Reviews for Something Hentai This Way Comes
firebluebird2006 chapter 2 . 3/13
so you abandoned this story
Sean Malloy-1 chapter 2 . 12/18/2015
Sorry about your friend, but a new story doesn't mean you have to cancel an old one. Any idea when you might update "Nindo of the Force"?
Ranmachanisme2 chapter 2 . 12/8/2015
LOL Too funny
:)
The Keeper of Worlds chapter 2 . 12/6/2015
Cool:). And my condolences to you for your friend
irnzenmonk chapter 1 . 8/2/2013
interesting ne
Ranmaleopard chapter 1 . 2/13/2012
this is really awesome and interesting i cant wait to see what happens next please continue!
chm01 chapter 1 . 5/18/2011
so any chance for an update soon?
Ganheim chapter 1 . 4/14/2009
Prologue

for hence forth thou

[The ‘for’ doesn’t look necessary]

Chapter 1

performed misogi, sprinkling water on the walkway towards her house at this time of day to wash away sin from her front steps.

[That ‘time of day’ always seems to be when he’s passing by]

when Onna-Ranma

[Unnecessary Japanese (it’s also miscapitalized, and probably would serve better as a suffix than prefix)]

having her okāsan around

[Unnecessary Japanese: we got the point at first, but there’s no reason to replace ‘mother’ with ‘okaasan’ every single time]

oyagi, which was an impolite way of saying “father”,

[While true, it’s still unnecessary Japanese]

the lazy baka

[Unnecessary Japanese]

She stepped through the threshold beneath the noren, a short curtain found hanging in the entrances to restaurants,

[Interesting, but unnecessary. I feel more like I’m reading a cultural orientation than a fanfic]

chopping a large white daikon, a kind of white squash.

[Also difficult to cook into a good meal, but for whatever reason squash of all sorts never seems to be cooperative when I’m trying to cook it]

“Ara, welcome

[Unnecessary Japanese]

“A ... Arigato. Uh, where's okāsan?”

[Unnecessary Japanese]

her reluctant iinazuke

[Unnecessary Japanese. Guess what? When you stick with the main story language, you make the story easier to read for the audience. Gasp! What a concept!]

get a bath. Ja.”

[Unnecessary Japanese]

noticed him. “Konbanwa,

[Unnecessary Japanese]

“Tadaima!” came Akane's

[Unnecessary Japanese]

from the genkan, the place were you leave your shoes by the front door.

[Unnecessary Japanese]

“Okerineesai!” Nabiki answered welcome.

[Unnecessary Japanese]

“Hai.” Akane nodded

[Unnecessary Japanese]

“Ara. Where did

[Unnecessary Japanese]

since her baka son

[Unnecessary Japanese]

Daisuke.” he told

[A comma for transition to the direct speech tag would serve better than the period creating a full stop]

Oyagi had been

[Unnecessary Japanese]

i a raspy voice.

[in]

Its the only answer.”

[It’s]

Its time he

[It’s]

“Arigato ... otōsan.”

[Unnecessary Japanese]

Kuno Tatawaki

[Tatewaki]

The baka couldn't

[Unnecessary Japanese]

How the bokuto wielding baka

[Unnecessary Japanese]

kawaiikun

[Unnecessary Japanese]

somethings going on with him.”

[something’s]

and said, “Hai.”

[Unnecessary Japanese]

“Arigato-gosaimasu,

[Unnecessary Japanese]

Historical and cultural research done in “Japanese Culture” by Paul Varley, University of Hawaii Press, ISBN 0-8248-2152-1.

[Your recommendation points to a good book, but while you’re at least explaining/expanding on the terms instead of just unceremoniously jamming them into the story, it’s still awkward.]
Jigoku no Yami chapter 1 . 5/30/2008
You must update. Please. I want to see what Ranma will do when he snaps...A lot of females are gonna be sore, thats for sure.
Ranmawho1 chapter 1 . 11/24/2007
XD This story is hilarious! (and very well written) Please continue, I don't wanna see a story this funny fall to the way-side.
King of Darkness chapter 1 . 11/23/2007
Very, very nice.
Sdarian chapter 1 . 11/12/2007
While this looks pretty good, I'm curious as to how you'll continue it. While I do hope to read more, it really seems to be going in the direction of major lemon. While I enjoy those too, they don't care too much for them here on Anyway, good luck!
DCWestby chapter 1 . 11/5/2007
Good start. Keep going.
Ten-Faced Paladin chapter 1 . 11/5/2007
Ranma is in serious trouble. That's all I can say. Update soon.
Unknowing chapter 1 . 10/28/2007
Nice setup so far, can't wait to see where you take this.
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