Reviews for I Needed You
Guest chapter 1 . 5/2
Aww... super cute! :3
ktfoo chapter 1 . 5/7/2009
I felt you were mostly fine as far as in-character goes. Everyone likes to write these guys a little fluffy sometimes, and besides, it's FANfiction. However, I think there might have been more turmoil on both of them-they DID just have a hugely angsty moment and I suspect they would have both been roller-coastering. For them to come together with as much ease as you depicted, they might have needed at least a few days.

There could have been more description, I agree: Your entire focus was on the character's feelings, which, while in itself can be admirable, doesn't really work for pieces any longer than this. THANK you for having correct grammar on your first try-only edit I can find right now it capitalizing Jareth's last sentence spoken. Your comma-ing is just fine .

What I like: You end your sections with punches/slight cliffhangers that keep readers reading.

What I didn't Like: The end sections were tiny! they could be combined or lengthened to be more effective.

Keep it up .~ and thanks for another JS piece with a happy ending.
magialuna chapter 1 . 11/1/2008
Well, first of all.. I could not tell this was your first fic. Second, I really liked it. I thought it was quite in character. What always surprises me in some fics is how Sarah is depicted as hating Jareth or is quite nasty to him. From what we were shown of her, she was a girl who made friends easily, learned that things are not always fair, and would likely reply her time in the Labyrinth over in her mind - analyzing it. I thinks she qould come to the conclusion that she had been hasty in her judgement of the G.K. and would seek his forgiveness for her unkind words. It makes total sense that she would question his absence from the party, and that she qould do it afterwards as to not do it in front of his subjects. Great fic! Thanks for sharing it. -Clare
LadyVampyreMiya chapter 1 . 7/26/2008
haroo! (why am i greeting you... *smacks head*)

anyways

loved the story! t'was nice n sweet :D :D

most stories have them out of character - tis very hard to keep them IN character :S

XxoxX
Athenian Grace chapter 1 . 4/30/2008
cute!

great job
goblinkingjareth chapter 1 . 4/19/2008
The beginning unraveled a really great idea about how Jareth felt after Sarah left him. Good job! XD XD XD
incandescent euphoria chapter 1 . 4/16/2008
I thought you did the descriptions rather well. However, you may want to work on the pacing just a bit. We jump from Sarah's distress, to Jareth showing up, to their reunion too quickly. Realistically it would have taken them longer to come to terms to what had happened between them and what they felt. It was a good first try, though. The first part (Jareth's POV) was poignant, and the last line of it sounds exactly like something Jareth would say.
MusicalLife17 chapter 1 . 4/8/2008
i loved it ... really fantastic
LilithBlack333 chapter 1 . 4/4/2008
SQUE! cute very cute.
Farie Insignias chapter 1 . 4/2/2008
I freakin' loved it! All of it! I thought it was very well written. Kudos!
JeMS7 chapter 1 . 4/2/2008
I like this, very well written for a first timer. I think you could've used a little more description in the story, but well written none the less.
Jennifer Hack chapter 1 . 3/30/2008
For what it's worth, I think you did a very good job of keeping everyone in character. :)
Regnig-oftheblackforest chapter 1 . 3/28/2008
This is a very good story. So sweet! I'd love to read more of your stuff, so keep up the good work.
Beccon chapter 1 . 3/27/2008
For a first-timer, you've done a lot better than a lot of the people with 2 stories on this site (not just in the Laby section mind you). Could've fooled me. So where's the next story? )
La'Sharna chapter 1 . 3/26/2008
wow, that was such a sweet ending. i like how you kept their character in character. And i like how you wrote about sarah not being mature enough to understand or accept what she was being offered. great work.

Sharna
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