team they never did it for fame or for having some recognition, but somehow the probable team (Grimm) tries to find some kind of recognition even if their work is always in the shadows, such as the "donations" or the "help" they make with their classmates or friends, although this is when Kim said that as Grimm treats his friends, well I it can be from my point of view and is buying them; something that neither Kim nor Ron would ever do to theirs, because basically you think that with a few thousand gifts given to your friends in your hand you will be the difference, because being like this anyone can be called a hero, because I believe that his supposed friends then I think they are very desperate to accept this money or the problem they are going through to accept it (not to mention that they are a few kisses, especially Dr. Director ... I can't believe that even her); Well, if Kim had done that with Monique, the latter would have rejected it quickly ... but Ron was the one who suggested that he donate it anonymously.
Another point is trust: although in "The Return of Zorpox" this issue was treated so well, after that events trust among Team Possible members was improving on the other hand in Team Probable, when Rhonda got her power of the bear, Grimm and Jade secretly agreed to exploit their powers to the limit just to kill Kim and Ron, in my opinion that is worse than putting a tracking chip without their consent, of course I will not say that when Kim did it with Ron was correct, but in the end she was able to redeem herself from that and that it doesn't take long to recognize her mistakes. And this is where I say again that maybe Kim is not perfect, but he has proven himself to be a better person than Bastard Grimm Likely will ever be.
Correct me if I am wrong or have something against or in favor. Maybe and maybe there is still hope for Grimm
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 41 . 9/14/2019
Is it my business or do all villains have to fix things between Kim and Ron?
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 43 . 8/2/2019
Sr Slyrr, when you can upload the next chapter of All Things Probable IV: Graduation?
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 39 . 6/16/2019
I must say that you did a very good job to do the most canon, except in the part of the break between Kim and Ron that you had to break the canon, but you still knew how to fix it, I hope that a future can write the final battle between the team Possible and the team Probable in which it finds a clear indisputable winner
| Danilinho Ramrez chapter 38 . 6/16/2019
what can I say..
in this chapter it can be said with certainty that Kim ended his relationship with Ron believing he was better without her, that he deserved someone as devoted as him, when in fact it is that both need each other.
And in general you can see that Kim and Ron have grown a lot and that as incredible as Rhonda does, she unlike Grimm does not try to attack them in her current situation, not after what Ron did to her, it seems that Grimm is still a Patan, and he has a long way to go.
Another point (and this is a personal opinion, I do not know if someone agrees with me) is that maybe Kim is not perfect, like Ron, but they have proven to be better people than Grimm Probable will ever be
| Guest chapter 43 . 6/27/2018
Wtf so long
| Mgman27 chapter 43 . 12/6/2017
I might be a little late here (10 Yearsbut I absolutely loved this story. I’m so glad I started from the beginning of this series. Great job, wish I could have read it sooner.
| Luke Danger chapter 21 . 6/18/2017
“'Bah weep graaagnah wheep ni ni bong!'” What was that; the Hypocrite’s Mandalorian, or something from Return to Ios? :D
All in all a very good chapter – I have to say, you were right. Kim did a lot better in Riddleton High than I remembered her doing. I think it was moments like Grimm saying “hey I didn’t get all weird about your school” (which, to be fair, has some meta reasons behind it) and the stumbling over the riddles (which I’m with Kim about – absolutely stupid and counterproductive from a schedule POV) more than her actually figuring them out fairly quickly as she does. If anything, I’d say Kim earned her progress in Riddleton a heck of a lot more than Grimm did in Middleton given he got the cheat sheet.
You continued the excellent trend of Riddleton being similar but different, as befits the theme with Team Probable. Yes a lot of them are many ways gender flips, but there’s the key differences. Darken has a ruthless iron fist with some genuine cruelty (could you imagine Barkin calling someone and making the /class/ call them “Miss Unknown”?), Felicia having a metal hand (“How many times have you used that line?” “And it’s still fresh!”), Cousin Mary going to the same school as Grimm, Donnie actually having a point about his rival, and so on. Wonder how long until they realize Grimm lied about Rhonda’s whereabouts?
