|Reviews for Tales of Trinity|
| ladycordelia17 chapter 22 . 7/30/2009
Wow, you haven't made a blip on my radar in a long time. You said it was because of a computer-crash as big as the Orc King's hammer crashing down on you, or something like that, if I recall correctly. Glad to see you're able to update your fics again.
So the Dezeltans must have some kind of back-up crystal, because they decided to send what myrrh was in their chalice back to the village and search for answers on their own. Princess Fiona, meanwhile, is trying hard to blend in with the caravanners, but there's a Lilty who can't stop staring at her. Hope things pan out decently for the Dezeltans-and for the caravan from Trinity. Hope the Trinity caravanners find what they're looking for in their slog through the Lynari Desert...
I've been busy while you've been away, btw-I finally lived up to a promise I made to SasukeBlade a long while back (posted oneshot "I Find I'm Not Afraid") and added two more chapters to my crossover "Sword of Redemption."
| Master-of-Omega chapter 22 . 7/30/2009
Hey, nice to see you updated! Let me guess, the dreaded (Insert scary background music) Writer's Block! Dun dun dun. lol. Yeah, I'm personaly suffering from it as we speak. Er, type? Meh, big difference. Truth be told I can barely remember where this fic left off! But you got a new chapter in, that's what's importent. Also, forgive me for advertising but I need reviews to live, I recently put my own Crystal Chronicles fic on. Only one chapter so far but it's still pretty good... mabye, dunno, no reviews yet. Once again forgive me for advertising!
Btw, you said you have 3 diehard reviewers, might I be one of them?
| Sput-sama chapter 1 . 4/19/2009
Oh my gosh! I just randomly read a little bit into this and needed to review already! Ok lesse here...the characters are awesome. The comedy is great. And I'm addicted already. Ok here goes! I'm gonna read more now!
| Sue D. Nihm chapter 21 . 3/19/2009
...You killed off Bal Dat. I did not see that coming. I didn't even believe it myself, until your end note. Wow.
You really manage to get emotional ties to your characters. I /cared/ about Bal Dat, and not because of his character in the game or because he has pretty pink hair. You made him a complex, feeling character who changed and grew over time. And he just started to realize his growth himself...
His grandfather must be really proud, y'know? And Bal can rest easy, because he finally figured out why his grandfather did what he did that fateful day. He understands.
And Sera...you really make it clear that she's a circus girl without a safety net. Her supports are being cut one by one, and she doesn't really know what's holding her up anymore.
Don't feel the slightest tinge of guilt about going on hiatus, if needed. While this is without a doubt the best multi-chaptered CC fanfic I've read, you are still a human being and not a writing robot. You have a real life. I can respect that, even though I don't quite understand it myself. xD And you can hardly blame yourself for a hard drive crash. But they say that when you are forced to rewrite something due to such a loss, it is always better than it was originally, so...! Have good cheer. And you should probably replace your school things before fanfiction, though it pains me to say so. Funny thing, life - apparently fanfiction doesn't pay rent. Tch.
| ladycordelia17 chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
When the storm breaks over the Leuda-bound ferry, everyone hastens to secure their wagons, but the ropes just won't hold-and Sera Li jumps back into the Trinity caravan's about-to-tip-overboard wagon to retrieve the chalice, so it looks like she'll fall and drown. But Bal Dat gives his all in the effort to help her...and ultimately he's the one that ends up drowning, even as the caravanners (with some clever spellcasting on Mioko's part) manage to secure their wagon and help the other passengers do the same. Rest in peace, Bal Dat. T_T
Was the dream the Lady Mio's way of reassuring Sera Li, I wonder (showing that De Nam was safe), or just wishful dreaming? I hope it's the former-poor girl needs the reassurance now, of all times.
And will the caravanners get a letter from Princess Fiona or from the Dezelta caravan about Gurdy's poem before they try to make their way through the Lynari Desert? (Good gods, I hated that dungeon!) They'll need the insight to get the mysterious element for their chalice.
As usual, good work so far, and please update soon! :)
| Master-of-Omega chapter 21 . 3/5/2009
Ouch, sorry to hear about your laptop. But you gotta admit, the way you said it was funny. Still sucky though. BAL! NO! AND SERA WAS JUST STATING TO FEEL BETTER! Oh well. Oh yeah, you remember what I told you last review? About it being quiet and your update making me crap my pants? Well it happend agian. YOU ARE FREAKING EVIL! DO YOU HAVE A CAMERA IN HERE TO TELL WHEN I'M ONLINE OR SOMTHING!
| SasukeBlade chapter 21 . 3/5/2009
Don't worry about updating quickly. All of us reading understand. I'm sorry about your hard drive, that's a painful blow for not just your writing but your schoolwork too.
I want you to know that I cried for Bal Dat. I really did. Part of me is mad at you for that, because I usually come to to cheer up, but mostly I'm just impressed by how well you wrote this whole storm scenario. Nice inclusion of Mio. I like how you described her as childlike in a way.
One thing that bothered me was that you included Sera worrying about the chalice spilling. The ship and caravan had already been tilted sideways several times. Unless the chalice was hanging from a rope (which I didn't think it was) it would have tipped already. In the midst of that panic it just seemed like such a paltry thing to worry about. She needed to save the chalice so they could go through the miasma, but there wasn't much myrrh to begin with.
