|Reviews for Winter's Flowers|
| i-Spit-on-Fire chapter 38 . 12/4/2014
I love it! I waited until I had read all three of these stories before I commented because I was being lazy and didnt want to sign in. Anyway I loved them all and how wonderful and happy the story was and just. It just made me so happy! However I do have one thing I was not happy about. There were times you copy and pasted parts of the story and just left it there and didnt fix the POV. Like when Martin and Rose were are the pond/river/thing when they were reunited. You have the kiss always from Rose's POV even though it should have been Martins. I know its a 3rd person POV story but it just feels out of context and weird. I believe you did that a few more times. That was the only thing I found wrong about it. I loved the rest of it and the poems were some of my favorite parts. You did a wonderful job and I thank you for sharing it with the world!
| Auua Ytjoml chapter 11 . 5/26/2014
I'm not so keen on the "bringing everybody back" bit. Bringing Rose back is one thing. She is a big "what if" that changes tons of things. But bringing more than one dead character back in the same story arc? I hope you're not planning on bring Boar or Skipper's brother or others back as well.
| Auua Ytjoml chapter 10 . 5/26/2014
an exciting setup... I can't wait for the next chapter! (and in fact I won't!)
| Auua Ytjoml chapter 9 . 5/26/2014
The flashback was rather underwhelmingly cheesy although I did think Martin asking Rose if it would be to forward just to ask for a kiss was perfect and very in character.
| Auua Ytjoml chapter 7 . 5/26/2014
you're mole speak is right on par (don't have a book with me so I can't compare it to cannon but it seems authentic without being distracting so...)
And I absolutely loved the tone, language, and set up of Brome's speech!
| Auua Ytjoml chapter 6 . 5/26/2014
this whole allpack secrecting away hordes of maidens thing is reminding me of either a dragon tale or an indian haram
| Auua Ytjoml chapter 4 . 5/26/2014
You're girl talk was great! though I wouldn't use chick-flicks as inspiration. most of them are horrible characetured.
| Rock Raider chapter 38 . 9/7/2013
My, but that was quite the read. It was nice that Martin got to have the happy ending he never got in the canon, and you did a good job of making sure it didn't contradict anything IN Jaques' stories. Good job,
I will say I thought it sad that Rose decided to be buried in Noonvale. I mean, sure, it keeps your story from contradicting the Redwall canon, but still, you'd think she'd want to be buried with Martin in his tomb.
Also, interesting idea on making Matthias related to Brome. I suppose it gives Matthias some closure about his family, and I imagine he might find it interesting that he has a tangential connection to Martin. I wonder what the rest of the Abbey would think.
Also, nice idea regarding The Allpack. It seems the wolves are now one of three different types of beasts in the world of Redwall (unofficially) to have more than one alignment.
You know, I recently had a thought regarding Giana the ottermaid that The Allpack was holding in their valley. I didn't know if she had a family back home who was worried about her, or a husband who was looking for her (or if he was chastised by The Allpack when he found her and attempted to rescue her), so I had the thought of her being paired with Skipper from Redwall. Of course, it's too late to do that in this story, it was just a thought I had.
I think I've run out of stuff to talk about, so I'll finish off by saying this was a good story. Anyway, see you.
| Thespurgin chapter 38 . 9/20/2012
what... did you just in one chapter explain all the stuff I couldn't get from the book?
Did you just imply that Matthias is descended from Brome?
Did you just spit on Sturgeon's Law?
You did... You are Awesome.
| Thespurgin chapter 35 . 9/20/2012
For too long I had waited for this... the happy ending Martin and Rose deserved.
When I first read Martin the Warrior, I loved it. I devoured every chapter page by page. I couldn't be STOPPED. It was all I thought about for a while, I'll be honest.
The plot of intricate and littered with sanguine tears and petals of laughter. An incredible journey truly a worthy predecessor to the events of Mossflower and, in the far future, Redwall. My heart sang.
