|Reviews for Risks and Rewards|
| A MIdsummer chapter 26 . 6/1/2014
I've been worried about L's heirs because I thought they would complicate matters but hey, they're funny especially Mello and Matt. And if Light ever figures out Lij is L, I'll be laughing my ass off. Without the madness of the Death Note, Light is so adorable.
| OstensiblyInsane chapter 17 . 9/19/2013
wait a minute, where the hell was Ryuk in all of this.
| Creature chapter 14 . 7/12/2013
So mister Yagami learns the hard way that there is, in fact, a little thing called reality. Hmm, makes me wonder how this will effect his judgement in future cases of name writing?
| Creature chapter 7 . 7/11/2013
I just wanted to say that this was one of the best arguments I've seen in a Death Note fic. A very realistic argument, with more than just ideology involved. I wonder, if Kira had come from a less fortunate background, if he would have come to be to begin with? I love DN for this very reason. So many philosophical arguments preside within...
| WhiteLadyDragon chapter 23 . 8/5/2012
"So who would you involve instead? Some nameless, faceless criminal? It won't work. Ryuk doesn't want just any life; he wants yours. Do you really think he'd trade you for anyone less than someone we care about? Are you willing to offer up your family? Mine? Our friends? You have to sacrifice someone if you want to save yourself, so tell me, Light, who is it going to be?"
Yeah, more confusion, here. It's stated repeatedly that Misa doesn't mean anything to Light, and she's written off as a mass murderess (which is exactly what Light is guilty of). So, following the logic, maybe they really could have offered up someone else besides Misa?
| WhiteLadyDragon chapter 26 . 8/4/2012
Well, I just finished reading “Risks and Rewards,” including the epilogue, like I said I would. I must say, this was substantially better than its predecessor, “Rules.” A lot of the questions I’d had for “Rules” were addressed—not all of them, but a good number of them—and I liked the more darker tone of this story once the cat came out about who Elijah really was, and it was fun sitting in for the mental tennis matches between him and Light. Gave me quite a bit to think about. As in the last story, the portrayal of your OCs was interesting and engaging, although it seemed that a lot of the OCs from the first story (Mark, Ethan, Annie) were pushed more into the periphery in order to cast more spotlight on the new OCs, Charlie and Lily. Whom I did like, don’t get me wrong. And it’s good that you did not make their respective relationships with our heroes the entire focus of the story, like many fanfics here make the mistake of doing. Although I must confess, that I found HOW they developed to be questionable at parts, Light/Charlie, especially. Shucks, nothing about the OCs from the first story were even mentioned in the ending chapters.
Well, I’ll be honest, I tend to stay away from Light/OC because it’s been stated by Ohba that Light isn’t likely capable of loving a woman. Hell, the only women he seems to genuinely respect are his sister and mother (but he doesn’t love them in THAT way…hopefully). But even if Light really hated a girl, I don’t see him as outright calling her rude names like “bitch” or “she-devil.”
Which brings to my next point: characterization. Still an issue. Now, there was more IC in this story than in the last one, yes. I do admire how you acknowledge that Light is stubborn and will not sway from his ideology easily, if at all, and you showed us how he simply tried to adjust his philosophy in response to the bullets of doubt being shot into his mind, from both bad circumstances (poor Sayu!) and his friends. You attempted to take Light, who was already in the throes of his Kira career, and realistically developed him into the kind of guy Ohba described that Light could have been. It was a good effort. But things still tended to swing towards sappy and OOC rather frequently.
But you know what really broke the deal? Misa. That is, how you treated her in the story. There was mild Misa-bashing in the first story (albeit mostly from Light’s point of view) and I was hoping you wouldn’t go down that road like so many others do, but in this story, it’s cranked up to eleven. She was the one-dimensional caricature that I see in many fanfics that bother to give any attention to her, and while you mention that Mikami may be worse than Misa, it wasn’t enough to compensate for her overall treatment in the story. Light and Charlie’s relationship even upgraded at Misa’s expense! I can’t believe Charlie would do that. I lost quite a bit of respect for her after that. But not just her: Light and L, too. Light is supposed to be developing into a good person, but he doesn’t act like one around Misa. He breaks up with her over the phone, for God’s sake. I did like that he was unwilling to sacrifice her life in exchange for keeping his regarding his contract with Ryuk, but that’s where L/Elijah stepped in and lost a huge chunk of my sympathy. On the one hand, it is arguably the worst thing he’s done in this story, and it does sound like something he would do. But what I don’t like is that it’s not treated as such. Light calls him out on it briefly, but promptly lets it go afterwards. After all, they’re best friends, and that’s all that matters, right?
"You have a second life due to your own merits, soul once known as L Lawliet."
Yeah. I’m not so sure about the merit part, anymore. I said that I doubted whether L would fit in in a place like Heaven in the last story, but after reading this, my doubt has only intensified. Honestly, I was cheering on Elijah/Lily before I came to the part where he made that deal with Ryuk. Then I almost hoped that Lily would reject him instead. She may be observant, but even she doesn’t know half of Elijah’s story, or what he’s capable of. Just like there’s no guarantee that Light won’t mistreat Charlie like he did Misa, who’s to say that Elijah really won’t hurt Lily badly in the future?
