|Reviews for Loneliness|
| Fan Fan Girl chapter 1 . 1/5/2008
This one is only so-so for me. Though it's awesome to see some Sain/Lyn FRIENDSHIP interaction, I think that you could've done better. The sentences and flow that I usually rave about weren't as strong here, and characterization was a little iffy.
"She clung to him for a short moment, but she did not cry, and it only served to remind him that she was the same, strong, proud woman he had once known when they had been younger and more foolish." This is sort of a characterization issue. Though Lyndis not crying -would- show that she is still strong and proud, the fact that she CLUNG to him sort of implies that she isn't. Like she's so overcome that the moment she sees him she's clinging just for dear life. Not something that I can see Lyndis doing...
But I do have to say that the fic got better as it went on. Dialogue was nice, especially Lyn's description of Kent's death. And I liked how it was subtly Lyn/Sain in the end. :D Sain is such a gentleman!
| Edward Houshi chapter 1 . 12/31/2007
Again, I cried. (I'm a little emotional about fics...)
I thought you used the word illness lot, nd in the beginning the dialouge seemed a little forced. You wrote it well though, and I enjoyed it.
| FireEdge chapter 1 . 12/27/2007
You made me tearful again, though this story is not so much sad as emotional. It's definitely different, this fic, since it's Lyn who watches Kent die. It has a different effect, I think. It's less... depressing. I'm not sure why, but when Kent's the surviving one, everything seems more sad...
Anyway, on to Sain... the real star of this story. It's very interesting to see how he's matured. It kind of seems right that he should turn from a carefree and cheerful young man to a knowing, sombre one. The change is rather unnerving if you place the two Sain's next to each other, actually. But, like I said, it seems very appropriate. Maybe because we all knew that Sain would "grow up" one day.
| Kitsilver chapter 1 . 12/26/2007
I'd say it is different from your usual work, and I like it. It all feels very real. Lyn and Sain are in character, the grief and friendship they share tangible.
I especially like Sain in this piece. He's a friend to both Kent and Lyn, but he's also a mature and sympathetic character on his own, someone who's experienced grief and regret but also love.
A very good piece, Manna.