|Reviews for Mental Notes|
| YeahI'mWeirdAndILoveIt chapter 1 . 10/29/2012
Awesome story, it really does seem like these are things she would say!
| Yay chapter 1 . 9/13/2010
Amusing, well written, you captured the essence of Ashe's character, however the whole 'I annoy myself' bit was a tad OoC.
| Nilmiel chapter 1 . 4/4/2008
Haha, I loved it! It was great- I loved getting insight into all things Ashe. I think that maybe you should do another one in which she lists nice things about everyone- just as a contrast. (And yes, I know I'm late reviewing this by about half a year.)
| CrissCrossedHaiku chapter 1 . 1/29/2008
I just lol-ed out loud at work. D
| Airemir chapter 1 . 1/2/2008
FINALLY! /SOMEONE/ [other than me] NOTICED THAT GIANT TURTLES AND PLANT FIENDS ARE OVERRATED!
AND THE SOLIDOR'S HAIR! That /really/ bothered me for so long.
OMG, do you know the first thing I think about whenever I remember this story?
"That's not a /skirt/, that's a /belt/, and don't you think flourescent pink attracts more monsters?"
And to be honest, I have to agree with Vaan /Ratsbane/ over there. You know what the first thing I noticed about Ashe? She was rude. And her skirt. Seriously, that color should NEVER have seen the light of DAY, never mind night. If a girl that needs glasses as badly as I do can see THAT monstrosity, the fiends would have no problem spotting HER a mile away.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Now where in Ivalice did you hear about this Dalmascan delicacy? Because that sounds strangely a /lot/ like squid. Which I absolutely (abhore) by the way. Have you /seen/ those things? Nastiness. [Which is not even a word, but work with me here.]
WHAT is with Square Enix's strange obsessions with giant fiends? Do we NOT have ENOUGH problems getting rid of all the packs of miniature whatever-the-hell-they-are? And a giant turtle? WTF? Personally, I never like turtles, so I had no problems killing a giant one. Especially since it WAS trying to kill me. It just really vexes me. Why a giant turtle? And don't even get me STARTED on those giant plant fiends. They look like some cheap knockoff from all those ancient sci-fi movies. I mean really, that WON'T get you points for originality, you know.
I love chocobos! KWEH! But I remember seeing a scene in FFX where the chocobo knights were rushing to the shore to kill the sin spawn. All I could think of was "Gee, the chocobos looks so shiny." Yeah, and you know the best way to put fear in the hearts of fiends? Chocobo riding knights. HA! Right, as if.
What do you mean a potholder? What potholder? I didn't notice any potholder on Basch's person. Can you explain that to me?
I know, Fran's armor is just so discombobulating, isn't it? It looks like some guy's kinky fantasy. Of course, with the name of the game and all, I wouldn't be surprised if it was. And I wouldn't be surprised how many boys [even MEN] have HER as their leading lady in their fantasies NOW.
And Balthier the metrosexual. Trust me, I have seen FAR worst than a man wearing multi-colored rings. Have you ever seen one wear a mesh shirt? (*shudders in fright*) And the HAIR. Man, the products he must need to get it LIKE that must cost a FORTUNE.
Vaan's clothing, or lack thereof, always did manage to get me perplexed. Doesn't metal get HOT in the desert? And what, if any, protection does wearing it like THAT give you?
The Judges. Boy, the Judges. When I first saw them, I didn't even think they were HUMAN, never mind elite warriors of an empire.
If the house of Solidor's only noticed that the only one who could manage to pull of the girly hair look was their youngest son, well, then I'd bet they'd probably all be cutting off those dark locks. Geez, Vayne looks like Nooj when he lets his hair down. Except shorter.
Ok, enough with me venting out my flummoxed feelings. I just have to say that this note is totally awesome, and that you did great work. Keep it up!
| Touch of Gray chapter 1 . 12/10/2007
That last one absolutely killed me. The chocobos have to be the cutest things in the whole world of Final Fantasy, and they're used to ride into battle on? Please. That's like saddling Big Bird and running into war. Terrifying.
This was hilarious!
| Vixen2004 chapter 1 . 10/24/2007
This is what you must do, and this is how you must do it.
1) Open a Microsoft Word Document
2) Type an original piece of some sort, perferbly in English, and coherent form, complete with an epic story line and hints of subtle humor
3) Send it off to a publisher
4) Await the Nobel Peace Prize For Comedy and an entourage of fans
I mean, REALLY.
I am a blunt person by nature, and if I hate something, I usually say it, but this was WONDERFUL. Probably one of the most humerous pieces on FFNET all together. No, I'm not exagerating.
You managed to capture hilarity while all the while maintaining the 'posh' air that permeates FFXII (and Ashe in general, for that matter.) I think this was revolutionary. And I am SUCH a sucker for list format. Like, you have no idea.
Aside from the fact you are one of the few who are genuinely FUNNY, your vernacular was commendable, as well as your characterization, word choice, and enlightening sentence structure.
Though the diction and stream of conciousness were my favorites.
Balthier: "Fran, they're dead. And it is not as if they were capable of particularly enlightening thought berfore hand either."
Or something along those lines. I probably butchered it heniously, but you get the idea.
Oh, and Balthier plus brothels? A bucket of win. Seriously.
And Vaan. With his metal. I never noticed that.
"...and Basch on a /chocobo/ with a /potholder/..."
I'd pick out more favorites, but I'd just end up quoting the entire composition. Perhaps it would be better if I simply copied and pasted.
Or just told you the entire thing was pure awesome.
And I am glad I am not the only one confounded by Penelo's leather tendancies while venturing amidst a desert.
| CombustibleSpaghetti chapter 1 . 10/23/2007
Ahahaha! Hilarious! You actually made me laugh a couple of times, which is a rare occurance when I'm reading fanfictions. I love how you've pointed out many of the players' debates and speculations in this, especially since it's in Ashe's perspective.
It's about time that the Final Fantasy XII fandom get a decent humorous piece!
Oh, and I especially loved the "Basch on a chocobo with a potholder" part.
| Akasa chapter 1 . 10/23/2007
Ashe's tone sounds a little too sarcastic and bored than she really is. But I liked that you added in the end that this was her attempt at being funny. It was a very amusing read and interesting concept. Great job on your first FFXII fic, and I hope to see more from you.
"I do wonder how he walks without squeaking.…" won me over.
| Sita 900 chapter 1 . 10/23/2007
"I do wonder how he walks without squeaking." LOL!
and balthier and brothels. XD
andI loved number 20. penelo is insane for befriending Vaan.
and 22. Basch on a chocobo with a potholder! hahahaha I love that.
I liked it... something I can picture Ashe writing about in a journal or something. I would definitely like to see you do another one!