Reviews for While the Children Sleep
beautiful dreamere chapter 2 . 12/30/2007
freaky! made even freakier by the fact that my name's christine! lol
Brown-Eyed Angel1234 chapter 2 . 12/30/2007
This seems interesting, can't wait to see where you take it. Update soon.
ames 449 chapter 1 . 12/27/2007
I do not flame, nor have I ever but what I am going to do is give you a little advice here and I really hope you take the constructive criticism on board. In essence your story is too short, contains no description whatsoever and therefore no pull to a reader. Your dialogue is fine but that is all you have written; dialogue. As a reader I want to visualise these characters in my head. I want to see tension, the thoughts of the characters and their respective feelings. I noticed that this is the first thing you have written and my remarks shouldnt put you off continuing to write in the future but have a look at published books and take note of how they write. It is a difficult process to balance imagery and dialogue successfully. By no means do I profess to be an expert in writing but I know what I want as a reader and this did not deliver, which was a shame because the summary grabbed my attention.