I hope this review brightens your day even a little bit.
| BreathlessCyan chapter 21 . 3/5/2009
...Bal... Bal's dead, dying right after he told her (in so many words) that he loved her. Sera lived, but because she lived someone had to take her place, and that person happened to be Bal Dat. It's ever so sad, I want to cry. See you next time. (Chapter 10 still isn't up,grr... You want to beta it for me?)
| SasukeBlade chapter 20 . 3/5/2009
You cruel, cruel author, how could you do this to me? Here I am, ensnared in the sheer horror and drama, and then you throw in suspense? You make me love these characters, and then you almost kill half of them! Argh!
Anyway, I must say I'm incredibly impressed with the skill with which you've managed to weave canon and your own story here. Seriously, I'm jealous. And I'm looking forward to the next update, when I finally get to know what happens next.
| Tabbi-Katt chapter 20 . 2/13/2009
I apologize in advance for the long review. I would usually cut it up and review each chapter as I’m reading but I was enjoying this story so much that I read straight through without stopping.
First off, excellent storm scene. A lot of fantasy stories throw in a boat in a storm to add tension but usually fail. This was well-written and had me on the edge of my seat.
Moving on, this is more-so the story in general:
I think your writing is very good and shows a lot of promise of becoming published-author-worthy, although there are a few nitpicky things, like saying ‘sat’ instead of ‘sitting’. The imagery is very well done and every word seems to be chosen carefully, which is really nice to see in a fic. The scene in Tida was really well done because it shows readers, “Holy crap, this is a really bad thing that’s happening here, with the myrrh disappearing. Look how desperate everyone’s become!” Very good.
Your characters are also really well-done, especially Sera Li and Kass. There was one line way back in the earlier chapters when Kass remarks on Mioko’s shopping that he would follow her to the ends of the earth to protect her but go just as far to avoid shopping with her; I loved that line because it shows how close the two are that they can joke like that. There are sometimes I think Ciaran gets a bit lost in the shuffle of all the other characters, because he doesn’t get a lot of attention compared to the others. But, who knows, maybe in a chapter soon you’ll surprise us with something.
I also really like the way you incorporate the Striped Brigands into the story. Personally, I’m not much of a fan, since they’re just comic relief, but it’s nice to see them being part of a story instead of just thrown in for laughs. (Though that bit of about quality being better than quantity made me burst out laughing.) And I know what you mean when the old guy died. My sister and I were sitting there, “Pfft, he’s not dead! He’ll walk in any second now, ‘Wow, I was knocked out for a while.’” Scene ends, he’s still dead. It was very sad, and you did great getting the emotion of that down for poor Bal.
One little thing I’d like to mention. This won’t be so helpful right now, but for future reference...
It seems to me that De Nam knows too much. I know he’s a scholar so he would know more than the average person but he seems too smart for one person. In any other story you write in the future (which I hope you do) it might be a bit better to space that intelligence over at least two people.
I’m really loving the story so far, it’s unique and engaging and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
And now my ridiculously long review comes to end.
| BreathlessCyan chapter 20 . 2/5/2009
Ah! Cliffhanger! I love thunderstorms, but this one seems a bit too... severe. Sera better be OK! You'll have me to deal with if she doesn't! But of course I'm being mean in my story... Sera seems to have snapped out of it for the most part, which is good. I was wondering about the chalice as they were rushing to get out of the caravan, and I knew it had to be on there, just waiting for it to pop in somewhere. They lose their caravan, pratically there home. You did very well building the suspense for this chapter, and only increased it with the astonishing cliffhanger you put on. By the way, my brother finally got to reading the chapter, and is halfway through the 9 pages. Thanks for the offer, I'm sure you'll be able to do something on another chapter. :p
| Master-of-Omega chapter 20 . 2/5/2009
GGYAH! IHATECLIFFHANGERS! THEYARESOFRIGGINANOYING! EVIL!
Don't ask... Anyway You freaked me out when you updated, I have it set to email me when this fic updates. So I'm sitting at the computer and it's completely quiet when, at max volume for some reason, "WE MEET AGAIN AT LAST." HOLY *! DARTH VADER IS ATTACKING! Oh wait, thats my email, rofl.
| Sue D. Nym chapter 20 . 2/5/2009
Ack! Massive cliffhanger. But, oh the irony - working so hard, only to realize you've forgotten something terribly important...
You have a very dynamic writing style - the action is well paced and exciting. Even if you seem to enjoy cliffhangers.
| Sue D. Nym chapter 19 . 2/2/2009
This story is so involved...complex...
The characters are believable...
It's really amazing, and you should be proud of this story.
| Master-of-Omega chapter 19 . 1/26/2009
Wow, and the kids at school call ME emo. I'm not emo! God they are so anoying! Just because I wear black and don't talk to them, they think i'm emo! But that just means I like black and don't like them! It dosn't mean i'm emo! ...Wow I got WAY off topic... Oops. Anyway Emo Sera isn't as fun as normal Sera, that's for sure. Hey! Look at the pretty storm cloud! I hope it's friendly! ...I think i'm drunk... lol.