Reviews for Nami's Journey
Disregard This chapter 4 . 5/11/2009
WELL MAYBE I LIKE STAYING IN THE SHADOWS! Great story anyway! :D
Sapphos-Daughter chapter 2 . 3/16/2008
Overall, I found this chapter very confusing. You should separate the flashbacks so that they aren’t running into the main storyline set in the present. I’ve also noticed that you while you are talented at dialogue, you seem to have trouble with detail and descriptions as far as setting and what character may look like.

As a suggestion, you should look into getting a beta reader, which might help you expand your style and point out other errors that you may have missed.

Please continue with this story!

Tammy

Founder of Reviewers Kingdom
Sapphos-Daughter chapter 1 . 3/16/2008
Not bad for a beginning, yet even for a prologue I think that you need to add more detail about the main character. Not everyone is going to read the story that this is based off of (even though it would be a wise idea), so you want to be careful that you add enough background information about Nami as well as her prior adventures to make sure that your readers aren’t feeling lost.

Still, I hope that the next chapter will be a good one.

Tammy

Founder of Reviewers Kingdom
DFHSJGHBS chapter 1 . 3/7/2008
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SHIT LAWL