Heck, the best part about this was probably the cheer squad, if only because it showed why Kim should have a lot more in her corner – she’s a leader (something she earned by experience) and this is also something she’s good at. It was great to have that really pay off here. Now to see if Kim’s leadership (or Grimm's lack of it causing his jealousy) factors in more – I’m hoping to be pleasantly surprised.
Which led to a confirmation of something that I had thought for a while – that Grimm hated Kim so much because of the end of ATP. I had guessed it for a long time, but it was great to see it confirmed – or maybe reaffirmed if I just forgot that bit. That really would have to grind Grimm’s gears because of the narrative he had built for himself that Kim somehow had a cheat sheet while he had to “work” for it. Hence his obsessive mind games - and Monique finally getting to drop a massive burn on him. That was a much needed sight given what it came after.
Which led to the whole BS involving GJ apparently being in cahoots with Grimm’s “leeway”. Um, okay, did Kim have too many allies or something, because if so I missed the reason to take an even bigger shot at one of her best allies. GJ not being able to move against Grimm because of the US being able to create complications that would hurt the organization? That makes some sense given GJ’s global range – they can’t irritate backing nations. Wanting to warn Kim off revealing Riddleton? Again makes sense (though why Black Ops apparently doesn’t care about Kim’s actions and only being nice because of Doctor Director seems odd – they have to realize who they’re protecting, right? Maybe it’s just how it was phrased)
But being in on it or even depending on Grimm’s intel? Especially since the given examples… why is he so special? I mean, General Probable claims that Kim is replaceable with any of his rifle squads. Okay, let’s play with the given examples and point out why that applies to Grimm.
The Transducer – um, Hench was selling that as close to open market as you can get without a billboard in NYC. Considering the jokes about how thoroughly the alphabet soup infiltrated militias, you’d think that any of them would have a dozen or more “villains” created to act as a cover to get access to such events since they’re pretty widely known amongst the villains.
Big Daddy Brotherson – why would Grimm need to tell BDB about Duff? Duff went to him to buy the fertilizer, why was Grimm needed for that? And if he was, why did they have to go to Brotherson at all to get it? I mean, the scene was supposed to be Kim managing to get the info from him, not “we already have it let’s just jump through another hoop”.
Which I guess leads me to asking about Riddleton’s security – I’m actually confused. On one hand, Kim can’t dare touch it lest all sorts of nasty stuff happen. On the other… Team Go went after Cousin Mary due to Grimm’s battle suit (why?), yet she goes to Riddleton High. How did Team Go get involved since they’re mostly local to their home city? And if it is so secret to the point the military is using covers to import the supplies they can’t produce locally, even if illegal immigrants did happen to stumble into the town why would they be let back in after going through the legal channels? I get the feeling that Riddleton’s security is as two faced as Grimm is, mostly to Kim’s detriment. Which leads to the undead horse I’ve reduced to ectoplasm several times over by now.
Speaking of that, while Enrique’s story was interesting and I’m not faulting him for trying to help Grimm because (somehow?) the two are friends so I don’t blame him for wanting to defend him, it really came off as “See how Grimm is so supportive of our immigration laws? Ignore the rest he violates!” with any attempt to point out the hypocrisy brushed off. I dunno, that rubbed me the wrong way.
But considering how great you do things like Monique’s financial issues and how it highlights great parts of both Kim and Monique’s character (Kim, despite not really being of a set up to handle such, still wants to help if she could, while Monique knows that this is outside Kim’s line of help so tries to not bother her with it), or the fireflies, that is probably why things like that put me on such a hair trigger. You do really great character work, so when certain things drop it’s that much worse, unlike something that’d be more persistently bad.
