Reviews for The Prince
Miare C. Nuvela chapter 13 . 5/11/2015
Tu me laisses sur ma faim ! Your story was so hypnotising that I read it in one go but when I saw the last update, I've become depressed... I would have want to know how L gonna deal with Raito T-T
Huh chapter 13 . 1/25/2015
Will this be continued? I really like how this au was not a cookie-cutter version of the cannon storyline. While you did use some of the plot-points that the cannon has, you've written them in a way that does not feel forced. Please either let us know the current status of the fic. It is the worst form of torture to see a fic last-updated in '08 and not see if it has been abandoned, put on hiatus, or is still being continued. chapter 13 . 1/19/2015
Finding out Watari's thoughts on the whole Kira thing was a novelty, and seeing L act so antisocial was not unexpected (though I also got a bit of a 'my significant other cheated on me, now I trust no one' vibe); I liked how L read too much into whatever Raito said, even as he completely missed the self hate. I also enjoyed their banter, and Teru's fanaticism as he spoke with his idol (even though the idea of having kids grow up with Kira as a bedtime story was disturbing). I liked how you're having Aiber see Raito in his element as a criminal, the way Ryuk affects animals, and I'd like to see how Raito reacts to the douchebag harassing the newbie.

Unfortunately, you haven't written anything in several years-I'm hoping it's grad school, or something along those lines, because I don't want to imagine anything bad happening to you, (otherwise, you're having one of the worst cases of writer's block I've ever seen, but still not the worst) and I hope you'll get back to this story someday when you have the time. Until then, good luck, and thank you for writing this! chapter 12 . 1/19/2015
I liked seeing how everything paralleled canon while being blatantly AU; especially the way Raito managed to enthrall the entire auditorium after L decided to act like a grade-A jerk. I geeked out a little when I read Kanzo's and Teru's thoughts, and L's were the icing on a ice cream cake.
I would really, really like to see how you'd have Raito's and L's epic battle pan out- seeing the way this L got thrown off by Raito's relief after he revealed himself, and the way Raito's already sworn not to go against L but also make it a challenge, I think it'd be great. (I'm just picturing how passive-aggressive the Epic Battle would be, and the wrench the yakuza will throw in the works.)
Thank you very much for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 12 . 1/19/2015
I am a sucker for bittersweet moments, as seen by how I liked Raito's father's perspective on things. (So heartbreaking, yet...) I liked how you kept the whole storyline AU even as it parallels everything I remember from canon- especially the way L's the antagonist this time around, acting like a jerk, whereas Raito's speech seems to have enthralled the entire auditorium (and I enjoyed the way Teru went all 'I have found the perfect guy to recruit for my God', as well as Mogi's and Kiyomi's thoughts); and I adored how you had L be the one who was unnerved by the whole exchange, what with how Raito reacted in a completely unexpected manner, among other things.
I really want to see this showdown between the two; on one hand, I really like this Raito, but on the other, I'd love to see the two geniuses do their thing, as L finds out more and more about Raito, and I'd love to see how Raito passive-aggresively fights back (because you've mentioned that Raito won't go against L, but he wouldn't make it easy for him, and I'd like to see how things turn out).
Thank you for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 11 . 1/19/2015
I liked how you showed the way the forum got used to Kirin and Anti-Kira; I also liked seeing L's attempts to recruit Kirin, his train of thought as he figured everything out, and his meltdown due to that. I was cackling madly by the time I got to Misa's part- I'm having a blast picturing Raito's reaction to her in this universe- and I loved the way you had everything perfectly plausible and almost canon! (I also liked how, throughout this fic, you had L think Kira had delusions of godhood, especially when I remember how Kira was in canon.)

