|Reviews for Fifteen Ways To Make Your Prince RememberYouExist!|
| raindropcatcher chapter 13 . 12/21/2013
You won’t believe me – I’m back again! Anne and Gil were tormenting me today and I needed a break! I loved her dreams. The second one was SO beautiful. Ok, it got very heartbreaking but just the scenery and the situation… I imagined them often be this way back then… That was truly beautiful.
And then Toki came to Usa’s (almost wrote Anne! xD xD) rescue and I was all clapping hands and grinning pancake! ;D I could kiss him too! No really, I COULD! And his “HEY!” I mean once Motoki (!) raises his voice, you sure get goosebumps! I GOT! But why didn’t you stop heeeeeeeeeeer?
I feel so sorry for Usa. The way you describe everything I can really feel how she is torn apart by everyone and everything inside her…
And a squeal left my mouth when I realized that he was already in the park too while talking to her via phone!
Then their I’m-better-than-you-dancing-pu-lease-blushing-moment. Sigh.
Usa is silencing him with her hand! And once again I have to think how perfect they fit as friends for Anne and Gil! O
God… “You look beautiful… the way you are”. Alright, It’s official – I’m a puddle. And Usa – just grab and kiss him and he will remember!
“When you’re civil, not MUD SLINGING” Hello! I can’t believe you wrote that before we knew each other! xD
“He’s my brother from another mother” this chapter is such a Toki-chapter and I love it all the more for that!
I thought they would kiiiiss… boy… But of course then your lovely story would be over!
| Kasienda chapter 23 . 12/16/2013
This has been absolutely delightful! I tore through it in two days!
I really appreciate that this is about season 2. There are so many Season 2 fics (which I admittedly love), but this stands out for having a rarer subject matter. I love that you developed the loneliness that would accompany your friends forgetting the life changing experiences you shared together. In fact, you probably could have spread this out for longer for some of them. I especially thought that Ami and Rei were going to take longer, but no worries. And you developed Ann and Alan beautifully as well. In the show these interactions were repetitive and tiresome, but you manage to avoid this completely by changing the scenario and the different kinds of torture.
I also really appreciate your medium of expression - how everything was expressed through diary, text messages, and work journals. Again, its a creative and unique way of telling your story.
The development of Darien and Serena's relationship was wonderfully paced. It was slow enough that we got the blow by blow as arguing turned into friendly teasing, then playful banter, and then genuine friendship and eventually acknowledged love. But it always moved forward and your reader (at least this one) was always actively engaged. And I love your characterizations of these two! They are so spot on! I LOVE that you expressed the Serena's inner struggle with her three personas (remembering an entire different self would be a crazy thing to have to deal with and definitely would make you doubt who you were as a person) as well as Darien having a really hard time accepting Serena into his life because he thinks he's destined to be with another. I love that you made him accept her before he knew who she was - that's the true way to show that he loves her for who she is now!
Few suggestions for improvement because I want to be helpful and not because anything was actually too detracting:
- Never ever underline the whole chapter. I thought you might be trying to convey that they were writing on lined paper, but it was really strangely distracting for those first few chapters. And since the first few are critical in retaining readers you want them to be as easy to follow.
- There are some diction mistakes throughout this monster where you put in the wrong word. I could always tell what you meant, but sometimes the word you put in meant the exact opposite of what you were trying to convey. Like you would say Darien is conceded (which means he agrees or gives up in an argument) when you meant to say conceited (stuck up, full of himself). Another one that stood out to me was inferno hospital when I think you meant infernal hospital (though this one was kind of amusing as I kept picturing the hospital on fire somewhere in Dante's 9th circle of hell). These mistakes are consistent throughout and something you may want to keep an eye out for in the future when spellcheck is correcting your work.
- Some of the diary entries are repetitive. I don't mind seeing a scene twice from two character's perspectives, but entire chapters is intense sometimes when I'm dying to know what happens next! And there's a few instances when you have a scene in three or four perspectives. If you're going to do this you need to change it up more. Have Darien and Serena remember slightly different parts of the conversation (rather than they both get the full and complete and identical dialogue) or have them remember it slightly differently. If your going to include the scouts' journal or Ann and Alan sacrifice one of the main characters going along with it.
- The comments of all the other seven characters after a scout's entry didn't add much. Sometimes, they could be amusing, but having all seven respond seemed excessive most of the time as they didn't add anything to your story. Just agreed with each other for the most part and occasionally someone would have an idea. It has a group banter to it I suppose, but honestly I found myself skimming through most of these parts.
Anyway, I think that's all I have. Please remember that I loved this even with my suggestions for improvements (and I really don't ever expect you to go back and change anything - just trying to help you improve your writing!). I really did get through it in two days!
Lovely lovely story!