Jade and Wade’s segment was probably the best of the characterization work in the chapter. It was the lofty ivory tower in a glorious nutshell. Aggressive personalities eager to prove themselves better than their peers, criticizing the other’s work even if it is a valid alternate approach to try and make theirs seem superior - yet the answer was a mere “2”. As a Mechanical Engineering student, I know the feeling of something so complex yet the answer seems so simple. It really was some of the best characterization you could’ve done for both of them, and really hammers home how their peers are few. There was a reason Wade got so twitchy when Rufus got brain boosted past him.
And of course, Ron and Rhonda. It’s great that you actually have them figure out how to piece the veil first, but also everyone having the presence of mind. Ron knows that since they don’t know a way out, reassure their team mates. Monique realizes what they have may not last, so get as much as she can while she’s there (and a great way to phrase it “texting with fireflies” :D ), then Kim pieces together what Rufus meant way back in Wade’s lab. Capping it off, Grimm showing just how badly he feels entitled to certain things. As I’ve said before, he and Maze are a lot more alike than they realize…
Anyways, other than the usual reduced-to-glue undead horse, feeling like the writing tries to act as if Kim’s supposed to be a paladin (not sure if to write it down as “Kim has the self awareness to feel guilt” or “way too high a standard is being applied” to things like Grimm interacting with Mary), and the stuff with GJ, this really was a great chapter that took full advantage of the opportunity Riddleton provided to do something different, and a chance for some things to really shine like Kim’s leadership and cheerleading.
| Luke Danger chapter 20 . 4/23/2017
'Skin mags and drug paraphernalia? I'm a villain - not a pervert or a junkie.' Grimm could have fooled me after staring at the cheer squad from behind bleachers… :D
Anyways, this chapter… reviewing it was a long time coming, mostly because in all it feels like someone looked at Leigh Gallity, thought “Kim wasn’t broken down enough from that and Grimm needs more”, and wrote it for that. I mean, it just comes off as a chapter designed to say “Grimm is fricken awesome, Kim’s just a dime-a-dozen heroine”. Which is basically what General Probable said. So this may be a bit… ranty.
And speaking of him, here’s my answer to his nature based on this chapter (and not the bits in Graduation) – he’s Benedict Arnold, without the decency of having given great service to his country first only to be dogged by Congress and rivals. And he feeds his superiors what so-called ‘intel’ Grimm comes up with to avoid the chopping block while quietly getting rid of the much more practical avenues to the same thing.
I mean, his argument essentially hinges on “I’m a general, shut up you bleeding heart liberal”, especially since Kim does EXACTLY what he claims to do: She takes on the scum where they live. Yet it reads as if we’re supposed to side with him, especially as again all of Kim’s arguments are perfectly set up for him to destroy her further with his hypocrisy that Kim never calls out or challenges, she just… takes it. Why isn’t Kim beating General Probable with the bat of RoZ until he’s black and blue – that should more or less blacklist Grimm as an asset and utterly destroys General Probable’s argument, yet… it’s just ignored and makes Kim look weak as a result – to the point where her last promise at the end sounds completely empty and hollow when in the show it would’ve been rather terrifying.
I mean for crying out loud, why is it that the only reason that the US has a Department of Mysticism is Grimm? Why is Grimm the only way they can get their hands on all sorts of super tech? Are the numerous scientists like Cyrus Bortle or Doctor Freemen who’d love to have the government pocketbook behind their research gone? Are they somehow incapable of asking Wade for doing development for them? Why is it that they can only get it from whatever Grimm (supposedly) nicks from the villains?
Heck, if anything this chapter seems to be dedicated to the idea of destroying that Kim has actually accomplished anything, like with General Probable knocking her off as a spotlight hog when he has dozens of disposable riflemen who can do the same thing. Okay one, Kim is not a spotlight hog as described considering the times she’s irritated by being shoved out of it it’s because she’s also being attacked just like General Probable is doing now, and two: if it was so easy to foil the villains, why is it that Kim’s one of the foremost against them and the villains aren’t just being unceremoniously taken out by these supposed teams that General Probable has that can do what Kim does?
