Reviews for Tessa's Date and Next Day
Grey Wolf4 chapter 1 . 6/28/2012
This is a great Tessa/OC and this is quite well written and the characters were very well presented. Tessa is among my favorite characters though my prime favorite is Melissa Mao.
gunman chapter 1 . 12/31/2010
The first thing I noticed was the lack of space-dividers and something/anything to divide the different scenes in the story. In particular at the end when everyone is having sex.

I mean the scenes kind of ran together it was hard to distinguish them. From Daniel/Tess having sex, to Tony and Mei, to Sosuke and Kaname.

The OC's needed to be well identified.

Ultimately, the story was good, but it could have been better if you had kept various things separate instead of running them together, and some extra details couldn't hurt.

Maybe you could have divided this into three chapters: start with Sosuke's poiunt of view, then maybe Tony and Mei's POV, and then finished it with Tessa's and Daniel's POV.

Just my opinion.

Write on!
Kirinthor chapter 1 . 2/28/2010
great story, i lvoe kaname and souske fics, their such a great pair :D

well done
Extra Gone chapter 1 . 10/17/2008
I liked this story quite a lot, especially since Tessa finally got someone to love. _
Malbec chapter 1 . 12/16/2007
Your story is freaking amazing! I love it! It's so different! I'm also writing a story, and I'd really love it if you could tell me what you think. You're one of my main inspirations! I'd love it even more if you could review my fanfic as well!
94saturn chapter 1 . 12/5/2007
The story is pretty good. One thing that I’m noticing is that you use people’s names a lot in conversations. I have been trying to avoid that lately to make the dialog more natural. Think of it this way. When you talk to someone you don’t repeat their name because you are speaking to them directly.

I had to chuckle at the restaurant scene because I like to do that too. A twenty-dollar tip would be about 2,200 yen, it is Tokyo after all.

The citric content was well done, you took it to the edge without crossing the line. You may have used ‘blow the load’ excessively but it’s not a big deal.

All in all a good story.

Dale (AKA 94saturn)