Reviews for Another Menace
Wowza48 chapter 2 . 7/17/2013
Submitting this in case you ever want to start up another "the next battle" type of zatch bell story
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Team 1
Mamodo:

Name: Striker Steller

Age: (5 to 20 years old) 15

Appearance: (looks and clothing) : / wowza48 . deviantart art / Kitty-girl-and-scary-cyborg-280703191 (minus spaces, one on the left)
His natural eye color is orange, however his left eye is completely mechanical, and his natural one has nanotech inside it to self repair the natural eye and the brain, as well as make it so it can be used in the same way the mechanical one can. His right arm and left leg are mechanical, and with the acceptation of his head, his natural body is covered with a green armor, which is also natural and self repairing. His mechanical arm and leg can repair themselves to an extent, but only enough to where he can fix them himself later, and move them around, assuming they weren't completely destroyed. His robotic arm can turn into a cannon, and his claws, both robotic and natural, can regenerate instantly. It can't be seen without looking hard at his head, but under his skin of his head, he has self fixing wires connecting to both his eyes.

Personality: He is a bit of a jerk and can be rude at times. Is somewhat greedy and willing to sacrifice his pride for a price, but there are some things even he would never stoop low enough to do. Hesitates if he has to fight a girl, but has no restraint other than that slight hesitation at the beginning. somewhat protective over Kit Kat. Enjoys killing those who deserve it, is an evil genius, only isn't really evil, and Kit Kat is slowly helping him become how a king is supposed to be, strong, and stern, but kind and forgiving.

Book Color: Purple

Spell Theme: Blaster/arm cannon/claws, most of his spells need his mechanical arm, but he normally uses his mechanical arm for all his spells any way.

Spell List: (minimum of 5 spells, can reuse spells from the anime/manga)
1. druo: extends upwards and claws fire simultaneous at all directions. If hit by the spell when he uses claws from his natural arm instead of the mechanical one (which is rare for him to do), the opponent is poisoned.
2. Dru shieldo: a shield created by the mechanical arm's energy
3. Blindru – fires a blinding light, which not only blinds the enemy but also wipes out anything in its way. can be fired from arms, legs, mouth, or his mechanical eye.
4. wisp aru: Arm extends and homes in on targets head. Lifts them upward and as time goes by grip tightens on them. (mechanical arm only)
5. Druruk: fixes robotic parts and strengthen them
6. Gigano druo: more powerful version of druo, same effects apply here.
7. Dioga druo: Shoots a dark matter blast that homes in on opponent. Has a chance that it gives the opponent a bleed out effect if using mechanical arm's claws. Badly poisons if using natural arm's claws.
8. Druotengen sariem: Fires Electrified Claw at enemy that pins them down. With the free claw starts clawing simultaneously at opponent. (will not poison the opponent, but it may cause severe cuts that will cause them to bleed to death)

Abilities: (anything outside of spells) He is an expert sniper, he has super strength and stealth. can turn invisible naturally after gaining his 5th spell, very smart and excellent with machines and hacking.

Morality: (Good, Neutral, Evil) which ever side he wants/who pays him more/what would better suit himself

Relationship with Partner: He cares about Kit Kat, but really doesn't see a reason to think that much of her. Takes her suggestions more seriously than he is willing to admit, let alone show. The relationship becomes friendship over enough time.

History: (brief life story)
He is a mercenary, and he is a neutral villain, but a villain all the same. He doesn't care about becoming king, he's just in the battle to see if he is the strongest. he is not afraid to kill, and enjoys it very much when he believes the one he is killing deserves to die, or that they deserve a fate worse than death. He is Jibojiki's enemy, and sometimes forces weaker mamodo teams to do his bidding or to act as bait. as he is a cyborg, he is quite smart, and calculating. if he has to help a good mamodo team for whatever reason, he'd claim that he was "just passing through" or some excuse that no one would believe. He starts out cold hearted, but Kit Kat helps him become somewhat of a better person, which gives him a soft spot for her. However, he does not leave his 'neutral villain' status because of it. it just makes him more likely to help the hero if they are in a jam instead of the villain, even if the villain does pay a lot of money/items or info of value for his aid in defeating the heros. depending on how far into the battle you let him go, his way of doing things may change. And yes, he did Kill Jibojiki's dad. He was offered a lot of valuable objects and access to information Striker was very interested in, but his employer double crossed him and that is why Striker's leg is mechanical. The rest of his mechanical parts were like that for as long as he could remember. (any more questions? pm me plz)

