|Reviews for Nightingale|
| Dayadhvam chapter 5 . 10/14/2007
Haha, I liked this chapter. :) Your description of the fight is really good; usually, authors write something along the lines of, "He feigned a punch, ducked, got struck in the face and fell over." You've obviously thought the scene out really well; Neji's eye-gun technique (or whatever it's supposed to be called) was really quite awesome! :) By the "he" Neji's thinking of, that's Itachi, right?
"You’re going to kill, Uchiha Sasuke?" Is that just a misplaced comma? I was under the impression Neji was thinking in astonishment to himself, "You're going to kill Sasuke? Like, how'd this happen?" :P
"Itachi says 'hi.'" You've had beautiful diction and phrasing throughout the chapter, but this one sentence was the one that really stuck out to me. I think I started laughing when I read it; it sounds so *flippant*, in comparison to the situation. :D
Looking forward to the next chapter :)
| dustbowls chapter 5 . 10/14/2007
I don't think sound effects really translate well into words, and so I shall spare you my first reaction. It would only disturb you.
Such a good chapter. Brilliant. And I love the way Neji gets to verbally bite his thumb at Sasuke, even though the Uchiha just won't die. And really, the action sequence was amazing. I could never write something like that.
| Lellian chapter 5 . 10/14/2007
Dude. DUDE. (See the lack of eloquence I've been reduced to?)
I guffawed at the idea of just what Neji's face would look like if he knew Sasuke compared his fighting style to a microwave. In fact, the first third or so of this I found extremely damn amusing because of the wry way in which you narrated it. It made my inner dead-pan appreciation fanclub happy.
Hell, your story just generally makes me happy. This is, quite officially, one of the best fight scenes I've ever read. Ever.
And Neji? Of COURSE using your eyes like chakra machine guns is gonna hurt. Geez. (But please don't be too incapacitated in the next chapter - I'd hate to lose you now.)
Nice to know that I'm not the only one the site's being pesky for. I'm now off to see if I can (finally) upload some Team Gai stuff.
To the next chapter! *Bows*
| MirrorFade chapter 5 . 10/14/2007
Loved all the violence, very well-written. My only comment would be your use of the word "microwaved". Are there even microwaves in the Naruto-universe? That's just one of my pet peeves. Otherwise, awesome job.
| Drake-Azathoth chapter 4 . 10/13/2007
Heya. Loving this story.
I love the... Gritty realism, I suppose I should say, to this story. Though Naruto is still a fantastic setting, the way you show relationships and events with Neji's cynical clarity is great. His voice in this is perfect.
Liked Kabuto's arrogance and irritating ability to recover his closed tenketsu. Really loved Neji's quashed internal impulse to maim Hinata. Untainted nobility not only isn't him, it would be a bit repulsive under the circumstances.
And of course I'm eager to see what Itachi did. Poor Neji. ;)
| dustbowls chapter 4 . 10/12/2007
I love Neji. I love your writing. Brilliant ideas, great characterization, etc, etc. Your renditions of the Uchiha brothers are dead-on, meaning that they are as enigmatic and annoying as hell. As well they should be.
Although I still think Neji would be the taller. Personal bias, maybe? :P
| Anise chapter 4 . 10/8/2007
-It's nice to find a story that seems to have such an interesting plot, it's got me constantly asking questions like is Hinata going to throw a fit when she gets home demanding they go help Neji and of course what's Itachi got to do with everything.
-Your creative descriptions like dragons or origami birds in the stomach were wonderful, I love stories with little details like that I find it makes a story really enjoyable to read! :)
-I can't wait to read the rest of this story especially now that Sasuke's finally appeared and I look forward to the upcoming fight, although it doesn't seem really fair since Neji's already fought Kabuto.
-I just found this story and read the whole thing all at once, it's definitely caught my interest and I'm definitely looking forward to reading the rest of it! :)
| Kadesh too lazy to log-in chapter 4 . 10/7/2007
I've been MIA from ffnet for so long but I couldn't help but spend the last hour glued to my computer because of this story.
I have no complaints other than grammatical errors that disrupt the flow.
Besides that, you're pretty much amazing.
| MirrorFade chapter 4 . 10/7/2007
Great chapter, you write combat well. Much better than most. Neji is, as always, completely in character, and so was Kabuto. I am curious, though, as to the meaning of the chapter title. Something to do with fear, right?
| crystaline tears chapter 4 . 10/6/2007
love, love, love...
| Ami chapter 4 . 10/6/2007
I am so ridiculously excited to see where you are going with this. As I mentioned before- it's simultaneously dark and hilarious, which makes this fic simply DELICIOUS. Wonderful fight scenes too ;)
| alpha2nd2006 chapter 4 . 10/6/2007
Awesome as always. I really think you have the characters down. Curse Sasuke and his b*st*rdlyness! XD
| Dayadhvam chapter 4 . 10/6/2007
Oh, this is sheer brilliance! I love Neji's interactions with the Uchihas-it's a little chilling to see how Sasuke acts so distant and cold (granted, they didn't know each other very well even in Konoha). Sasuke: "Your choice in words is quite a mistake on your part"-I'm wondering which one of Neji's words he's referring to. Is it the 'bastard' epithet, or Neji's mention of Sasuke's 'friends' in the first place? :)
And oh!-dear Hinata. :) You write the Naruto characters very well. Kudos, and looking forward to the next chapter!
| Lellian chapter 4 . 10/6/2007
M, update. Better than food.
Both Uchiha in the space of two chapters - impressive. Even more so when they both seem so aptly characterised and believable. I was particularly amused by Sasuke's condescension towards Neji - that “I guess most people are polite to their betters.” comment made me wince on Neji's behalf. It was just the sort of thing that would get to our darling Hyuuga.
Something else I like? The fact that, even at the height of all this, Hinata can't say rude things - harsh words, as you put it.
And you mentioned the origami cranes in his stomach again. I adore that metaphor. So much.
Is there anything that you can't do well? Humour, battle scenes, angst, wonderful characterisation...I'm green with envy over here, positively emerald.
Until the next chapter!
| TheWatcherandReader chapter 3 . 10/5/2007
Very interesting. Worth keeping an eye on, at least. Keep on updating.