|Reviews for Officially Speaking|
| CRyogenic-maelStr01m chapter 18 . 8/13/2017
Laughing at the irony bc wasn't the entire point of Shiro/Zangetsu beating the shit out of Ichi for control that Ichi tries to think and plan too much when he fights
| a person chapter 34 . 2/12/2014
I know you stopped writing these years ago, I don't know if you still read the reviews, but why did you stop? This was an amazing story...
| TrisakAminawn chapter 10 . 8/14/2013
He's kissing her but they aren't being shipped, is what you're saying? Well, that's weird. Especially considering the type of person Ichigo is, holding people away, I'm sure he never considered kissing any of the girls at school...still can't believe he put up with being denied the chance to finish high school...
| TrisakAminawn chapter 7 . 8/14/2013
Yoruichi. Not Yuruichi. You and names are not close friends. Okay, so this wedding thing is cute, especially as it keeps dragging Ichigo back into his friends' orbit, but I'm not sure how he's supposed to serve as best man while passing as an academy student who knows no one in Seireitei.
Orange is a hard color to match with...I guess cream is fine. Fitting with Renji's outfit would seem to be more important, though...I guess since she's technically nobility they can't get married in shihakusho like I'd expect is normal. Though there's a weird level of Westernization to this whole endeavour.
Hmm...considering Rukia's part of House Kuchiki and Renji has no family, even if he has a name, he's probably going to be marrying into her clan. Which is mega awkward.
Heh. Sister. Purple and orange hair in one family. Then again, most family in Rukongai isn't blood-related.
| TrisakAminawn chapter 5 . 8/14/2013
Uh...Ikkaku was fine, though he has a silly side. I mean, the man does a lucky dance before he fights. Yumichika was...okay, I guess, definitely amusing, though his obsession with beauty honestly isn't the same as being feminine. And while his tastes are clearly weird, see facefeathers, they seem to be relatively restrained - I can see him pushing for butterflies (unfortunately the only butterflies I can see Renji getting to fly in formation are the messenger hell-butterflies, which don't send quite the right message) but I think he'd find glitter somewhat gauche. And squealing out of the question.
If it weren't for Byakuya's Senbonzakura, I expect he'd push for a scattering of cherry petals to set the mood...which we know are acquirable because Kyouraku had Nanao scatter them for him when he made his entrance during the original invasion arc. Heh. Maybe rose petals, for romance...except there was Charlotte Culhorne...man, flower-themed swords are kind of a thing here. Giving people makeovers they don't want is definitely within Yumi's strike range, though. And Renji actually has so much potential, good hair badly cared for, nice bones...XD Yeah, I can see it.
| TrisakAminawn chapter 4 . 8/14/2013
Yeah, these folks are so subtle. Much more emotionally rewarding than I was expecting...and also holy shit, Renji is proposing? That's...I mean, seriously, with these people's lifespans, that's crazy. They weren't even vaguely a couple a year ago. They were BARELY SPEAKING a year ago. There is no way this is not an insane rush. This would be an insane rush for living humans, no matter how long they've known each other.
By the way, you spelled Byakuya 'Bayakuya' and Unohana 'Unahana' in this chapter. Do you have a deep-seated affection for the letter 'a' or something?
| TrisakAminawn chapter 3 . 8/14/2013
Eh pairings. The third person is fine, though the change is bizarre. Yay classmates he can actually talk to. And tying in a fight, and sucking at something. Huge power does not equal multitalented. And yay relationship moment with his sword. Heh. 'I was just tired of fighting' is an okay justification for his letting himself be bullied into this, but...what about his precious people who are still alive? How can he let them be taken from him that easily? There is nothing more important to Ichigo than his sisters.
And to correct my earlier self, they actually call the sword fighting discipline of Soul Society 'zanjutsu.' The art of frickin' DECAPITATION, or by another reading just of 'killing people.' They cranked it up a notch from kenjutsu, never mind a panty-waisted modern term like 'kendo.' I mean, yes it's the 'zan' from 'zanpakutou,' but still.