Human Partner:

Name: Kit Kat

Age: (5 to 99 years old) 15

Appearence: (Looks and clothing) : / wowza48 . deviantart art / Kitty-girl-and-scary-cyborg-280703191 (minus spaces, one on the right)

Personality: kind hearted, but vicious when needed

Morality: (Good, Neutral, Evil) wants to be good, is neutral thanks to striker

History: (brief life story) Kit Kat got her name due to being a human cat hybrid, and the fact she really liked KitKat bars when she was young. Not much is known about her parents, but the scientists who looked into her mutation acted as her foster family for a while, and taught her to the point where she is now smarter then they are. She was allowed to go with Striker so long as she promised to return. Seeing how she is both a valuable experiment and asset, as well as the fact the scientists in charge of her is being managed by the research and development branch of the Japanese government, anything she or Striker needs is being provided to them by the Japanese government so long as they continue to help work for the Japanese government in exchange. Kit Kat is very kind, and feels a debt both to the scientists that helped raise her, which is why she aids them and the Japanese government when she can, but Striker as well, which is why she serves him as his servant and bookkeeper. Due to her mutation, she has Cat like senses and reflexes in addition to her photographic memory and expert skills in hacking and chemistry. She can also help Striker with fixing his mechanical parts, but she is not good at actually making such things from scratch.
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Team 2
Mamodo:

Name: Jibojiki Danmatsuma

Age: (5 to 20 years old) 8

Appearance: (looks and clothing) Gold hair, black clock, red shirt with 3 gold buttons, black pants, midnight blue boots, sword in sheath same color as boots, looks like he is a few years older than he actually is due to his height.

Personality: noble clan mamodo, somewhat of a flirt, can use afterimages, angered at anyone who threatens his friends/bookkeeper/allies, is kind to many people unless he is possessed/being controlled or the person/people are evil, a lot of clans fear his, skilled swordsman, he and Yasuko come from the battle after the zatch bell manga

Book Color: tiedied: black, iron/grey and crimson

Spell Theme: despair and death

Spell List: (minimum of 5 spells, can reuse spells from the anime/manga)
1- contraston (assist, attack, heal) dark, black aura of despair surrounds his hands, he can use this to control any female he hits on the forehead with, where a mark the same color as the aura will form and stay until they are either dead, or freed, heals/magnifies the abilities/strength anyone he taps with it (if you need it to be further explained, pm me)
2- sordozakuzaku (body enhancement, assist, attack) his sword is covered in the same aura from the first spell, if it is damaged it will fix itself, it becomes very powerful, can use aura in unknown ways
3- Ganzu sordozakuzaku (body enhancement, assist, attack) same as 2nd spell, only faster and stronger
4- Dioga Zetsubo zakuzaku daisharin (attack) the spirit of his sword is summoned and launched as an attack at the opponent. it is powered by both hope, sadness, anger and despair
5- zetsubo destrocto reizudozu (body enhancement, assist) gains a huge burst of black aura that it fills a large amount of space before re-entering him quickly, leaving him surrounded by a white aura that temporarily upgrades his power from despair to death, this upgrade lasts as long as the aura does, however it takes a lot out of him to use it and is very weak after using it
(if I think of anymore spells for him, and you are using him, I'll pm you the spells)

Abilities: (anything outside of spells)
Zetsubo Nakami: Jibojiki's sword that only he can use to it's true potential. It was created by an ancestor of his, it is rumored that he is the reincarnation of the sword's creator. it has also been rumored that the ancestor sealed his own spirit into the sword (due to the difference between spirits and souls)
He is a skilled swordsman, and the leader of his clan.

Morality: (Good, Neutral, Evil) Neutral-Good (as in between Neutral and Good, or both.)

Relationship with Partner: Jibojiki thinks of Yasuko as a little sister, as well as someone who needs to be protected. He takes bets against Yasuko, despite knowing he'll lose every bet she accepts, because it keeps her happy and occupied, so she doesn't have to think about the dangers of the battle unless she has to.

