|Reviews for Say Goodbye|
| MysticSorceror chapter 1 . 1/31/2008
I just realized that this is the last fic of yours that I have yet to read, a little ironic considering the title, T_T but in case I forget to say I've loved reading your work so much and you inspired me to think of ideas I probably couldn't before. I adore your writing and hope to see more from you soon. Thankyou for sharing them with me, Myst
Nice opening, good descriptions, I'm intrigued. I like the references to the Japanese culture, nice work. I like the style and writing techniques in this part, it's like a novel. Great metaphors. Wonderful diction, I'm unused to the style so I can't quite criticize it. Wow, I had no idea that that was Tohru, hmm maybe add a couple more hints or work on the characterization better, it seemed rather vague at the beginning. The tone is rather sombre, if you mean it to be like this it's wonderful if not add a bit of color/excitement/energy to the words. The writing seems a tad dull even for a sombre mood, but I'm not exactly sure what suggestions to give in order to brighten it.
Great symbolism of the rose and the tears. I like how the rose is getting passed from person to person it's like a small token of hope. Nice interactions between characters. It's so sad, the forfeiting, defeat, death. Nice close.
Excellent work once again
| Fading Grace chapter 1 . 12/26/2007
Dammit, dammit, dammit. I hate liking things that other people like.
Anyway. You killed Hatori!
“There is a rose.”
-That rose. God. The description of it changed every time it changed hands, because, naturally, there was some wear and tear, but also because it was being looked at by a different person and they found a new meaning in different details of it. It because the emotional barometer of the entire piece.
You write how things look, and carry the story that way. I write what people do, because my stories are very much based only on the people, and the relationships and actions of. But your way…has a better theme. This is a story about a rose, and people-stuff just happens to take place around it.
Everything about the florist’s shop – how tired it is, and how little hope it has. And Tohru just skips in – because, of course, no mere added bonus of candy could possibly sway her – and the rose becomes a beautiful thing and with it the shop and the shopkeeper. Because that’s what Tohru does to the world.
And the very cruel daylight, which bends itself around Tohru and works to her advantages because she’s just so determined to be naïve that everything works to support that. They become enablers of her little dreams, and she doesn’t notice because it’s ALWAYS happening and she doesn’t understand when someone intimates that it’s not.
I don’t like Tohru. Very un-useful, because she eats up any theme I might have tried to carry and turns it into her own ‘everything is beautiful if you look at it hard enough’ sing-along. But she’s okay for you, because your theme was close enough to that for her to leave it unscathed, but dark enough for it to have more meaning.
Oh, the description of the desert. It’s such a small part, and I fixate on it so much.
But you killed Hatori. Dammit.
…This story has inspired me on two different tangents. I’ll explain the other in a minute, but let me just say: I am going to write an Ayame-centric anything with fairy-tale language. It’s just going to happen.
And, that Ayame would still be Ayame, when no one else is themselves. He seems like the one with the flimsiest personality, the one who would be the most hurt and affected. Maybe he’s the best at acting so happy all the time, and it puts the lie to it.
Ayame doesn’t want to hold the rose because it will stick him, and Tohru says that that’s what roses do. Except she’s Tohru, so what she means when she says that is: “Because the thorns protect the pretty rose, you just have to hold it very carefully and hope they won’t protect it directly at you.” But Ayame hears, “Be realistic, you have to be hurt a little to know that it’s really beautiful. This is the key to being a normal person, with a normal view of the world.”
I’m reminded of the movie I :heart: Huckabees. One side is too dark, the other isn’t dark enough, so the people learning from them have to listen to both and find the middle ground. Tohru, being so singular, shouldn’t be teaching them The Way of the Normal.
That you would take the house-Shigure metaphor/comparison thing so far as, “clean, in a way suggesting someone else has kept him so” and that it still makes sense.
And Shigure acting so cold, and then pretending that this is the way he always acts when everyone present knows it’s not. And having perfectly reasonable explanations for why he didn’t so see Ayame, but no one’s perfectly reasonable when Hatori’s just died, so why he thinks this will sail is beyond me.
Oh, I’m not used to a world where Akito is always, completely, referred to as ‘he’. And…yurgh, I don’t like Akito and Shigure as a rule. Because it’s so canon and it’s been done to death, and it’s dark and pathetic and it’s so… ‘Let’s keep things the way they are.’ M. Ironic that he’s so partial to constant-unchangingness, and he wants to change the things to how he wants them to be, which is sort of defeating the purpose… Whatever.
