|Reviews for The Truth Decays|
| TsukasaTheFominian chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Sweet, a new chapter. Ed and Negi are teaming up to destroy the seal, sweet.
Keep up the good work.
| Beboots chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Thank you very much for updating! :D (And just when I was contemplating actually doing homework... ;) )
I really like the debate going on about the curse seal, trying to find answers to questions... and you're setting up why they won't do things so there won't be plotholes later on. Good. I also really like your portrayal of the politics and machinations that Tsunade has to go through, especially with regards to clan heads... especially with regards to Hiashi.
Also? Aww, Hinata... ;_; Also, Hiashi's reaction WIN! :D Very in-character on both accounts.
"I’m sure he’ll get tired of playing with himself eventually." OMG your Ibiki rocks. As per usual.
"“I’ll look into it,” Jiraiya said. / He couldn’t promise much more than that, especially with the head of the Hyuga clan sitting right there." Very true.
Yay Neji! :D Tracking down the origin of the seal? Awesome. :3 With Team Gai along babysitting Edward? Even more so!
Naruto pretending to be a nurse to get in? I can see that. A female nurse? I can see that too. Also, I loved this line: "“Could you ask him?” Sasuke asked, omitting the “for me” part that usually accompanied such requests." VERY in-character.
I like the description of the things that Edward has tried to do to get the seal off.
"This was frustrating as hell, but it was hardly the worst situation he’d ever been in." The sad thing is, for Ed, this is very, very true. I also really, really like this line: "Ed hated to admit it, but he desperately wanted Al’s opinion on what he should do. Half the ninja weirdos in this village claimed they were trying to help him out, and the other half were comfortable letting him know they wanted to torture him to death, or at least into submission. He had a feeling that Al would know the right thing to say even to those people to get them on his side." Aww... I really love Ed'n'Al's brotherly relationship. They're adorable. ... You ARE going to have Al show up soon, right...? Right? ;_;
I also like the "What would Mustang do?" paragraph - also very in-character.
I like how Ed grudgingly acknowledges his own weaknesses. But isn't completely uncharitable towards himself: "The only level he could really compete on was massive property destruction, and then he’d probably only end up ruining things for civilians." XD "Then I’m going to knock those stupid faces off that ninja mountain." He would SO do it.
And oh, Jiraiya, and his stories of nurses... XD
"Jiraiya was actually rather fascinated by the way Ed’s metal hand grasped the delicate paper. It was just as steady and precise as his flesh-and-blood hand." I can also see that. I also like how you occasionally mention his limbs; some fanfic authors seem to forget about them entirely.
OMG YAY AL! ... I mean, yay armour!... and Al. I like how Ed's picky with it's exact details. ;)
"Shinobi sometimes did the same thing. They’d leave a clue in a random object that their contact was likely to come across. Usually it would be a note inside a statue at a temple or something like that. Mass-producing a toy that Edward would recognize was a bit extreme, but..." I really like those lines... and NO you can't use Al as leverage against Ed! D: ... I mean, it would be all-too easy to do so, but that would be mean. ;_;
And ooh... Ed's learning about chakra! :D I love how he's taking notes, and has very intelligent (but detailed) questions. Very in-character. Especially when he starts taking notes very quickly and ignoring the world. ;) I also love that he wants to experiment with caged seals on mice, and that his only objection is the small surface area. ;)
"He jumped back and was halfway through the seals for a katon jutsu when he realized it was Maito Gai." PERFECT reaction. :3 "Gai fought the urge to mention that his attitude was not very youthful" Also VERY in-character. So is this: "Lee had said ‘no,’ of course, but he doubted Lee would speak against one of his sensei’s ideas." ;_; I also like the sentiment in these lines: "He seemed worried Gai would take it, which was a bit insulting. Gai was not a thief, but if he wanted to steal it, Ed was not in any condition to stop him."
Also, this: "carrying a toy around like that was a little too youthful in Gai’s opinion." XDD
"Gai hadn’t been able to find a ground floor apartment that he liked, so he had had to pay for the floors to be reinforced so he and Lee could continue to increase their training weights." XD I could definitely see that. I also like the remark regarding radios and tvs and noise. ;)
And aww, Ed chosing his futon because it was closest, so he could pass out right away... ;_;
And aww... Lee is uncomfortable around Ed regarding the metal limbs? ;_; I could actually see that.
"“I must ask you not to discuss this with anyone, not your families, friends, or even your eternal rivals!” I love how he has to mention that last one - it really goes to show what Gai's definition of "eternal rival" is. :3
"“He yells a lot. He likes to argue, even with people who could easily kill him,” Lee said. “I think he wants to die.” Gah! ;_; That assumption... Lee is totally pushing his negative feelings onto his interpretation of Edward's feelings... I'm excited for the scene where Edward beats some sense into Lee. An infusion of determination. It's got to happen eventually, right?