History: (brief life story) Jibojiki is the leader of the noble clan known as the 'Danmatsuma', which was chosen to represent the family's power over despair. His family normally stayed out of the compitition for king, however Jibojiki joined in order to find his father's killer, who was rumored to also appear in th
Manbou chapter 6 . 1/2/2009
Tanio and Goruji's team always seem to be at each other's throats. Heh.

I like the sudden new plot twist and how you were able to describe it with such few words.
Manbou chapter 5 . 12/25/2008
Ah Goruji, I remember him. I might just use him in my new fic I just posted.

I've been looking at the spell guide on the forums and I realized that his spells totally deviate from the offical ones. Too late to change those now eh?

Yeah, this chapter was pretty short, but at least you submitted something. I thought this story was dead!
Loubhin chapter 4 . 10/28/2007
You did well enough at writing from a girl's perspective. Mira's a tough cookie, I'll give her that!

Uhm...a bad mamodo? Uh...hm...let's make one up, shall we? It's impromptu, so don't expect much...

Let's call him...Yukio. He looks like...uh..let's say a miniature grim reaper! Scythe and everything! And his book is...to be different...purple. A girly-non-evil purple that others might make fun of. And he doesn't like being made fun of. So...he's very bitter toward the world!

His spells...off the top of my head...

Griyo-swings his scythe and a nifty energy blade comes from it and flies at opponent

Don Griyo-sends...two nifty energy blades

She Griyond-spins scythe super fast and generates a girly-non-evil purple bubble-like sheild of sorts

Tri Griyoda-sends a wave of girly-non-evil purple energy at opponent

Banto Grito-eh...let's make this a girly-non-evil purple snakey-thingy...

And I'm out of ideas, hehe.

Book owner...let's make him be a teenager, shaggy black hair that covers his eyes and bad fashion sense. His name...urm...Jakuo! And...he whines...a lot...

And that's all I've got right off the top of my head for an evil mamodo...if you use him, he's all yours, if not, no worries!
Heaven has a Devil chapter 1 . 10/24/2007
bleh, sorry i forgot serion's abilities

Abilities: can drink poison like water, can see the opponent’s circulatory system, manipulate poison, and his spit/ saliva is poison
Heaven has a Devil chapter 4 . 10/21/2007
i like your story, i sense alot of twists ahead, anyway here's an evil mamodo

Note: please dont use him until around chapter 12 or later, as i consider him to be strong and so you can use some of his later spells

Mamodo name: Serion

Evil

Description: Spikey green hair, big hazel eyes, 5'4", light skinned, wears a green vest with a green t-shirt underneath which has a picture of a snake, army pants and boots, silver earing stud on his left ear, mamodo lines on cheek (he doesnt act like a bully until a fight starts, mostly quiet)

Age: 13

Gender: male

Partner name: Lex

Description: straight black hair, covers both eyes, black t-shirt with a skull and crossbones, ripped at sleeves, black jeans, ripped at bottom, earings along the edge of one ear, light skinned, 5'7", big black skating shoes (vans) (has a lot of patience, very intelegent, trash talks alot)

Age: 15

Gender: male

Spellbook color: light green

Spell type: Venom/Poison

Spells:

1)Baru- sends a green ball of poison at the opponent, if hit the opponent is poisoned for a short amount of time

2)Baruga- sends a green spiraling cone shaped beam from his hand that does a lot more damage than Baru, yet does not poison

3)Barushirudo- circular green sheild that can take mediume damage (does not reflect)

4)Baruk- Serion grows longer, sharper teeth that inject venom in to the opponent when they sink into his/her flesh

5)Ganzu Baruson- multiple shots of Baru, yet a little stronger

6)Kiro Barushirudo- bigger version of Barushirudo, with reflection and added poison damage

7)Rior Baruga- sends a Baruga from each hand

8)Raurusu Baruk- Serion grows bigger poisoned teeth and his arms turn green and scaley (Baru, Baruga, Ganzu Baruson, and Rior Baruga get stronger. If Vioniri Baruga is used after this spell clone only gains green and scaley arms, not teeth)

9)Vioniri Baruga- Serion clones him self. Clone acts independently but does not use spells
Manbou chapter 4 . 10/14/2007
Well, if no one would submit a villain, then I will.