Then Rose died. I'll be honest, when I read it, I was young, and it felt like someone had staked my through the heart with a branding iron and twisted. It, and the remainder of the book was emotionally so shocking that I wanted to leap into the story, to change it, to do SOMETHING to cheat that hideous fate. It was monstrous, unfair, WRONG... Then the Legend of Luke came out. It put me marginally at ease with Martin's character, I'll be honest, but I still dreamt in my heart that Jacques would one day make it right... that there really could be a happier ending for Martin then the one he got... the ending he deserved, yet could still remain canon to the wallverse.
I hoped, even prayed, I think, as more and more books by my favorite author came out. Marlfox, Taggerung, Long Patrol, Triss... Each one I loved, but in truth they still held an invisible stain on my heart for what they reminded me of. Martin's loss... a rose gone before it's time. I held to the hope that Jacques would do something, as much as I knew somehow that he may never have intended it any differently.
That optimistic, hopeful dream was shattered like glass when I heard he passed on. I drove myself to read his last books, praying... but no. That was around two years ago I think. I haven't read my Redwall collection since, and my copy of Martin the Warrior? It hurt to even look at it.
Then I got into fanfiction. I got into Neon Genesis Evangelion fanfics, hoping the hideous ending of the show and movie could be repaired, and I was not disappointed. Then I got into MLP fanfics.
Absently, I wandered TVTropes one day, and pulled up the tropes page on Redwall, out of nostalgia. That was when I saw the fanfic recs subpage. I bookmarked it, thinking I might find story that might kindle my desire to read of mice and badgers and otters... of great adventures, cruel vermin, malign creatures, and heroism... of battle, love, and of overcoming fear and growing into an adult. That link sat in my browser's folders for a long time, to my shame... at least three months.
Two days ago, I wandered back there, since I'd grown bored of writing and needed a balm to my nerves. I don't know if that was the only reason, or if perhaps God subtly directed me there... but in the end, I can only assume such. I scrolled for a while, and noticed that only one story fell under the recommended romance fics... a story called "A Mask and a Song" and it's sequel, "Winter's Flowers."
I read the description, and it was... different from when I did so before. When I first bookmarked the webpage with the recs, I glanced at the listings... and this one didn't sound particularly interesting. I felt insulted that someone dared think they could write a good romance in redwall setting between canon characters, one of which held the place as the most costly sacrifice and painful loss I ever felt impale my soul. I was annoyed, to put it mildly... but yesterday, I looked again, and saw no reason why not to give it a chance. Now here I am writing this length and undoubtly over-thought-out post (I apologize for that BTW) and telling you this long story of my own.
Okay, long story short... I started this expecting to drop it after the first chapter. I came EXPECTING to be disappointed. Imagine my shock when I found it in no way as bad as I had expected. It wasn't incredible per say, but it had the true form of a Redwall tale. I found myself thinking that if this were a published tome, I would probably be hunting for it instead of trying to understand why I thought it was even "okay." So I read on, and I found myself unable to put the fic down, as I used to be with my old redwall books. My mom had to kick me off to stop me from finishing the first fic in one night.
So I slept, and awoke, and went to work, and this fic sat in the back of my mind and marinated in my subconscious. I had to find out what happened next. It was driving me nuts. I returned tonight to finish the fic, and dove into the sequel. I was up on cloud nine. While the first fic lacked the length or true vastness of a jacques book, it held the hope I had thought long dead with the author. It is currently 1 AM on thursday morning as I type this, and I should sleep, but I couldn't without getting this off my chest.
You did it. I am practically crying as I type, though from joy or closure I know not what.
The fic is slightly rough. It has plenty of shout outs, something most fanfics have. It doesn't have the numerous viewpoints and simultaneously playing storylines of Jacques's finest works, and you dropped Willic and the Eagles in out of nowhere in a manner not unlike a Deus Ex Plot Device... but I can't really be mad at you for that. The OCs were a mixture of funny, heartwarming, and sad all at once. Sirius made me mad and the story of the Rambling Rosehip Players' deaths wrenched my heart, Willic and Krysti's love, for all it's compressed nature, made me smile.
