|Reviews for Naughty Girl|
| LoveIsMyHate chapter 1 . 3/10/2008
AW! it was sweet! i loved it!
| Nozuka chapter 1 . 3/10/2008
so this is how it would be like if kiba and sakura got together. I almost makes me mad that they haven't exchanged a single word to each other in the manga/anime. so hot!
| Kiba92 chapter 1 . 3/10/2008
I have to say this is one of the best stories i have read, along with your other story in the process Bad Company. im gonna have to put you on my favorite authors list.
| JingYee chapter 1 . 3/10/2008
lol, very good. _
| shika'sgurl22 chapter 1 . 2/23/2008
Ok most of my stories have smut but I think that this is the best story I've read in a while. It was wonderful! I already thought Kiba was so hot, but now I wish that was me in that story with him. You rock! write more please
| taikiko chapter 1 . 2/12/2008
hot. i love kiba.
| InosBane chapter 1 . 2/12/2008
Most excellent citrus!
The only problem I have is that I currently need a cigarette...
Kiba is very, very HOT! Good Girl Sakura!
| rawrchelle chapter 1 . 2/9/2008
Damn. I had no idea Kiba could be so freakin' sexy. And with Sakura, too; who would've guessed?
Okay, because there isn't much to criticise in this, I'll be picky.
- Darn. I can't find it again, but there was this one sentence where I felt that you overused the word 'look'. It bugged me, because most of your sentences in this oneshot were pretty amazing.
- Oh, and for Kiba, even though growling I can totally see him doing, don't you think trying out other words will make it a little less boring? If he growls his dialogue over and over again, it just... I don't know. Doesn't sound very nice after the first couple times.
- I don't know if it's the same for all readers, but I just got turned off at the word 'butt'. I would normally use 'behind', but, I guess, it's your stye of writing. 'Butt' just somehow seems a little... immature, I guess? But then, 'ass' doesn't work all too well either. But yeah, that's up to you.
- And at the end, when Kiba fell asleep... I don't know, I would've thought that Sakura would fall asleep first.
On the other hand, there were a number of good things (which I'll have to cut down by a certain number, or else this review will most likely be so long that it'll take you forever to finish reading).
- Come on. Adding Chouji into this? Normally, he's such a minor character-not to mention that he's not common within lemons/smut-so using him as an excuse for Ino to leave was good. And adding him into the end was good also. (And this is totally irrelevant, but I would've liked it if Shikamaru was somehow in there as well xD.)
- Ah. You were still able to keep the debating and rivalry between Ino and Sakura. I liked that.
- I just adored the way you made Kiba and Sakura begin to get it on in the streets. Can it really get any kinkier than that? Oh, and the dancing before when Kiba first arrived, and her grinding into him just in spite of Makoto-bwahaha, serves you right, bitch.
- The actual lemon was short. And you know, in this case, it's actually a good thing. Because the foreplay and everything else before made everything so right already.
- Haha, I thought they were going to get it on again when Sakura told him where her room was. Which, I would think, would be too much. But somehow, when you hint it like that, it made me think, "No, that's enough for one night", so maybe you could possibly put it in a different way. I'm not sure.
Okay, I shall stop my rambling now. This is basically the way that I would -love- to write-although I'm a lazy butt and I'll never be able to sit and think of all those big words. So maybe, one day, one of my works will be written as splendidly as yours.
Adding this onto favorites. Don't be surprised if I review again sometime in the future anonymously. :)
| ember007 chapter 1 . 1/26/2008
| Peach Tuesday's chapter 1 . 1/11/2008
I really liked this :]]
| MovingOnFromThisPlace chapter 1 . 1/11/2008
Awesome. One line hit me like a smack in the face. (In the good way.) Loved it! Liked the ending. Liked the setting. Liked IT.
| jenny.meow chapter 1 . 1/6/2008
omg, was that good!
kiba is so... hawt
| Paosheep chapter 1 . 1/4/2008
That was good. Lots of tactile focus - which (ironically) you don't see much of in smut, but I think it makes it much better. Good job.
| Fairy Of Anime chapter 1 . 1/3/2008
I love it! Pleases write more to it soon!
| Desperate Fool chapter 1 . 1/3/2008
Damn...I never knew how utterly SEXY Kiba could be! I am HOOKED girl...or guy...friend! LOL
Write more stories! I'll look forward to reading them!