|Reviews for Misfits|
| FandomFairy01 chapter 4 . 1/31/2014
It was good :) hope you do get to write a sequel I would definetely read it
| thatgingerprincess143 chapter 4 . 12/15/2010
Do u have a sequel?
| TheNotedMusician chapter 4 . 4/21/2009
this is really good! Update soon!
| ToxicWings333 chapter 4 . 1/2/2009
i liked it
| peace.love.write chapter 4 . 9/3/2008
Don't tell me that's the end? Cliffhanger girl! Don't make no sense. (Excuse the poor grammar, I say what I feel) :)
| magdilen chapter 4 . 8/27/2008
what a sweet story. i can picture lucy acting like that.
| LucyCrewe11 chapter 1 . 8/15/2008
Good story. I always thought Lucy was quite a bit like Sara from "A little princess"
| Cerdwyn3 chapter 4 . 5/20/2008
I love Lucy, she's my favorite daughter of eve _ I do hope you write a sequel- could be about boys and balls - or about her and Hannah finding their way to Narnia...
| not bad chapter 1 . 4/21/2008
This is a lot like "A little princess" I mean the jelous girls called her "Princess Lucy"? doesn't that remind of of sara crew being called, "Princess Sara"? All the same, it's very good
| Queen of the Unknown chapter 1 . 3/21/2008
Wonderful fic, PL. Lucy is in character, and I really like Hannah, too. The end was a bit random, and you could use some more discription, but those my only criticisms.
Oh, and I love "Little Princess".
| CompanionWanderer chapter 1 . 3/17/2008
You are a refreshing bit of light in the darkness, Miss. Your stories are sweet, and the words on your bio speak volumes. I can see a large influence of Frances Hodgeson Burnett and perhaps a little L.M. Montgomery in your writing - excellent, excellent ways to feed the imagination. It is clear that you are a reader of good literature, which has given you a good grasp of basic grammar and writing flow - something most fanfic writers would do well to emulate, instead of sitting with their heads in teen magazines and then wondering why they can't write in complete sentences.
Here are some suggestions to make your stories even stronger:
1)A little more detail and description would enrich your settings. In this story I have a decent sense of a few character traits but not much about what they are like generally, or of the atmosphere of the school. Most amateur writers go way overboard with this and give paragraph after paragraph of pointless description - you have done well to avoid that! But meanwhile look at the way good authors describe things in just a few pithy lines, like the way Miss Minchin is "very like her house...tall, dull, respectable, and ugly" with "large, cold, fishy eyes" and a "large, cold, fishy smile." That's all we get, and yet now we know pretty clearly the kind of person she appears to be. See if you can capture the look/feel of your characters and places in the same kind of way, a few well-chosen words.
2)Make an outline of your story before you start writing. A couple of these feel like you came up with an idea and started writing quickly, but aren't sure where you are going with it or how you are going to end it. There is nothing wrong with this - I have a story doing the same thing! So don't feel like this is a criticism as much as a suggestion. Your stories would feel more complete if they had more of a structure to them - in the sense of an introduction, a build-up of conflict/tension, a climax, and then a wind-down and tying up of loose ends. Figuring out ahead of time what each of these areas should look like will make fleshing out the rest of the details much easier and help you pace out the action. Again - your stories are good - this is just something that can make them even better. I haven't read the ones that were posted by others, so I cannot say if this same advice would apply to all your work.
You are well on your way to being an excellent writer at quite a young age (I'm guessing). Well done! Keep at it.
| a chapter 2 . 3/9/2008
Very good. It reminds me of "a little princess" and the finshing school parts of "Ella enchated" But with a cleaver narnian twist.
The lucy/tummnus bit seemed sort of out of place but did have a slight concetion to narnia in a story that does not take you to narnia.
| Kelev chapter 4 . 3/7/2008
I noticed that you made Lucy like Sara Crewe, and Hannah VERY much like Ermangarde St. John. Clever. _ I always loved A Little Princess, and it's nice to see a little hint of it in here.
| fledge chapter 4 . 3/6/2008
OF COURSE you'll have to write - not so much a sequel, as this story most certainly is not finished, - a chapter or two more! If nothing else, you need to do something about poor Hannah! Valiant Lucy simply must help her to reach some self-respect.
| spectacularspectacular chapter 4 . 3/6/2008
please do write more!
i'm really enjoying how this is going so far.