It would have been far more satisfying to either somehow give EVERYONE a shot at redemption, or, if you were going to take this route, have it all fall apart and have either Light or Elijah sacrifice themselves for the other, like they kept saying that they’d be willing to do.
Honestly, why is it that everyone else in the story gets a shot of redemption and a happy ending (it’s even implied that Light may get to go to Heaven, after all, just because L vouched for him), but Misa, who is no more guilty than Light, does not? You might think I’m silly for criticizing your story so harshly over this little aspect, but it just doesn’t seem fair, even with the reasons you laid out for why L sold her out to Ryuk. It’s been mentioned that Misa had just as much of a chance at a good life as Light did, had she never gotten the Death Note.
Random nitpick: how is Ryuk able to enter the human world to collect his apples without a notebook being there in the human world? You mentioned that it would be through a “contract” with L/Elijah, but you never exactly specified how that would work…
That’s all I’ve got to say. These were interesting reads, for sure, but I can’t say that they couldn’t be better.
| OrionRedde chapter 26 . 2/27/2012
I nearly cried at the end. Reading the two fics has been a tumultuous and gripping ride. I love them both and I love the philosophical battle illustrated within. Seriously, much love for this!
| FortunateM chapter 26 . 8/25/2011
Absolutely loved both Rules, along this story; Risk and Rewards.
Loved the characters, true to their personalities than most FF stories tend to portray and I loved the pace.
Glad they were true friends, which is very rarely explored.
Well done and thank you for sharing.
| sosi chapter 3 . 8/7/2011
love at the end of the chapter when L tease Light
| sosi chapter 2 . 8/7/2011
I like the plot of this fic and I like how you potray L and Light's relationship(excluding L being a bit ooc) I love how you do Light's character most in this fic because it is more ic...but what bothers me is the girl annie...she annoys me more than misa with her slapping Light and then crying...it just annoys me a lot...but overall this fic is great
| Almecestris chapter 26 . 4/2/2011
Most beautiful ending I've read in this entire fandom. Love it. Thanks so much for sharing this story with all of us!
| anonymoosefangirl chapter 23 . 12/27/2010
I just wanted to say I love This fic but all of your stories are amazing, including come home
| Higashikaze chapter 26 . 9/29/2010
Wow, this was such a great read. I'm glad I stumbled upon Rules, and that there was a continuation that was already finished. I ended up having to plow through all those chapters in a day. I just couldn't pull myself away from your story.
You were able to get both Light and L's characters down pat. And I was able to actually read this with all those OCs, because they were all great characters. Really, you did an awesome job. And it had a very satisfying ending. If only the real series could have went this way!
So, thank you for writing this. It was wonderful. (And it was very refreshing to not be yaoi. Not that I'm against it, but most Light/L stories are yaoi, and I think they work better as friends.)
| KozuKaz chapter 26 . 5/29/2010
This one consistent feeling from this chapter was a long and heartfelt "Awwwwwwww!"
Hehe, such a warm and gooey feeling from the end. The cameos from Near and Mello and Matt were surprising, as you barely mentioned them in this story, but I loved their brief appearance. The letter format gave a nice glimpse into the wrapping up of things, though I would have loved to see you write them in person. Is there any chance for a oneshot or two, something to show Light and L and the heirs solving a case or two together? That would be fantastic, to really see them all coming together. You did a fine ending as is, and it's probably just me that I don't want to see this story end. But I can't wait to read some of your Kingdom Hearts fanfics. Tell me you have Riku in them, please? He's my favorite! Maybe even a Sora/Riku pairing if I'm lucky?
I'm kinda sad that now the story's over, even though their story isn't over. Haha, would you mind just writing out the story of their entire lives? Just kidding, I'm sure you've got enough other stories and ideas on the go, but it's a testament to your writing skills that you get the audience so emotionally invested in your characters that we're left wanting for more even when it ends beautifully. Thank you for writing, not only a excellent plotline for Death Note with believable canon characters (something rare to find nowadays), but that you actually made me not only tolerate but LIKE an OC with a main character, and an OFC at that! It takes skill, and that is something that you have in spades. Great story! Please keep writing for the enjoyment of all your readers!
| KozuKaz chapter 23 . 5/28/2010
I love this story!
This chapter was excellent, and though I am a big Light/L fan when written believably (of which there are very few of), I thought the moment of Light with Charlie was quite touching. Usually I don't read much het pairings, owing to the fact that I completely loathe and detest most female characters in anime/manga for being too helpless or overcompensating and becoming butch women who are super-unbelievably-stupid powerful. It gets old. But with Charlie, she has a nice balance, like normal girls have. She still has her feminine graces, but her take-no-nonsense attitude is refreshing to say the least. And the fact that, not only did you get me to read and actually enjoy a hetero pairing, but that she is an OC, another of my usual hates, is amazing. Belive me, you are a great writer to be the only one to do so in 2 years of reading fanficiton, so thank you!
But, as much as wish the ending with L and Light was a bit different, it turned out beautifully. I was expecting that L (Elijah) was the one Light went to with his depression, but Charlie worked out ok I guess. :P
Your last line, though, however poignant and touching, made me laugh. All I could hear was, "I choose you (Pikachu)!" Certainly not what you were going for, but I must admit, worthwhile and amusing all the same. Excellent storyline and well writen story. You've done a great job! Thank you.