Reviews for Handcuffs
SimplyKey chapter 23 . 6/17/2009
lol, that was well..random but very interesting
NaruSasuFTW chapter 2 . 5/1/2009
OMG this is so freaking funny i love it!
Shelly J88 chapter 2 . 3/13/2009
that was so freaking funny! LMAO! Two of my most favorite part of the whole story:

1) Edward, again I ask. WHERE DO I SLEEP, FATTY?

I shrugged as I opened my car door. “In the car?”

No! It smells like vampire!

Shrugging, I stepped in, letting Jacob climb over me again.

We’ll get a motel room.

My eyes widened and I slowly looked at him, so disgusted, I think the blood I just consumed would come back up.


Gently, I shook my head and looked forward again.

You suck. I-I, you like- no ew, that, like, no, ew, um, ew, I HATE YOU, CULLEN!

With my eyebrows pressed hard together, I stomped on the gas and the car flew forward. I knew Jacob didn’t mean it like that, but hearing it gives me chills.

“I’m not getting a motel room with you, gay person.”

I mentally laughed at how his face turned red and he banged his head against the dashboard. “I so didn’t mean it like that. We would have two beds, ugly, fat, disgusting, MAN! You have a sick mind.” He screamed.

I laughed out loud this time and slowed down, arriving at an Inn. “Okay, but you promise not to leave me after tonight?”

He twitched. “I. Hate. You.”

I put my hand on my heart. “I thought we had something special!”

2)But 2:00 in the morning came way too soon. An enormous roar came from Jacob. I looked at him, my eyes wide. And when the smell came my way, my mouth dropped and I stood up quickly, running to the end of the room. He clunked along.

“OW! YOU RETARD, WHY’D YOU DO THAT?” Jacob barked.

I paused and looked for breath. “That was the most heinous thing I’ve ever smelt.”

“Excuse me, but can’t say I didn’t warn you.”

I rolled my eyes, and when the stink somewhat dissolved, I walked back over to the right side of the bed, and attempted pushing the side table away, but it was nailed down, and I didn’t want to be charged for breaking it.

“Okay, genius. Just sleep on the floor, I can’t move the table.”

I aint sleeping on the floor.

I rolled my eyes and realized that he wasn’t going to back down, so I walked back over to the left side of the bed and held my breath. Jacob smiled and fell asleep on the bed.

An hour later, a louder roar pierced a hole through me. I couldn’t stand this. Without thinking, I simply sat on the bed next to him and turned him over so he was on his back.

This looks really, really wrong.

Emmett and Jasper can never know that I’m in bed with a werewolf.
msdramaqueeny chapter 13 . 1/3/2009
hahahah this is so funny! Definitely keep writing these funny stories because i'm cracking up!
KamikazeDestiny08 chapter 18 . 12/31/2008
I feel so smart after reading this...
KamikazeDestiny08 chapter 5 . 12/30/2008
**died of laughter*
KamikazeDestiny08 chapter 2 . 12/30/2008
This is hysterical.

Jacob reminds me of a PMSing 5-year-old
backtwisted chapter 1 . 10/4/2008
The Green Bird chapter 3 . 8/18/2008
OMG. There HAS to be hot werewolf/vampire sex in here!

Dude Mike, they are SO couple. ;)

Can you tell I hate Bella?

Highly amusing piece of work.
Red-by-Midnight chapter 1 . 8/6/2008
OMG! that was hysterical! i was laughing the through the whole story! Loved it. the Edward and Jacob part was my Fav.
VampGrlz271 chapter 5 . 7/24/2008

huffpuff94 chapter 2 . 7/4/2008
"You know, Cullen, that deer probably had parents. A husband . . . two little and little Timmy. So they’ll come home from soccer practice and ask their dad . . . Fred . . . where their mommy is. And Fred will say that she was killed by a vampire." Ha! This is so funny! Edward is a fat pineapple! rotfl
huffpuff94 chapter 1 . 7/4/2008
Your house is ugly

“So is your face.”

BURN! That was so funny, and they weren't that OOC actually. No what I expected
I am Harry Cullen chapter 23 . 5/1/2008
that was great!
onpermanenthaitus chapter 23 . 4/30/2008
lolz i loved it thx for writing it :)
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