"He’d never intentionally shown it to her. The only time she’d seen the mark before was when he went a bit nuts at the chunin exam and showed it to Naruto." I can actually see that. I get the feeling that Neji was really hard to be around, pre-chuunin exam, and didn't even really trust his teammates.
I can see his intention with the action, though. And Ed's reaction to it is... touching. ;_; I assume that Ed and Neji will bond, somewhat, over this? ... Neji's totally hoping that he can use Ed's situation to maybe find out how to get rid of his own seal... And I can't see him doing otherwise, you know?
I also love that Ed totally misinterprets the appartment, thinking it's a gym. I can see that. Also, trying to escape immediately? XD Definitely in-character. The ninja's reactions were also in-character. :3
And glee, Ed showing off his mad alchemy skillz. XD
"If they waited until we were adults, we might say no." Snap. In a sad way.
“So Queen Boob the Fifth doesn’t mind the whole slavery thing?” XDD
This line was made of WIN: "but people usually talked about the Fourth as if he made gold rain from the sky on alternate Tuesdays"
"“What does a village of killers-for-hire need righteousness for?” Ed asked. / Neji couldn’t come up with an answer for him." Ed... kind of has a point. ;)
"He thought it might be possible to transmute something edible out of the horror that was Gai’s pantry, but that would be a lot of thinking and he didn’t have any sugar to make his brain work." ;_; Poor, poor Ed. I totally sympathize with the lack of "food". I love that he contemplates transmuting something, but...yeah. ;)
I love Ed's "trades" for food. XD Makes sense! "And all these people running around cheering as he fixed things would probably help him out later, if he needed them to turn a blind eye when he eventually made his escape." SO TRUE. I love how he calculates his reputation like this.
I also really like Ed's justification for why he doesn't accept much in payment... and his explanation of why he doesn't normally do things on this scale. Very in-character... and awesome. And oh, giving up brushing teeth... :3
And ooh - Neji can tell that alchemy didn't use chakra. Interesting! :3 ... and ooh, did Neji totally try to help Edward out...? :D
And dude, if this is "bogged down"... stay bogged down forever! :DD This chapter was awesome, period. Please update again soon! :D
| demon89 chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Ooh! Have Neji and Edward entered into a secret alliance? Ed's starting to learn what it means to be a ninja! I can't wait 'till the next chapter! I'd like to see more Ed/Naruto interaction.
| yaowdonow chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
this is the first story i actualy want to read XD i realy like it
| WingsOfFate chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
“I’m sure he’ll get tired of playing with himself eventually,”- you made me snort my milk, I hope you're happy. -_-
| Jjvalour chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
So there might be someone else from Ed's world as well, interesting.
| mer chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
unless if Ed's "destroy-your-body-no-jutsu" have been revealed, wouldn't almost anyone who was sent to get him get killed when they tried to heft him towards where they wanted?
| animefan29 chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Beating the Sharingan's Genjutsu is one thing. Beating its ability to predict movement and copy Ninjutsu is something else entirely.
How did Ed "fix the formula"? I ask this from a scientific standpoint as the energy of souls was the catalyst needed to initiate the alchemic reaction. Without an energy source such as souls or chakra to act as that catalyst is it truly possible for such reactions to occur? Doesn't seem likely.
How do you think Ed would react if he saw a summoning jutsu?
| HecatonchiresLM chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Thankyou for a new chapter _
| yuenyuen13hotmail.com chapter 12 . 3/22/2009
Why would Tsunade be even 'a little disturbed' with insects? I mean, with her vast experience and stuff I would assume she's been through and seen much more disturbing things than that and would have been thoroughly desensitized already? You do know what she summons, right? That bit just didn't fit in with the rest of her characterization, I don't think.
| Flaming Man of Iron chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Awesome addition! not every chapter needs to have a fight scene. Great dialogue and plot advancement. Please keep writing! :)
| Secret Weapon Unit 06 chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
| Yanslana chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Wow... lots of stuff going on here.
I guess I liked the fact that Edward wasn't able to remove the seal, since I believe most people were betting that he was going to be able to do so, as the other option would have been death. But the little twist you pulled here is pretty neat. It was also pretty neat of you to just brush past Edward's reaction/ensuing scenes of him removing the seal, and just have Jiraiya narrate it. Some stuff, while interesting, don't really need to be put in detailed about.
