Reviews for The Last Son, Book Three: Changes
Nimbus Llewelyn chapter 9 . 7/15/2014
Okay. I acknowledge that you are a fantastically talented writer. Your world building is without equal, your writing of action, while it can occasionally come off as a bit Superfriends/overly cheery in style, is clear and effective. I have a number of issues with the story, (overpowered DC, underpowered Marvel, the depressingly overpowered even by DC standards, holier than thou and generally unbelievable (seriously, 21? Take a look at Smallville!Clark during Season 6/7 and explain to me how a 21 year old Superman would be that ridiculously mature) Superman who no one reasonable disagrees with, the nauseating Alison Blaire - who is, admittedly, redeemed somewhat by the Galatea arc, and a complete lack of understanding of the Jean Grey/Phoenix dynamic and her ensuing power levels - Dark Phoenix could take the entire Justice League at once and win, comfortably). However, I accept that you have acknowledged the gaps in your knowledge and have taken steps to rectify that in recent chapters.

This issue, therefore, is not so much about canon (though I have many things to say about the way you've utterly mangled her personality - for starters, this is a woman who very definitely is NOT defined by a man, dead or not). Instead, it is taking a female character and turning her into a one dimensional mockery of a strong character. She only exists to glower suspiciously, mutter about loose cannons and then give, in this chapter, a nationalistic and vaguely racist speech to Superman, thereby allowing him to, once more, play the Holier Than Thou card (yes, the law of Riona Prime is interesting. The tone, not so much). She serves to make Superman, the League and Fury
look reasonable by comparison.

And then, when Superman gives his 'they paid in blood' speech, she doesn't respond, perfectly reasonably, that yes, the research was abhorrent, but it yielded definite results, results that they are perfectly within their rights to use to protect the world, that much of modern science is built on similar foundations. This is an argument that Lex used only a few chapters ago, with, arguably, far less reason, which Superman reluctantly accepted. Instead, Carol just stands there like a lemon.

Reason being? She's a one note strawman, a mockery of a strong woman, who is, ultimately, defined by her man (dead though he may be).

Now, yes, I can understand why she would be angry at the loss of her husband and felt that Superman should have done something (though it should be fairly obvious that Superman was still a kid when her husband died). However, anyone who has achieved that high a rank in any military should be able to control their emotions and act in a professional, intelligent manner. She doesn't. Instead, she starts ranting at Superman, with a cookie cutter reason for her antipathy towards him, serving only as a reason for holier than thou exposition. You didn't even bother to come up with an interesting reason for her being ill disposed to the League. You just resorted to a cliché.

For goodness sake, if all that wasn't enough, you even dropped her several ranks. She's not a Lieutenant, she's a Lieutenant-Colonel. Even in the Ultimate Universe (which you seem to have largely drawn from for the Avengers) she's a Captain, before she becomes Director of SHIELD.

All this smacks of two things: first, laziness. Second, your writing, while brilliant in terms of plot and continuity expertise, lacks maturity. It doesn't, by and large, have emotional nuance and subtlety. The characters don't grow. Every time there's an apparent game changer (Galatea, Clark's capture by Darkseid), the crisis ends nice and neatly and everything, character wise, snaps back to square one.

Now, I really believe in your work. Your conception of Zod was nothing short of brilliant. Your world building is astonishing. Your knowledge of DC continuity is very impressive (the same cannot be said of your knowledge of Marvel, but as noted, you have acknowledged this and made steps to change it). So that's why I am annoyed: you are better than this. Or you should be.

I will admit that part of the reason for my severe irritation is that Carol Danvers is a particular favourite of mine and you inexcusably mangled her. You took her loyalty to her country and made it her defining trait, to the exclusion of all else. It isn't, and, again, lazy. She hasn't appeared for a while, up to the latest update, so I think extensive rehabilitation is required, hmm? And, I would humbly suggest, it might behoove you to watch Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, for her depiction if nothing else. For her depiction specifically, I point you to 'Ms Marvel: Ascension', particularly the time before she had powers, and the current Kelly Sue de Connick run on Captain Marvel.

Speaking of which, don't you think it logical that a military woman would take a more military themed codename? Such as, I don't know... Captain Marvel?

