|Reviews for Enlightenment|
| Wonderbee31 chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
Nice, and interesting to see Umbridge on Harry's side, even if it is just to get Albus, who dug his own grave unfortunately. Goin to be fun to see who plans win out for the end of the year, though Ron seems to be getting Homer dumb now, LOL.
| dennisud chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
Umbridge 'Helping" Potter alone is worth a look see on the next few chapters.
Course Luicius getting involved is always NOT good!
Nice change from the norm!
| malko050987 chapter 23 . 12/29/2007
Sorry, but this is where I'm dropping this. You're basically turning it all into a summary. "They did this. They did that. She said that. He felt that."
That's too much Tell and not enough Show. Give us dialogue where they do things. Add some dialogue to scenes, like the one with the scores. Instead of telling us that they were nervous, show us. Even a small thing, like
"Harry's hands were sweating slightly as he pried open the envelope with the scores, and he glances hesitantly at Hermione. He didn't want to disappoint her, after all the help she'd already given him. Afraid to open the envelope himself, he thrust it at Hermione, giving her a pleading look.
Hermione opened the envelope, glanced at the titles and grinned widely at him. "Congratulations, Harry!" she said, hugging him tightly."
It would add a lot more feeling to the story than what you did.
| hpnut1 chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
The last two were GREAT and I can't wait for the "dung" to hit the fan! Keep it up!
| Sociopathic-Antichrist chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
Lovely so far!
Typo's and grammatical error's here and there, but every story has those.
This is truly an intriguing story!
Write more now! :D
| xXDeidara-chanXx chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
Two brilliant chapters
I like this story even better now (and that means something)
| pstibbons chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
Glad Harry isn't jumping at the opportunity to go to the Bones'. Hope the Jeffries agree to make Harry Sara's official little brother.
And where's Hermione going to get a kitchen to make said mean lasagna?
If Ron approached Hermione for tutoring help, would she agree? Even if he treated her badly during the tutoring sessions, would she be guilt tripped into keeping them going so he doesnt get kicked out of school? And how are Seamus' grades? And will Ron get a better education at home?
Surprised Malfoy hasn't thought of a plot to eliminate Hermione and/or her parents yet.
| pstibbons chapter 23 . 12/29/2007
“Thank you Harry. I really enjoyed that. The flying wasn’t bad either.”
Lots of great stuff, and the Harmony was nice too.
I liked McG's talk with HErmione, but it wasnt clear how watching HArry's back could best be done. Does it mean inventing better shields for him to use? Actively being in battle with him? Communications devices so that she can warn him about where the enemy is while she's at a remote location? Making sure he doesn't get dissed by the media by getting Luna to be his official spokesman?
Ah, and the Patronus. Sweet.
Loved Luna's duel with Cho. Hopefully it won't be just Cho who won't be harassing Luna again in Ravenclaw.
| Bluesnowman chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
Great stuff so far.
| SeulWolfe chapter 24 . 12/29/2007
this is awesome.. the angle where Dumbledore diverted the letters from Remus to Harry.. was something I never thought of..
can we Keep Severus good.. just being controlled by Albus..
Lucius could go over to the good side too :D
| lycus chapter 22 . 12/28/2007
I absolutely love this story, you are an incredable writer and I really can't wait for the next chapter. And I just wanted to say thank you for having harry improve himself so much, you have done something that JKR should have done namely getting rid of ron and having a loyal male best friend in neville, and having harry and hermione end up together. And as for your story I really hope that harry gives ginny his nimbus ron doesn't deserve it. And the scenes with sara were brilliant, and it made me wonder if one of saras' friends is a pink haired woman in the auror training program. And I am really trying to figure out how the meeting between sirius and harry is going to play out. And on one final note I hope that you make the story have multiple years in it.
| rasul chapter 1 . 12/27/2007
good story so far. keep up the good work. update soon.
| Gallicka chapter 22 . 12/27/2007
wonderful story! more please!