|Reviews for My Body, Your Hell|
| Lord Melkor chapter 22 . 12/19/2008
I fucking hate this new reviewing system.
'kitten' that sounds suspiciously like a Xia word.
Geeze, Zuko. You really need to start laying off the estrogen pills.
Gasp. Xia is a demon!
I'm very suspicious about the 'break up' scene. I think there's a little more there then meets the eye.
| Bluetiger chapter 22 . 12/14/2008
Well I do like twisty, unhappy ever after endings, lol, and this doesn't disappoint. Everyone is left morally corrupted in some sort of perverse or unpleasant way, not that there was anything that any of them could really have done about it. At least Kuiodio's little plan backfired on her to some degree. :D
I've enjoyed reading this sequel, and so I really appreciate the time and effort you've put into writing it. Oh, and I'm glad that you are working on updating 'Dangerous Desires', I'm can hardly wait to see what you've got planned there. )
| Liooness chapter 22 . 12/14/2008
poor zuko and katara, but i'm glad kuiodio got what was coming to her! great job!
| Liooness chapter 21 . 12/13/2008
yay, you updated! great chapter and poor katara. love how toph wasn't affected, but she can't meet him eye to eye.
| Bluetiger chapter 21 . 12/13/2008
So they were both demons, I really didn't see that one coming, still I'm not really sure what Kuiodio thought they were going to achieve, what with Sliyar, Saidon and Shurinere there to stop them. Although maybe that was always part of her plan, hmm. O.o
Let's hope Sokka gets that cactus juice he wants, I think they all deserve a glass after everything that they've been put through. XD
Oh, and I'm glad that the scratches on Sokka's chest aren't too deep, but what about the ones on his face? :D
I'm glad to see that you are updating your fics again, and I hope that everything is going well with your book. Still, it's good to see you back here again. )
| CrueFan21 chapter 1 . 11/1/2008
Excelent I must continue
| c jones chapter 12 . 9/23/2008
Interesting story but you keep mixing up the dialogue with the other person's response throughout.
Like here where she asks a question and then you give his response
“Come swim with me.” He shook his head.
It should be her question and something about her if desired, then a new paragraph with him shaking his head and his response if he makes one.
“Come swim with me.” She held out her hand to him.
He shook his head. "No."
Dialogue usually starts a new paragraph (in the second line)so technically a third line break would be better) but this way it is clear who is talking. You appear to have it the other way around in this and other chapters. It will take some work to edit it and make it correct but it will read much easier after you fix it!
Hope this helps make your stories more accessible.
| Naley2006 chapter 20 . 8/21/2008
Today I have read the 40 chapters of My body, my hell. Tonight I finished reading this sequel. I never really liked Zuko and Katara together as much until I read these stories, but you make me see they would work together. Please update soon! I can't wait to see what happens!
| Liooness chapter 20 . 8/4/2008
a little confusing with the tenses changing and spelling/grammar errors (sometimes the gatekeeper's) but a good chapter. can't wait to read more
| Lord Melkor chapter 20 . 8/3/2008
you wrote this after you wrote about duncan, didn't you? lol
zuko and his self righteous personality. he is just oozing good guy now.
i enjoyed the back story on the bitch!
| Bluetiger chapter 20 . 8/3/2008
So they can either keep the two demonic babes, or swap them for Katara, hm, well I know what I'd choose, lol. Still Zuko is right, it has to be Katara's decision, otherwise she'll make everyones lives a complete nightmare, and make Kuiodio look like a complete amateur while she's doing it. XD
I am a little surprised at how helpful the demonic trio have been, but I guess they are only helping the gang in order to mess with Kuiodio. :)
| Liooness chapter 19 . 7/8/2008
Yay! Kuidio got roasted by Katara and the triplets! hehe, i like the play with toph, but she hasn't kicked ass yet. great chapter and can't wait for more. also love the yoda talk of the gatekeeper. hehe. that'll be fun once she figures out what's been happening
| Bluetiger chapter 19 . 7/8/2008
You know, i'd read a fic that featured butterflies kissing unicorns, sounds sorta kinky. :D
So what happened to Kuiodio, I hope she's still able to meet with Lady Moridana (who I have decided to picture as the lovechild of Yoda and Long John Silver). Oh, and what's happened to the real Toph, I mean she's never worried about hurting Sokka before. :)
So you and Lord Melkor have a plan, well I'm intrigued, but I'll let you decide if I am a loyal reviewer or not, lol.
| Lord Melkor chapter 19 . 7/7/2008
yoda! i loved all the scenes in this!
katara should so bump into zhao so they can have a tea party like in Alice in Wonderland!
the part with avatar roku was a bit rushed and/or short. you might want to actually write out what aang had to say (it wouldn't have to be very detail). it could actually be funny with aang just spewing it out in one breath. lol.
i have one more constructive thing to say...what was it...oh yeah! um, i honestly have no idea about anything concerning babies, infants, toddles, newborns etc. but it seems to be about time for the babies to drink milk or something... i do know that in general babies eat a lot, so i assume they would start getting hungry soon...
THE PLAN kukukkukuku
| Bluetiger chapter 18 . 7/1/2008
Just as I was getting my hopes up, it looks as though Katara will be coming back after all, lol.
So what are these three demons hanging around for, surely with their tasks completed, they could simply claim their prize and leave. I guess that they have their own set of objectives, I just hope it doesn't involve kittens. :)