If you really want to think about it, the reason why Probable can say that the villains haven’t won despite Grimm enabling them? Because they’ve got a battle hardened cheerleader interrupting the plans all the time despite having basically be given the tools by the US government. Grimm has been biting the hand that feeds him every time, and Kim can’t stop it because then too many will suffer, so Grimm’s got a free ride (Gee isn’t that /lucky/ of him?) and they can tell themselves a nice little fiction to pretend they aren’t a bunch of sociopaths exploiting their country for personal gain.
Grimm is basically finding out that a terrorist is going to bomb a city by giving them the bomb in the city itself. All it takes is one slip up and it all goes down. Yet we’re supposed to somehow believe that Grimm is somehow stopping it. And if his mother is as good at diplomacy as General Probable is, I think America would be better served with Maverick as an ambassador. At least watching the birdie is somewhat amusing!
Heck speaking of that, Kim’s probably done more for America’s good image (and good) than the entire Probable family put together. Yet why is it that no one recognizes her? And why does Kim herself seem to think that the only people who’d really be familiar with her is people in government like the Probables or those involved with villainy – serving it like Twitch, or fighting against it, or just fans of how she supposedly tweaks Grimm.
It feels like you just got rid of Kim’s one big edge against Grimm – she’s a known person who many look up to – and got rid of it in favor of her being just a spotlighted but otherwise replaceable asset. Especially while Grimm’s being talked up at the same time or getting to show off to the point even Kim is impressed.
And Kim’s not being recognized by guys that practically brown their pants at the idea of her being around like Twitch. Actually on that, let’s get away from the rant. Everyone thinking Grimm ditched Rhonda for Kim; is there a history there that would make them think he shelled out cash for a KP cosplayer or something? Because way too many are assuming he ditched and not realizing that it’s Kim Possible right there.
Then there’s the seppuku scenario – okay, Grimm’s paranoid and it probably wasn’t meant for Kim directly… you know, until Wade found out that they planted files without him knowing it for the forgeries into his computer. Uh… so why is it that Jade’s always able to buzz Wade’s systems without him noticing, even after he realized it had happened once and would shore up accordingly?
And heck, why is it that even now Kim is falling hook line and sinker for all of Grimm’s traps? It was stupid earlier in the story where she completely forgot about it so Rhonda could make cracks about Pandaroo, it’s even stupider now since she SHOULD be on guard for Grimm pulling stuff, especially since he had shown his colors last chapter trying to bail.
Alright, I’m going to end the negativity there… it’s something that I don’t like doing on an otherwise good story, but I think it really needs to be said in an honest analysis. This chapter just sets of more huge warning flags in my mind and makes me hate Grimm and his family when this is supposed to be an elaboration on who he is, and I really have ranted enough on Grimm's legion of defenses.
On a positive note, I loved what you did with the Omo-sa’s. It would’ve been easy to have Jade be alone with a single parent and too much time, but not only did you do something different, you went and did something to tie into the greater canon. You made the Omo-sa’s rivals of Nakasumi, did something different with them, and even managed to get some great moments in like Jade calling out the fact that they’re the foreigners in America. And the fortune cookies were quite apt at highlighting Mr. Omo-sa’s personality (I’ll have to see how the one Wade thought was for Kim played out…)
So on that good job: even with my irritation, one thing I will say is that Riddleton is a (mostly) well thought out concept (addressing their supplies) and I imagine that'll be a highlight for the next chapter, how you continue to create parallels without total 1 to 1 copying.
And to end – a question. General Probable introduces Doctor Director as ‘his liaison’ – what were you meaning with that? Was Doctor Director originally just an American contribution to GJ but rose high in the ranks, or is GJ actually answering to General Probable somehow? I couldn’t really tell from the context; maybe it gets elaborated later (I certainly remember why GJ has to ‘give Grimm room’), but I don’t recall exactly what you had GJ as.