Reviews for Hesitant Return
Royal chapter 9 . 8/20
Ah, what a lovely chapter and lovely story! You're very talented, and such a sweet person in your author notes! The world needs more people like you. 3
craftybookworm25 chapter 22 . 6/1
I really liked this story. It had be at the end of my seat the entire time, although that could also be because I needed to pee for the last 2 hours. Really it was a great story and I think you have given it justice. I hope you continue to write more stories later on. You're a great author and I genuinely hope that you haven't given up on writing.
Umbra.Crystal chapter 22 . 5/15
I was surprised to find how enthralled I became when I finished reading the third chapter. I seriously couldn't put my phone down even though I had to study for exams. Eventually, I ended up sleeping at three in the morning, with a smile of content on my face for managing to read the whole fanfic in one day. Oh well XP. And being both an overly enthusiastic reader and a procrastinator when you're supposed to devote your time to studying and only studying is a bad combination. But, I somehow managed, so huray! XD.
ZekiWing chapter 13 . 4/23
I kinda wanted to know how Ed would kill himself. (Gun, alchemy, or something else)
The Chubber chapter 1 . 11/30/2015
Really interesting, but PLEASE USE CONSISTENT VERB TENSES! Other than that, it's a great story! :)
ShinichiKudoOwnsMySoul chapter 18 . 10/5/2015
Rorsy chapter 22 . 9/9/2015
No, guns don't kill people. People with mustaches kill people.
Rorsy chapter 20 . 9/9/2015







The trick worked! D:
ShinichiKudoOwnsMySoul chapter 22 . 9/3/2015
Are you ever going to update this?
StevetheCat chapter 4 . 7/30/2015
Transition from scenes is choppy and confusing. Focus on clearly cutting the different scenes from each other and when beginning a new scene, introduce the setting, area and time. Also, when switching p.o.v it confused me for a few seconds and I had to really think to finally grasp the situation. Make it more defined. Plot great though!
Guest chapter 4 . 7/27/2015
You rule
3vilPurpl3d0t chapter 2 . 7/9/2015
It's more of a cruel irony that Ed was brought down by something as simple as one bullet to the chest from protecting a mother, while he had gone against bigger foes and survived. But it was a good choice. His death was not senseless, and you wrote it well, so don't feel down on how Full Metal went down. For you could say he went out with a bang.
Ravenclaw667 chapter 22 . 6/25/2015
Is there a sequel? Please let there be a sequel!
Guest chapter 4 . 6/17/2015
Elise chapter 22 . 6/5/2015
Ha ha I sort of feel like one of your chapters without a long authors note is akin to Armstrong without his sparkles :P (not meant in an offensive way, I love that man!)
I'm so glad Winry and Ed kissed! I'm still mad this didn't happen in the manga or anime...
I admit I'm a little disappointed about the ending... Sorry about that :/ I just feel Ed's explanation about Truth and his reasoning behind not revealing himself could have been more explicit and satisfactory for his friends and brother. I would not let him get off so easily if I was one of them! And it was a little hectic. But! I liked your explanation about equivalent exchange, nicely done ;) and also Ed's long "awakening" in his grave.
I understand you haven't put your heart into this as you say, I think that's a pity, this could have been brilliant instead of just good. I'm really not trying to dishearten you, I just think you can do much better if you organise the storyline beforehand. You have a nice style, and the inner thoughts are well done, the main areas for improvement are the plot, and descriptions (you could add more of those!)
Thanks for uploading, I did enjoy this ;)
I hope you find new inspiration and write an awesome fanfic! :D
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