|Reviews for Tears of Lushoto|
| allymcg777 chapter 4 . 5/12/2009
that's a really sad but cool ending. he faced hi death with courage
| ArmoredSoul chapter 4 . 10/12/2008
You wrote the combat and character interaction so well, I thought I was right there in the middle of it.
| Wee.Doctor chapter 4 . 8/10/2008
i liked it, it was a wery good story, indeed.
| karma chapter 4 . 7/20/2008
omg that was butifull good job
| Electromotive Force chapter 4 . 2/23/2008
Oh, I see what happened. Chapters three and four were just part of chapter two in a weird glitch or a user mistake. I guess the story only goes as far as chapter two. Nevertheless, good short story you have here. Take care.
| Electromotive Force chapter 2 . 2/23/2008
Dang, I was really not expecting this kind of end for Carl. That is, if Carl turns out to _be_ the main character, seeing as there are more chapters for me to read. Even though he showed signs of cowardice early on, he certainly pulled off a nice one with the gas'n'dash. That was cool. And he stood at the end, looked his foe in the eye, and smiled wider than it. Even though this turned out to be a grim fate for Thomas, his Marines, and Carl, it certainly has that sense of realism that just seems to work well. But again, to be honest, I definitely wasn't expecting this sort of outcome, especially so early on...which really makes me want to read further on. I am liking this story so far. Honestly, I am.
Just make sure you read through your chapters before you post them. I saw numerous spelling/grammar mistakes. Nothing too big, but it definitely helps to proof read-something I can attest to. I always goof up here and there, but it makes a HUGE difference when you step back and read your work as if you hadn't even written it (as if you are the reader). Critique yourself, always. It works even better if you have someone to read your stuff as well.
All in all, not bad. I really like your execution of imagery and what the characters are thinking/feeling. I'll get to the rest shortly. Take care.
| Electromotive Force chapter 1 . 2/23/2008
Seems interesting. I look forward to the Covenant occupation and what these handful of folks will do.