Which...Zaraki not wanting to learn 'swordsmanship' is one thing, but turning down 'the art of decapitation' is kinda surprising, from him. But then, I can see him saying 'I know how to chop heads off, already!'
| Waywardneko chapter 1 . 7/31/2013
Okay, constructive criticism time:
you have a good idea, decent dialogue, plenty fine plot, but it's not quite descriptive enough and the grammar feels ...off somehow. Thoughts are not clearly defined from telling, and really feels like you need the beta you talked about in the summary. You are very good, just need practice with describing things, being a little more in character, and grammar. I hope this helped, and am not trying to offend, just say what is wrong so you may improve.
| TrisakAminawn chapter 2 . 7/1/2013
Still no explanation! Is he dead or not? Dammit, don't bring up the weak places in your premise and have the character MULL over them, if it isn't an occasion to throw some reasoning out. Distract from or cover problem spots, don't draw the attention to them! I begin to see why this story is abandoned. I will not try to read it any more.
Also, although Ichigo is very strong, his kenjutsu is really not very good. He has a pretty good stance from childhood karate with Tatsuki, and he's learned a lot of stuff from practical experience of what does and doesn't work, and from Zangetsu, and he covers for he weaknesses a lot with sheer power, which is the most important thing at fights at his real level anyway, but he could absolutely stand some lessons on proper form and efficient movement, and on proper guard because his defense is pitiful. Just because monsters like him and Zaraki can get away with neglecting skill doesn't mean the skills are actually useless.
| TrisakAminawn chapter 1 . 7/1/2013
...the interjection 'is that the right term?' makes no sense in that line, so I'm assuming that's the author intruding. INSIDE QUOTATION MARKS. This is a pet peeve of mine. It's bad enough for the writer to break into the *narration* out-of-flow, but into the dialogue, with barely even any punctuation to soften it? Gah.
And in this context they'd possibly say 'kenjutsu,' 'the art/techniques/skill of the sword,' since the Gotei 13 are old-fashioned and practice swordsmanship with lethal intent, rather than the modern post-Reformation disciplines usually called 'kendou,' 'the way of the sword.' On the other hand, 'kendo' sounds good next to 'kido,' and the attraction of a tidy-sounding list to bureaucrats should never be underestimated.
I assume Ichigo died in the war, in this continuity. Otherwise he'd be kicking up a hell of a lot more fuss about being dragged away from his life and family and friends. Or broken beyond functioning, if they'd all been offed. After all, he protects. That's why he's done everything. Also it was weird to see no covering in the discussion of whether he's allowed contact with his shinigami friends. I mean, Renji was bidding fair to edge out all previous contenders in the 'best friend' slot for a while there.
And Rukia's very important to him. And this guy calls several captains by their first names and seems to mean it as friendliness instead of insult. Come to think of it, does anyone actually expect Kenpachi to be able to fake not knowing him? Or put up with his squad members having their memories wiped, since all of them already know Ichigo. Hmm. The logistics...
You also have a (sp?) lingering near the top of the chapter. And yes, ryoka is an acceptable spelling. These were both things you could confirm very quickly on your own through Google.
| Awesome chapter 1 . 6/17/2013
It's kenjutsu... I know this from naruto. Yes it is correct and I am liven this story. I need to read the next chapter...
| Rabbit Pie chapter 4 . 5/10/2013
Ahaha, this chapter instilled a _most_ amusing image of Renji and Ichigo running a food black market of sorts. :P
| Warrior of Ice and Shadow chapter 34 . 4/17/2013
Dude, keep going, this is a really good story!
| Guest chapter 2 . 3/18/2013
"I assume the bathing areas are on the lower floors, they always are in this place. "
I assume the bathing areas are on the lower floors, they always seem to be in soul society.
| Guest chapter 1 . 3/18/2013
Hado kido stuff
Hoho shunpo / agility stuff
Hakuda hand to hand, martial arts basicly
kendo style of using both hands when wielding a sword.