Reviews for Heaven is Real
CracKing97 chapter 1 . 10/30/2010
You're a GENIUS for writing such an awesome poem. I loved it. I sort of starting singing it with some weird tune, but then I thought that someone could even turn this into a song. But whatever. AMAZING poem! D
lifesateaparty chapter 1 . 5/21/2009
Wow, gave me chills the last lines mad eme cry they were so simple but so genius!
disneydork chapter 1 . 3/22/2008
Aww!

That was really good!
Kaytee Jay chapter 1 . 3/13/2008
Lolly...you give me chills. Bravo.
The Dark Shark chapter 1 . 3/10/2008
Oh wow...

That was stunning. The desire, the pain, the longing, it was all so real. Jesse's thoughts were so clear I could feel it cut through air. I'm not the most knowledgeable person on poems, I can't judge if one is good or not but I could tell this is top-notch. I like how unstructured it is - like Jesse's thoughts which come and go. No one thinks structurally (or whatever the word is).

I'm not sure I completely got the end though. Does this mean Jesse moved on by his own doing, or he chose to be invisible to her eyes and yet still linger on? Either way, it's sad :(

Kudos to you.
EchoingSilence chapter 1 . 3/9/2008
Aw, poor Jesse. But, I really liked it. It was very well written.
dawning beauty chapter 1 . 3/8/2008
wow, that's REALLY good!
PurpleHippoKing chapter 1 . 3/7/2008
I love it. It's so beautiful. It's also kind of sad.

This is my favorite verse

When all is lost,

And this world turns to sand,

I’ll stand beside you

And take your hand.

I’ll love you

Beyond the corners of time.

I will bleed

Until the words rhyme.

Really great job. ]
satellite falling chapter 1 . 3/5/2008
Lol-you poetess! Gorgeous. I find your last line captivating-I am a sucker for first and last lines!
nikki chapter 1 . 3/5/2008
wow. great job, truly. It was sweet and almost haunting. you can almost feel his pain and conflict. i applaud you! lol

"When all is lost,

And this world turns to sand,

I’ll stand beside you

And take your hand.

I’ll love you

Beyond the corners of time.

I will bleed

Until the words rhyme."

- That verus was incredible! By far one of my favorites. Keep up the good work!
Guest chapter 1 . 3/5/2008
the how she shimmers at the end killed it. maybe you think the italicized phrases at the end make the poem more sophisticated, but it actually sounds kinda tacky. but i rly like the poem, although i don't rly like jesse
Dannie Tomlinson chapter 1 . 3/5/2008
Beautiful.
The General G of K chapter 1 . 3/4/2008
Oh, wow. Good golly, Ms. Lolly!

What powerful imagery and sense of forlorn this connotes. The idea of separate worlds accidentally clashing, and consequently desiring something you cannot grasp in this lifetime or the next. I think all of us can relate to that whole wanting something you can't possibly have.

There were a couple stand out lines for me. First, I loved that stanz that ended with "I'll love you/beyond the corners of time./I will bleed/until the words rhyme." Again: the IMAGERY! But also, that's just such a novel way of putting Jesse would die in order for this relationship to be realistic.

"You’ll go on.

And I will linger

In the shadows of

Your glorious flame.

When all is forgotten

I’ll remember

Your name."

Finally, I just simply adored this stanza, too. The juxtaposition of shadows and fire; it's, again, great imagery, but it also reminds me of Wesley in "Angel" and how he is always in the shadows of both his father's prestige and that smarmy Knox who is also in love with Fred.

In the end: pure poetry (excuse the *witty* pun)! Much saluting in your direction, I will.

The General
Amabel chapter 1 . 3/4/2008
You're right. It really is beautiful! Kind of sad, but it left me feeling an "Aw" sort of thing. Very good! I really liked the "words don't/do rhyme" thing. Very cool.

- Amabel
Craziness-n-love chapter 1 . 3/4/2008
Aw, Lolly! That was so chilling, but it was beautiful at the same time. I absoutely loved it. Especially the very last verse. Seriously, I'm in awe of you for writing that - it flowed so WELL. Even though the verses were loosely written and didn't have a particular pattern, it seemed like everything fit so perfectly. You did an amazing job with that )
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