But part of my anger is that you resorted to the typically dismissive hysterical woman explanation for her disapproval of the League when I know that you can do better, and, more to the point, at this point in your writing, could do better.
LaNaturalBreezeOf-Books chapter 43 . 7/4/2014
To be truthful, I couldn't enjoy the character of Alison Blaire. Everything else was exceptional; the descriptions and dialogue was engaging and was what pulled me through this monster story!
I tried to give Alison a chance like you said but I was turned off and frustrated by the way she talked to Clark; constant giggling is probably a common female trait but it made her look like a schoolgirl that still gossips to her friends about how cute the new guy was. I'm not exactly a expert on Clark Kent/Kal-El's character but he is a mature adult that is past the schoolgirl types.
I recognised that most of the females in the story, when engaged in a romantic scene, coo a lot. Cooing is aimed at children or cute animals, or in a joking manner if it is aimed at an older person.
I cringed every time Alison cooed at Clark. Whatever mature romantic stuff going on at the time was promptly *killed* by that almost degrading choice of word. I can't help it if you really believe that is how Superman's one true love should speak to him as if he were a child.
I appreciated the attempt to make Alison more tasteful to the readers by making her sort out her own problems with the whole break up thing but she was pretty weak in dealing with her emotions. Like, get over it!
I see Superman as a man and too many times have I seen Alison be an emotionally weak and inferior female that should have been like Lana; left in the past. I admit I skipped a lot of a Alison/Clark moments because it made me swear in frustration few times too many.
I stayed for the Zod plot and I wasn't disappointed. The General could have been one awesome 'take no bullzhuut from no one' sort of guy which is needed but I guess fate has a strong grip on him. I also really liked your creative use of onomatopoeia. Haven't read much comics of watched many tv shows so I'm taking everything as I see it! Can I ask a question, how many science-babble-historic stories, words and phrases are real? It is so easy to believe everything.
Good job I was impressed! ;)
MF 22 chapter 43 . 3/25/2014
I hope the fourth book has Cadmus being taken down, with Lassider standing trial for treason. He not only disobeyed a lawful order from his superior, but one from his Commander-In-Chief. That's treason, an offense that brings with it the death penalty.
MF 22 chapter 11 . 3/22/2014
When using the Kelvin scale, you don't use degrees. You just say the number and Kelvin (or K, for short,) such as 0 Kelvin, which is absolute zero, with the Celsius equivalent being -273.15 degrees Celsius.
wolvesowl chapter 40 . 3/5/2014
This is a great story! Thanks for posting.
Miriam1 chapter 38 . 2/26/2014
I have two questions. 1) Is Deadpool a character of any canon, either Marvel or DC? 2) This is the second meta-break of the fourth wall I've seen in this story. Is this common for Deadpool, either as a canon character or as an OC?

Beyond those... I don't have words to describe how amazing this story is. Just when I thought you've outdone yourself, you quickly go one better.

I'm looking forward to reading the oncoming battle. (There are SO many subplots going on, you have plenty of material for the NEXT story, as well.)

Sincerely,
Miriam
Miriam1 chapter 34 . 2/25/2014
General Zod IS everything Superman's detractors thought Kal was.

Kal is content to live peacefully, and help everyone around him do the same. Dru wants to take the Kryptonian superior intellect and power, and take over Earth and its various races present, probably at great cost to everyone involved.

Kal will learn that his godfather is the tyrant the inhabitants of Earth fear. That won't end well. The upcoming clash between Zod and the son of Jor-El will devastate poor Kal.

But I'm sure that Kal will win. He won't be unscathed, but he will succeed, or at least draw a temporary stalemate.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out.

I'm looking forward to reading further.

Sincerely,
Miriam
Miriam1 chapter 10 . 2/16/2014
I suspect an odd romance coming up. Batman and Wonder Woman are unlikely but interesting.

And you are right: Joker's evil is a vicious type of crazy most our protagonists haven't encountered until now.

I look forward to reading further.

Sincerely,
Miriam
Miriam1 chapter 5 . 2/16/2014
The sad thing is that Superman can actually read the writing and could answer their questions.

However, I guess this is part of the Kryptonian ethos: if the native Earth people figure out how and why the Kree stuff works on their own, that might be close enough to not violate the "do not interfere" rule.

Lorna is Magneto's daughter. You know, if Erik would have simply met her without any ulterior motives, a lot of family reconciliation could have occurred. Instead, Magneto used Lorna.

I find it interesting that the Mutant parents just don't seem to do good jobs towards their kids. At least Mystique is trying to correct her past wrong doings by being a better mother now.

From the little we've seen, Sebastian Shaw has been awful to Shinobi. Sebastian could have a much better relationship with his son, but he chooses to only value Shinobi by how successful a minion he is.

I wonder if Dr. Doom would turn on Anita if she gave up on Superman for a suitor. I also wonder who Anita would settle for, should she give up he pursuit. But first, she would have to learn that people are not possessions to be used at will.

Considering her father, Anita would have difficulty with that. However, it might be possible, and weirder things have happened.

I look forward to reading further.

Sincerely,
Miriam
Mr. Scratch chapter 1 . 8/28/2013
Thank you ZK Chromedragozoid for an awesome character!
shin obin chapter 24 . 8/27/2013
i too, am going to forget i read that.
Brilliant chapter 43 . 6/4/2013
You son of a bitch! You are just utterly brilliant! The writing, the plot, the perfect union of two worlds?! Incredible to say the least! You are incredible isr. And I wish you can make infinite more.
Page 31 chapter 31 . 5/31/2013
Mxyzptlk has none of the limits you gave him. He had no range limit. He didn't need a projector. And he can control reality with no sweat at all. read/Just watch Emperor Joker and you'll get what I mean. Other than that, meh.
Page 25 chapter 25 . 5/30/2013
Love the part of Alison leaving. About time. Hate the part about all the villains escaping. It's getting annoying. They should be killed ahead when Superman had the chance.
HaywireEagle chapter 43 . 4/22/2013
It took me forever to get through these three books and here I am now, ready to take the final step.

From book one where Kal was a rookie Hero with high hopes. I read on as he grew into his destiny and fought greater and greater odds to find acceptance in a world that stands in fear and awe of his powers and technology. Watched as he struggled through betrayal and covert plots from all sides. Watched as he found love, family, while always trying to be the beacon his father Jor-El wanted and his adoptive one Jonathan knew in his heart.

All I can say is good job and I look forward to continuing reading this marvel of fan fiction no matter how long it will take.

I have loved every twist and turn and look forward to the last set you will undoubtedly bring to us. You have cemented yourself as a favorite that should be read by all as a cornerstone of this art.

You have created a piece of work blending the worlds of Marvel and DC in ways few could even muster. Thank you for putting these words to paper.
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