I really want to join the Bella haters. Loved it. You're hilarious.

I wanna job the Bella Hater Club

this is better than breaking dawn to be honest.
i mean stephanie was just like, "well, if jake can't be with his first choice he might as well be with her daughter."
that is fucked up.

I WANNA JOIN THE BELLAS HATERS!- STEOHANIE FUCKED UP THE WHOLE DFEINITION OF VAMPIRES THAT BITCH!

L

The Bella Haters of the Universe just got one more member!

OMG CAN I JOIN THE BELLA HATERS OF THE UNIVERSE!sept 17 is my new favourite holiday and yes Edward is most definately gay

Please let me join * does lopsided puppy dog face *

Ummm ok... "No one" "Somebody" whatever your name is u wrote so many things that I lost after 12. If your trying to be a ** than its not working because

' reason 1. Its so long people would be like ** you I am NOT gonna read all this and reason 2. She didn't ask for all your **iness and its a free country leave het alone '

Please let me join * does lopsided puppy dog face *

OMG! How do I join the BHOTU? I kinda hate Bella for being self-conscious, shy, annoyingly nice, passive, boring, too nice, lame, too nice (did I already say that), never speaks up for herself, and thinks that Edward doesn't deserve her (ummm...then he wouldn't be dating you. Duh.) and for playing with two guys hearts. So...GO BELLA HATERS! WOOH!

fave part: All of the Cullens plus Jacob exchanged glances and coughed.

Carlisle: Uh, right, now who wants to stop at the Subway over there?

Alice jumped up, “Hell yeah, I’m gonna get a five dollar foot long!”

Jacob: You can have THIS five dollar foot long, if you want…

Everyone: Dude, no.

They all begin to walk away, but a spaceship beams them all up first, Bella was sucking blood through a straw.

Jacob: OMC, what the hell are you doing?

Bella: Drinkin’ blood, bitch, whatsit to you?

Jacob: Uh, why?

Bella: It makes me feel kick-ass, you ought to try it.

Edward: Cool! This UFO is like space camp all over again!

Alice: This is the SHIT! It’s like E.T. except this isn’t crappy ‘80s special effects!

They all begin to explore the mysterious spaceship.

Jacob: OMC, they have a vibrating room!

Alice: Dude, no…

haha. yea um this chappie was prtty screwed up...gangs and smoking ISN'T badass and it's not cool...

wa ha ha! my fave part: Bella: OMC, screw them both! They’re SUPPOSED to be fighting over me, not going on some mega-hot dream vacation to the tropics together! THAT’S NOT HOW THIS STORY GOES! This writer’s a total bitch!

Yes, Bella, but I’m afraid that Edward and Jacob in a one-bedroom condo together is what most fangirls would prefer to see, rather than just pointless arguments between them, usually centering you. THIS IS FANFICTION! STEPHANIE MEYER HAS NO POWER HERE!

lol! haha i HATE the name Renesmee too. i mean i know it's an anagram. my name is an angram of my parents' names but mine ends in "Shanna" and it sounds semi-normal and cute! haha. good job!

wa ha ha! funny! my fave part: Ivy suddenly screamed, “AH! It’s HOT! I’m burning up!”

Kids: “WTF?

“Well,” the teacher said, “It looks like Ivy is going through menopause.”

“EW! NASTY! That means she’s like fifty, right?”

Ivy: “Damn, I’m found out…”

Jacob: “I imprinted on a fifty-year-old?”

(un-imprints.)

Peanut Gallery: “Uh, is that possible?”

(Another ploy by the author.)

Teacher: “Young man, you don’t attend this school!”

Jacob shoots the teacher.

“It’s okay, Ivy, we’ll put you in a nursing home!”

“Oh, thanks.”

aw i thought Jakerz was gonna get his happy ending with Ivy! ah well...funny stuff! would u consider doing a collab with me?

whoopsie srry i'm not logged in! haha SIGN ME UP! I HATE BELLA! and i luv, luv, luv, luv, luv, luv, luv, LUV that Jake got his happy ending that wasn't with Bella or Renesmee! oh my fave part: “I’m please—I mean sorry to say that Bella had been killed by, uh, a herding stampede of buffalo.” He said, faking sadness.

They all looked at Edward to see his reaction.

“Uh.. Oh! What a tragedy!” he exclaimed with even worse fake sadness, “On a happier note, my new girlfriend shall be…” he looked around randomly. Rosalie and Emmett ducked out of his view. “YOU!” he shouted to Dumbledore and started making out with him.

rofl hilarious! haha i AM a member of this site u can search me u'm just not logged in...ok BYE! Team Jacob, Team Taylor baby!

“RELEASE THE HOUNDS!” Jasper screamed, and fifty rabid dogs attacked Edward and gave him rabies, which is the only thing that can kill vampires, so Edward died, too.

“Thank god.”

“Let’s all go to McDonalds.”

hahahahahaa I love Twilight but OMG THIS IS BRILLIANT! That is something I would say, someone would die n I'd be like, hm lets all go to McDonalds! Love this it's awesome!