Happy Writing in all future endeavors!
| Jesusfreak15 chapter 23 . 12/12/2013
dude... it's a great ending... not so happy that it had to end but it's really good! and to you i say this...Flees on your dog and merry cat-lice! my dad's punch line not mine :) so early Merry Christmas and a happy new and hopefully fun year :) (f.y.i I don't mind that it's late but dude... it's the thought that counts)
| xxNarielxx chapter 23 . 12/11/2013
Beautiful story :D
| Ashen Author chapter 23 . 12/11/2013
I love that you finally finished this. It was a very powerful and moving ending that characterized their happily ever after perfectly. I wish we'd seen more of the intervening years, though: seeing how the knights and Allan and Ann affecting the Black Moon Clan and Deathbusters, etc. That would have been interesting. Maybe we'll be lucky and get a sequel. or even just a collection of one-shots?
| SerenityShields chapter 23 . 12/11/2013
what a wonderful story! beautiful writing and engaging story line! thank you for sharing!
| Queen of Light 17 chapter 23 . 12/10/2013
Woah. What an amazing ending. I couldn't stop smiling throughout this chapter. I loved seeing them on their first date and I meted at the end with the King looking over the sketches and diary and the Queen sharing some exciting news. I absolutely love this story and will continue to re read it. Thank you so much for writing such an amazing fic and look forward to reading more of your stories in the future.
| missscatterbrain325 chapter 23 . 12/10/2013
Yeay! Thank you for completing this! This is one of the best written SM fiction I've read. I love your writing style, the plot twist, the emotions it tugged out of me, the emotions portrayed by the characters, their banter and interactions with one another. I think you are very talented and hope you keep writing new stories and share them.
P/S: I think this may be my first time reviewing logged in as I didn't have an account until Jan this year but I have kept track of this story since I found it which was a couple of years ago. That says a lot to your talent as I'm usually a very impatient reader! ;) Thanks again!
| kera69love chapter 23 . 12/10/2013
Wow that was super sweet so does it mean that the story is complete. I hope you can continue to write more story's because I like the way you write
| Starrlight1812 chapter 23 . 12/10/2013
Thanks for the shout out. I'm glad you were able to finish writing this, even without the final chapter you had written a wonderful story. I'm sorry to hear about your memaw, its the worst when they leave us, but they will always be here in spirit.
Keep up the fabulous writing, I'm looking forward to your next work of art!
Merry Christmas and hope you have a fabulous 2014!
| tiffany aka basketcase chapter 23 . 12/10/2013
I'm sorry about your loss and I know it could hard to function after such a loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.
I'm happy that we have the finale chapter to such an amazing story. It was a great ending to such an unique story that had never been tried before on FF. I couldn't help but feel sad to say bye to your 'Darien' and 'Serena'.
You really did grown tremendously in your writing from the first chapter and to the end. Thank you for an epic adventure.
| raindropcatcher chapter 12 . 11/23/2013
1. I would have fallen from my chair if I would have been sitting in one at reason 14! xD Usagi! You ninny! And it never occurred to you there’s no need for dismounting his legs but he could simply use his VERY strong arms to lift you up and kiss you as long as he wishes (aka forever)?
2. And reason number 1. Oh my… that tears at my heart! She truly IS in love. That’s because she thinks she doesn’t deserve him, when actually she’s the ONLY ONE who deserves him at all! I know Mamo thinks the same about her too. Memory loss or not. Don’t deny it Mamoru-san!
3. And HOW creepy is Alan with asking her to write her reasons down!? O_o It couldn’t have been grosser if he would have asked her to keep a diary about how she often went to toilet! One doesn’t rummage around in someone’s heart!
4. Mamo-chan on his knees? It’s an ooooooooooooooooomen ;)
5. SailorLeia, you sure are meanie! You write about all those wonderful images Usa-chan is drawing (like the one of Mina and her knight) and now I WANT TO SEEEEE THEM! *pout* _
6. “How are WE doing?” Oh, Mamoru, you’re already one, huh? Huh? *wink* *nudge*
7. Oh my good! Am I a puddle or am I a puddle! I am puddliger than a puddle! How he defends her and then HOLDS her hand! In front of everyone! GO MAMO-CHAN! BE HER KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOUR!
| raindropcatcher chapter 9 . 11/14/2013
Wow… I love the part where Mamoru thinks about her while she’s asleep. Envying this guy who’s allowed to wake up beside her every morning. Well, practically he’s envying himself But it was a truly touching part, showing how deep his feelings for her run, even though he CAN’T remember their past.
Hey did the Senshis steal the TPPRS from our MBPC? ;)
“He’s worse than a nervous new father”? One of the cutest lines EVER!
“Rei would like to point out he freakin’ cares!” xD SO adorable they are!
And Luna’s request! LOL!
I don’t even start with the kiss on the forehead and the palm-phone-number because then somebody has to come and wipe me off that ground!
| raindropcatcher chapter 8 . 11/14/2013
Sigh… All that talking about friendship… It really touched me…
What is it with our detectives and the Luna pen? I have to read on!
Nawwwwwwwwwww. Couldn’t stifle a giggle about that pact and that Luna and Artemis signed with their paws! Too adorable!
Hahaha! Rei’s closing point! xD I love you Rei-chan! And I love Chad for saying these beautiful things to Usa!
I love all of them!
Can’t write more, have to read!
| raindropcatcher chapter 6 . 11/13/2013
1. What an awesome chapter! The episode with the virtual theatre is one of my favourites and you turned it into a story! Thank you, SailorLeia! :D
2. How creative of coming up with those knights! I love that idea!
3. Luna and Artemis making out, huh? Couldn’t help but laugh and giggle!
4. And dear, what should I say about Mamo and Usa in THIS chapter? Is there anything sweeter than walking a girl home? No.
Mamoru and Usagi, sitting in a tree, ;)
5. Do I have to stop reviewing? Because I’m in love with your story :)