Mamodo

Name: Aredun

Age & Appearance: Age 10. Stands no taller than 4 feet. He has short, neatly trimmed purple hair and lazy purple eyes. He has two small curved, golden horns on his head. He wears a long dark-blue robe that reachs his heels. His weapon is a wand with a star on the tip. He is very thin and seemingly unfit.

Background: Aredun is a young mamodo with a wide array of talents that are outside that of combat. His main strength lies in his brilliant mind. At such a young age, that talent earned him the title of "Little Scholar" in Mamodo World. However, despite his amazing thinking capacity, Aredun is very arrogant and opposes the opinions of others. This goes even against the way that the Mamodo World is run. At times, he could shift between the line that separates a genius and a madman. His plans for the Mamodo World remain a mystery, but he is sure to promote destructive, drastic change in his image.

Aredun would go to any lengths to acheive his goal, but he detests fighting. Aredun never openly attacks his opponents. His body is not built for fighting and he lacks the strength of most Mamodo. A couple of direct hits on him is more than enough to bring him down. Aredun prefers to attack his opponents with power when they are truly vulnerable. He also enjoys to keep his opponents guessing on his next move.

Spells:

1. Unrukuu: Aredun uses his wand to create a distortion in space and time. This spell can change the direction of an opponent's attack.

2. Zin Unrukuu: Aredun tears open a rift in space and time. Any attack that enters is immediately transfered and fired out of another rift (output rift is limited to a 5 meter radius from Aredun).

3. Dionuu Extermis: The star at the tip of Aredun's wand fires off. If it sticks on a target, the victim is immobilized. However, he/she can still attack. Spell wears off in 10 seconds.

4. Unruu Soluudas: Aredun creates a miniature sun in his hand that he can hurl at the enemy (severely drains Arudun's power).

5. Copanno Von Aredun: This spell allows Aredun to copy and mimic the last attack he saw his opponent use. The cost of energy is still equal to the amount his opponent would use to cast it.

Human

Name: Jim Lorenzo

Age & Appearance: Age 31. Stands at 5'9. He has messy white hair and an unkempt white beard. He is a thin man wearing as little as a t-shirt and oily slacks.

Background: Jim is a greedy and starving man with nowhere to go and nothing to eat until Aredun fell into his lap. Ever since, Jim has been using Aredun to help him sneak into cities and loot on food. Aredun doesn't care how badly his powers are abused. He is only interested in getting to his goal.

As you can see, I didn't want to go for the generic bad guy who only thinks about killing and destruction. There's some spice for you. Hope to see more of this.
21321451 chapter 4 . 10/13/2007
Gah, Kali was supposed to be neutral, not eventually on Tanio's side.

Anyway, can you change Kali's spell Darozei Akuron to Ganzei Akuron?
kpizkool chapter 4 . 10/12/2007
I Know why dont you have this power mad mamodo with a buzz cut and blood red eyes waring punk clothes and a snobby rich boy with girly hair and a tuxedo ?
Loubhin chapter 3 . 10/7/2007
Hehehe...coolness! I can't wait for the next chapter!
Manbou chapter 3 . 10/6/2007
I haven't taken offense to the personality twist that you put on Goruji. In fact, team Keklin/Goruji seems to be quite similar to team Sherry/Brago. That's pretty cool. AND Keklin is a soldier! He has authority (also cool).
kpizkool chapter 3 . 10/6/2007
Please put my person in The mamodo is about 4 years old named kari she thinks the battle is a game and dosent really want to be in it she has black hair that goes to her waist with crystal pink eyes she is wearing a light pink dress that goes to her knees and is bare are spoimk, spoomefe and Poiew the first makes a shield

the second makes indestructible bubbles come out the third makes her transform into any thing. Her partner is a model that is very distant to every one except Kari her name is has dark brown hair and deep blue eyes she dosent want to fight Her age is about 17 she drives all boys crazy and is very fond of Sean
Azelf and Jirachi chapter 3 . 10/6/2007
Gah, whatever. Fine, here's a mamodo.