Thank you very much for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 10 . 1/19/2015
This fic so far has been pure gold! Excellent characterizations, dialogue, pacing, tension, and foreshadowing [and knocking on the fourth wall; I snickered when I saw how you had L think this stuff came from an author's mind]. I loved how you had the bittersweet moments with the Yagami family, seeing the way Sayu turned out, and the way you had L consider Yagami Raito much less interesting than Kirin. Speaking of which, I have so far enjoyed how you played with the forum idea; in canon, I don't think they spotlighted the way the world saw the Kira situation nearly as much as you have, and I lovelovelove how you have Raito trolling everyone while airing his self hate and second thoughts, and his misanthropy even as he's getting closer to L.
Thanks for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 9 . 1/19/2015
You did it again: make me wish I could take this, jump into a time machine, and present it to the author before they finished with the concept. I squeed a little when you had her recognize Raito, and when you had Kirin and Anti-Kira interact (I cackled when I saw how the forum started getting used to them), and the list goes on. Thanks for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 8 . 1/19/2015
You have no idea how much I wish this was canon. From the way you kept Ray alive, to the way you're having everything pan out [and, again, no-I'm-not-tearing-up-at-all-I'm-cutting-onions-and-am-heartless about the way Raito's dad's been updated about his son's life], this stuff's gold. (I especially liked how you're having Kira's 'Apostle' get so affected by Kira, both in the news and online.)

Thanks for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 7 . 1/19/2015
This was excellent! I loved the plot twists, and the way Raito's still more moral even now, after everything, than he was after a week in canon. [I like how here, he's not playing a game with people's lives so much as he's trying to redeem the world even as he's hoping to go to hell.] I also like how Kirin and Anti-Kira are friends, and the way the forum was going all 'they went at it for...', and :D
Thanks for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 6 . 1/19/2015
:D This was excellent! I loved how you had Raito trolling all of his fans, and the way L liked him for it, and the way his 'Apostle' reacted...the list goes on [and if I weren't heartless, I'd have probably teared up a little with the way Raito's dad seems to have been tormented for so long- ouch]!

Thanks for writing this!
Anonymouschica chapter 5 . 1/19/2015
This was a masterpiece [in the sense that this is everything I ever wanted in canon]; I loved how you had Raito see the internet and his fans with disdain rather than the 'see, Ryuk? I'm right!' vibe he had in canon. If I were to mention everything I liked, I'd go past the character limit for comments, so I'll stick with: you have excellent writing, your pacing is top-notch, and thankyouthankyou for Raito going the route of L, and having them meet, and making Raito both recognizable and yet likable and human.
Anonymouschica chapter 4 . 1/19/2015
I love the way you're having this all pan out: from the characterizations to the pacing to the way you're explaining stuff I would've had to look up later on. Also, I'm rooting (the American meaning of the word, not the Australian one) for your Raito (I didn't in canon)- you have his character down to an art, and I love how he's more human as a yakuza rather than he was in canon!

Thanks for writing this!
timacat chapter 13 . 12/22/2014
Totally desperate, this is the fifth time I retread this story and still no update since cp13, I started to hate this number
Sonzai Taz chapter 13 . 11/5/2014
Oh gosh. What can I say about this? It's beautifully, skillfully written. The plots all weave so perfectly together, the changes in characterizations, the snippets I did not even think would be important to the grand scheme of things. I spent the last 6 hours reading this fic entirely and I am impressed. This is certainly one of the most alluring stories I have read here, and I am glad today was one of my free days so I could devote this fic the attention it deserves. I must say, L seems to have had quite a bit of luck in figuring Raito out, from Naomis' fateful encounter to Matsudas' chance happening and even Soichiro revealing Raito as his son and Raito losing his temper.

I am happy that Naomis alive though, I always wanted to see more of her in the manga, potential wasted indeed. I love your version of Raito, I adore how you wrote his personas, and I'm surprised he even has any semblance of humanity left after everything. But he does, and it seems as though even without the death note he would have been able to transform the yakuza. And really, if there has to be a yakuza, and there always has to be an underground world, it would be far better under the control of someone like him. I dread that he has to lose, that he has to die, even if that is what he wants. But then actually getting proof should prove much more difficult.

This story hasn't been updated in years. Maybe you won't ever even get to read my review. But I felt that I Had to review a fic as stunning as this, clearly a lot of work must have gone into planning and writing this. I hope someday you will come back to finish this, whenever that is I would love to read the rest of this. It really would be a pity to leave this unfinished. I truly enjoyed spending the day reading this, and though my uni work has suffered, its not something I can regret. I hope to read an update someday. And thank you for writing such a riveting piece of work!
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