That’s all I’m saying about the Akito Shigure thing. And, if I ever finish the Book of Dog, YOU DID NOT GIVE ME THE IDEA OF CHESS. For the record.
Plot bunny number two: The guy in the white coat as not-but-very-nearly Hatori. Remind me about it later, if nothing shows up in the next week.
And Akito appreciating the irony of Tohru’s pretty, pretty rose circulating to him and being such a useless, broken, old thing to him. I like that. The characters almost never see the theme when they’re in the middle of it.
And that’s all of I’m capable of as I’m talking to you. Sending…
| Angry Girl chapter 1 . 12/26/2007
Hey :P it has been awhile yes but nice to see something from you once more I saw the alert and was O_o then yay!
I liked this even if it continues the never ending or seemingly so circle of bad things and sadness :( Shigure I never ever thought he'd give in and for him to do so is a big shock but then again with him not having kept in touch with Aya and the glue that holds them (well to me) together gone then he has no one to speak to does he? no one to tell his mad scemes of plots and then get called and idiot or told to be careful he doesn't get a result that he may not wish for. And this most likley is something that they would all hate... :(
The description of the rose and it's passing along was well done and well I feel so sorry for them all and Shigure and Tohru alone and with him moving back into the mainhouse would he pay for Tohru to remain there? as poor Tohru... Yuki has gone back in as well hasn't he? to be the new doctor yes? Oh you've got me all thinking you will do more won't you? yes? yes? *pokes* :P hope you had a good christmas :)
| Katia-chan chapter 1 . 12/25/2007
I...you...it's...now look what you've done.
I really have lost the ability for coherent thought here. First off, the imagery, it's just...beyond words; really. You paint so clearly, that it's almost painful (in a very very very good way.) It's really just beautiful.
It is not the yellow light of summer, or even the searing white-hot light of cruel
days in places where you can be killed over a drop of water while bandits let the sand cover over the gold bars you were carrying, along with what will
be - in over a week - your bleached bones.
-And this is what I'm talking about...it's not even my absolute favorite passage, but it's so just...wonderful and creative, and if I put every image I loved in, this review would be quite the novel.
And then, I somehow forgot the implications of the verse we were in, and it took me a pathetically long time to catch on, and then it hit me like the ton of bricks, and I was pretty much off and crying from there. You give me time to heal the wounds from reading the other fics, and then rip my heart open all over again...you are cruel.
Tohru, with the instant emotional switches...that just broke my heart. It's just so...I can't even express. You're stealing all my good words.
But the absolute best has to be the part with Ayame and Shigure. Not to say I didn't love everything, and the part with Akito is...chilling, but Shigure and Ayame's conversation is frightening, and nerve wracking, and intense, and just left me shivering.
. “You never answered my calls.”
“I did. I picked up the phone and explained that I was busy.”
“The first time. I called many, many times.”
“And Tohru-kun explained that I was busy.”
“Ah, but Gure-san…you should have someone more adept at the art of lying do yours for you.”
-This part sealed it for me...it's so frosty, and so unlike Shigure, and right away you can tell he's angry, and that it's that scary angry he gets...and the VC (yes, you did con me into starting the series) reference is very there...that painful politeness, made all the worse for the fact that it's Ayame, and he's talking to Ay like he might talk to someone else, but not his best friend. It's so hard to read...because everything seems so broken, so irreparable.
“Whatever for? You have a practice to run, a move to make, and, oh yes, a mad god to console.
No one expects you to be everywhere at once.”
-Enter the bitterness...it just...hurts. I started getting on about the flinching here, and feeling so badly for poor Ayame...though I do appologize if I've missed any points you were trying to make entirely.
And, I can't quote everything that ripped out a piece of my soul, because this review would never end...but the scene with Akito was, as I said, chilling, and...disturbing, even though it had the feeling of inevitability to it. Shigure's...flatness through the entire thing just scared me, and I loved it, for reasons I can't even begin to list off here.
He's so scary, when he's so emotionless...especially because it doesn't seem like there's that gentle-teasing kind of manipulation, it's something else much darker, and it's incredibly unsettling.
OK, rambled on long enough...I'm just going to go huddle in my corner and cry and reread this.
It's a beautiful story, and you're the mistress of weaving these beautiful complex webs, and you should be worshipped for it.