It's true this isn't a book my Brian Jacques. I doubt anyone could ever imitate him perfectly to be frank, but that's not the point. This is by far the darn closest story to the spirit of the source-series' original author I have ever read, and I've read at least 15 million words of fanfiction spread out over more than 500 stories in the year since I started reading fanfiction again, and this holds a special place in my heart.
This isn't a new BJ book. I know that. I don't think you truly WANTED that, as much as you strove for it. I will tell you what you achieved in my eyes though... you fulfilled a wide-eyed boy's forgotten pray. You pulled the thorn in my heart that always stung when I read a Redwall Book. I can read Martin the Warrior now, and think of this fic with hope. This isn't just headcanon for me now, it's a Dogma; a paradigm shift. With this, Redwall changes for me back into the story I read as a boy, those many years ago.
I know all this is probably the sappiest thing I've ever written, and I have no shame in that. All I wish to say now is thank you. Thank you for bringing me the closure I gave up on finding... for stitching that wound in a young boy's soul. I would propose as much as mailing a transcript of this to BJ's son asking him if it might be considered for publishing, with a bit of polish and filigree. Why? threefold reasons.
Firstly, because I'm a greedy little rat that wants to be able to grasp a published text of this story to hand down to my children, and they to theirs, in the same manner as I would pass down the Redwall books I hold dear to my heart.
The second reason is less... selfish you could say. Why would I to see this become a book? Because I want Others that might have suffered the same wound I did to find this... and for their hearts to be balmed as well.
Third and finally, I wish this was published just to show that Redwall, as a series, is not over. No... that it is never over. As long as people remember it, and those artists that love it and it's author's memory exist... as long as stories like this are forged from the dreams and hopes of the children and adults that were touched by his works, Redwall is not dead.
I say a final time...
Thank you, Warrior4, for this. I have nothing more I can say.
| Fell's Apprentice chapter 38 . 9/9/2012
I only have a couple problems with this story: One, Martin would be to humble to wear a cape. Two, I think that Restro should have been the one to kill Lupisto. other than that (and I'm sure you have good reasons for both), this story was fantastic.
| RLC chapter 16 . 7/9/2012
Much better! I see you're getting back on your feet.
Four things for ya:
1. Select two or three vermin, and work on them like you do Rose and Martin. Trust me on this. Mr. Jacques did it too.
2. Ease up on your story. Make a goofy troublemaker. Mr. Jacques lightened serious stories with clown-like characters.
3. Read Pride and Predjudice if you want a mushy part of the tale. Jane Austin made classic romance stories without sensualization.(I think i spelled it right. In short, no sex like you've been doing it)
4. BE DESCRIPTIVE! Painting a picture with words made Mr. Jacques famous. Put yourself in his shoes. Imagine your story will be read to blind people.
| RLC chapter 15 . 7/9/2012
This chapter was the most uncanon (if that's even a word). I'm not saying it's impossible, but it sure stretches the truth to its limits.
You also had more spelling and punctuation errors in this one than all of your other chapters. I'll show some grace since you're sick, but keep an eye open, and edit your work carefully.
(couldn't fit "Redwall loving Christian" in the name slot, so RLC will have to do)
One more thing, ease up a bit. I really like Redwall because even in times of trouble, there's always some goof lighening up the mood. So far, your story is all heartbreak.
| Redwall loving Christian chapter 13 . 6/7/2012
No problem with the commitee gathering. But it really wasn't a mystery.
1 Corinthians 13:2
| Redwall loving Christian chapter 8 . 5/26/2012
That was downright cruel to do that at the end of a chapter! But I loved it, anyway.
You're doing a great job, but something I can't put my finger on still bugs me. I'll find it later.