Mamodo

Name: Kali

Age & Appearance: 5, Kali wears a pink headband to tie back her long, blue hair. She wears a pink kimono with blue sashes, and small, blue boots. Her eyes are green. Please do not copy and paste this description.

Background: Kali dislikes the battle a lot. However, she burns the book of anyone she meets, if only out of a child's fear. Occasionally, if her opponent surrenders, Kali just gets that person to burn other people's books for her.

Spells:

1) Akuru: Kali fires a stream of water from her hands.

2) Ashirudo: Kali summons a circular shield of water.

3) Zei Akuron: Kali and Mira disappear and water clones replace them, but nothing changes to the naked eye. If the water clone is hit by a spell, it loses color and sloshes water around. Kali and Mira then reform from the leftover water. Note that the water clone can use spells.

4) Ganzu Akuru: Kali fires many water spheres from her hands.

5) Oruda Kuran: Kali raises her hands and summons 4 large water tentacles from the ground behind her. Kali must focus all her attention on them to control them, leaving her rather open to an attack if someone gets around the spell.

6) Darozei Akuron: Kali visibly disappears, but nothing happens to Mira. Twelve water clones form. If Mira calls a spell besides one that creates water clones, then all the clones will use the spell. Kali reforms from the water once all the clones are destroyed.

7) Akuru Andaido: Kali summons a large volume of water and can control it with body movements, including freezing it into ice. Pretty similar to a waterbender from Avatar.

Human

Name: Mira

Age: 9

Background: She pretty much does whatever Kali says, although she sometimes feels there's more to the battle than just burning books.
Manbou chapter 2 . 9/20/2007
ACK! Well, Mad Max isn't an anime so I'm ruled out...

Guess the only thing I'll do is submit a fan mamodo.

Mamodo

Name: Goruji

Age & Appearance: Age 14. About 5'2. Spiky black hair that leans to the right and brown eyes. A cybernetic mamodo whose body is made of gray metal with the exception of his head and a red energy crystal at his stomach. He wears a helmet with a pink visor that covers the top half of his face. He is somewhat fit, but not entirely muscular.

Background: Goruji is a mamodo who comes to see that the human world is a terrible place. He constantly questions the goodness in a human's heart. Goruji is fairly intelligent and very thoughtful. He hopes to rule the world of mamodos in order to prevent it from falling into the hands of a tyrant. He also hopes to better understand humans by bridging a strong connection with his partner.

Goruji is strong and able to shrug off minor attacks and withstand stronger ones to a certain extent, but he has no real fighting style. He depends entirely on his spells, so he and his partner are working to patch that weakness. He can fly with the use of a jet-pack.

Spells:

1. Aruushi: Goruji fires a piercing red laser from the red crystal on his stomach.

2. Aruushildo: Goruji generates a transparent red barrier in front of him.

3. Zon Aruushidon: Goruji's chest plate opens to reveal launchers. Three guided missles are fired.

4. Zonis Arukuuma: Goruji is equipped and can attack with a flamethrower (right arm).

5. Zonis Arusaani: Turns Goruji's left hand into a drill (both weapons could be equipped at the same time.)

6. Lacorezz Zigmundo: A second layer of armor forms on top of the first, granting Goruji better defensive and offensive power.

7. Gigano Aruushi: Can only be done after activating "Lacorezz Zigmundo." Deadly bolts of plasma are fired from the red crystal.

8. Gigano Aruushildo: Can only be done after activating "Lacorezz Zigmundo." Stronger, bigger shield.

9. Dioga Zon Aruushidon: Ultimate Spell. Can only be done after activating "Lacorezz Zigmundo." Unleash a countless amount of guided missles.

Human

Name: Keklin Sonra

Age & Appearance: Age 15. About 5'6. Short, unruly brown hair and brown eyes. Thin figured. Clad in tatters.

Background: Keklin is a youth who lives in a settlement of make-shift homes. Under harsh conditions of the degrading world, he is forced to live on little food and water. He is sick and disgusted with fighting and hopes that there could be a day when earth can flourish. After meeting Goruji, the two make a vow that they would work hard to save both their worlds from ill-fortune.

I hope to see more of your writing.
Loubhin chapter 2 . 9/20/2007
It still reminds me of Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind...is that where the inpiration came from?

Anywho...I like it bunches! Update soon!
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