The shift in perspectives are also pretty neat throughout this fic, I like the fact that you're juggling multiple people's thoughts/views on things, so we're able to see and enjoy the story told from similar view points, and things that one character thought of, is missed by another character, or gets interpreted differently. It's really refreshing, and I think you've got a good grasp on things, and every character and their thoughts are unique, it's like instead of one 'path' of the story going from beginning to end, we're seeing a twist of paths that are occasionally mingling with each other.
I completely missed the hint with the Al-armor toy that you tossed several chapter ago... wow, again, really neat. Now I wonder just what other hints you've buried in previous chapters that I've not picked up on. Y'know, looking at the armor thing, and whether or not Al also made it here... the immediate thought is, I wonder if this has anything to do with Rain's technological advanced state? And then I thought of, I wonder if this has anything to do with the statue that Pain has that can store chakra/souls of the demons?
But that would be mysteries to be revealed later, much later, I would assume, since the immediate problems/threats still needs to be dealt with. Poor Edward.
Seriously, he has so much on his plate already, and you're adding Orochimaru/Kimimaro to it as well. Are you setting up for a bit potluck explosion here? Let's see... he's going Ibiki/the Leaf interrogation pissed at him, Sasuke hounding him for the Sharingan stuff, Sakura/Ino/Sasuke fangirls after him because of Sasuke, Tsunade mad at the clothes thing he pulled, Danzo/Root/the Leaf council in the background taking a stab at him because of what he's capable of, possibly the Hyuuga if he manages to get the seal off, and overall, the only person he likes and honestly likes him and didn't do him any ill is Naruto, the one person that the village as a whole hates, just over the fact that they're "friends" of sorts can get all sorts of people want to pick on Edward... and if that's not enough, Itachi/Akatsuki's out there somewhere, and now enter Kimimaro... so yeah, a lot on his plate here.
Although on the other hand, Edward did manage to "win" some supporters with his alchemy, so that's some cushion ground right there.
Oh, speaking of the Hyuuga and their seal, from what you've got there, I wonder if the way they're going to remove it is something like this, Edward cuts off a piece of his skin/flesh, so it's all fresh with his chakra and etc... and connected as a 'part' of him, and then tries to move the seal over to that piece of skin, then severs the connection? Or something like that, it's the only reason that I could deduct on why he would remove a chunk of his back, unless it really was an accident, which I feel is unlikely.
And another thing about enough on his plate, when is the Shinigami going to make an appearance? From the previous chapter, an interesting comment he made to Edward was the part he said about having Edward 'fetch' a soul, and that Edward isn't bound by the gods/rules of this world, and they can eat it together. I'm curious to see what he meant by 'fetch' there. From what I understand, Edward didn't kill anyone until he was forced to save Hinata, correct? If by 'fetch' the Shinigami meant 'kill with your own hands' or something like that, then did Edward have his first meal? With how 'normal' he's acting, it doesn't seem likely, so I wonder if it could be that he 'fetched' the soul, but didn't eat it, so it went straight to the Shinigami instead? Although I won't disregard the thought that I may be completely over-thinking this and perhaps Edward just killed a guy who is just dead dead as oppose to dead eaten.
Thought on the Shinigami, again, nice work on making the parallel connection between it 'eating' the souls vs. the stuff in FMA, were souls are also consumed for energy. The thought I'm most curious on about is this, would we end up seeing a macabre version of the Third and Fourth half-eaten by the Shinigami like the manga scene where Edward and Ling got eaten in Gluttony's stomach, and they saw Envy's true form, with all those souls making up him body, and all of them mostly gone except for lingering thought? The part that had my attention was where Edward got them out, and that one head whispered a 'thank you' before it disappeared... So I had wondering if the Shinigami might still have the Fourth's soul, except it's mostly eaten, and the only words it would say would be something like 'Naruto... Kushina... Leaf...' or whatever... although with the latest Naruto manga chapter, it's not as likely as before.
Oh, last comment that I almost forgot! But this is very important! So let me just say this again: Thanks so much for writing a Naruto/FMA fic that's based on the manga! I mean, the anime had its moments, but the ending was beyond stupid, and it twist and spin on the characters even more so. But unfortunately that's where the most of the fics are based on... so yeah, thanks for writing, and updating, and continuing to write, and continuing to update, (hopefully very very very soon), and with much love and appreciation from your readers.
P.S. Chapter 15 is 1/3 finished, yes? When do you think that will be ready for general consumption?
| Gravenimage chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Great chapter updatte soon.
| Chibi Tenshi Sama chapter 14 . 3/22/2009
Ooh Orochimaru... the plot grows more intense... This is turning out great! Can't wait for your next update.
Keep up the good work!