|Reviews for Undercover|
| Dark Lady of the Sith chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Wow, more explosive action! (Or rather lack of explosive action, if you want to get technical.)
It's fine that it's lasting longer than you expected it to. You wouldn't want it to be rushed after all.
| MutantPiratePrincess chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Man, you really left me close to speechless here! This chapter was breathtaking! Creepy, suspenseful, and just so full of surprises! I never EVER would've expected Rufus to come and save the day! Not after he had been missing for 24 chapters! But that little naked mole rat sure learned a thing or two about timing from his human, didn't he? ;)
Then, some really weird stuff happened that would well make a 12 on the creepyness (is that a word?) scale... Starting with those "undead" Whateley followers, all the things he said about that cult - though I kinda liked this one statement he made: "That's why I wanted to get you and your lover down here." Lover, huh?
But the most creepy moments of them all: Those thoughts that Kim was having (undeliberately?)! Calling a death-bringing explosion "pretty" and "warm" and things like that and Ron "loser"... That just gave me the creeps, really!
Oh hey, I didn't forget about the Silver Key. I kinda knew it would play some kind of a role in this scene. Though I thought maybe it would show Kim some great memories that would make her reconsider her suicidal plan... But those memories Ron was experiencing were quite interesting (especially those "those thirty-nine rain-soaked minutes"... ;)). (Just on a side note: It was a tiny bit confusing when the point-of-view shifted from Kim to Ron, as it never changed within a chapter before, as far as I remember. But once I noticed, it was fine.)
And I guess seeing Ron like that, thinking of him as dead (even if only for a second or two), had a similar effect on Kim's plans. And what a fierceful fighter she proved to be in those suspenseful paragraphs! Way to go, KP!
"But after all she's suffered through this weekend, what's Kim got left inside of her to tap into?"
Uh... I guess if he knew, he'd want to rephrase that... ;)
Wow, it's hard to believe Whateley finally got defeated. But now, he is, or at least I hope so. I loved this very emotional scene, where Kim and Ron hugged each other and both started crying. And I'd sure love to hear (or rather read) them telling their plans to one another... But it looks like there's something else coming up right now. "They're coming..." So, who's they? Those cult members? Uh-oh...
Gosh, you really know how to keep up the suspense! Awesome job, Michael! I just can't wait to read on! Keep up the astonishing work!
| Ms.VioletB.Hollister chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Uh... Okay. The ending was pretty creepy, but still good. When are the final chapters going to be updated?
| melissaeverlasting chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Hey! This was a very good chapter. It was action-packed and my interest never wavered. You're right, this may not have happened if you had posted a 10,0 word chapter. And, I'm extremely happy that there will be another chapter; I'm not quite ready to let go of this story yet. It's been a ride, Mike (May I call you Mike? I bet you like that name), and we've loved every second of it! Can't wait for your next update! :D
| waveform chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
That was intense, Michael. Kim's inner dialogue with herself, Ron's life flashing before his eyes, and the fight with the inhuman Gideon Whateley. Again I say that was intense!
Rufus to the rescue! The little guy has a great sense of timing, doesn't he? But it looks like the great evil is going to bleed into our world anyway, and Team Possible is in their sights. This can only get worse before it gets better.
While I had looked forward to the conclusion this chapter, I am glad to see this story will continue for at least one more. Keep up the great work, Micheal!
| screaming phoenix chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
I believe the most interesting and important thing that was brought to life in this chapter
Was that Kim Possible can work up a pretty good blood lust if she’s pushed far enough.
The first fight with Whateley, while intense, wasn’t half as frightening as Kim’s internal dialog at the time. There were times that she longed for death, was willing to take out everything around her just to get him, all that mental imagery of flowers and glorious endings told me of a person pushed to the limit of what she can endure; composing her death song to sing at the final moment of her triumph.
The fact that Ron was safe and came back to help her, irritated her so much that called him the one thing she has never called him before ‘loser’ shows just how far she had gone in the final preparation of her suicide run.
Here you show the true Ron as well. All the humiliations heaped upon him during his brief lifetime. The truly soul crushing episodes of his life laid out in vivid and excruciating detail for him to review again and again like some mobius strip of pain and suffering, rejection, and despair. The fact that he survives and even flourishes, despite the overwhelming odds stacked against him shows that, of the two of them, Ron Stoppable is the superior member of this team when it comes to defining the word ‘courage’. Kim’s courage is the world saving kind that we would all like to have; Ron’s courage is what we all need to have to survive in a world that regards us as little as Ron is in his world.
I loved the final (?) fight with Whateley. He got served, and big time. That had to be the a$$ kicking of all a$$ kicking’s. It had to be good for Kim as well; that had to purge a lot of hostile emotions she had been building up inside her. Nothing like beating the snot out of someone who’s P. you that badly.
What scares me is that the real bad guys are coming and our heroes are pretty much wiped out now! On to the next chapter!
P.S. I hate to be picky but just how did Rufus tunnel into the center through the ‘five inch steel shell’ that Whateley couldn’t punch through?
| Joe Stoppinghem chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Still a great story.
I'm getting a little lost in some of the fight scenes but it's all worth it.
Glad to see Kim didn't use the poison pill, yet. However, it's looking like the three will not be getting out a live, but one can hope.
Thanks for all the time and effort you've put into this one.
| CajunBear73 chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Kim's battle to stop Gideon left her with her thoughts of what she had to do and some of the 'why' as well. Some of that was grim reality, some was personal and she fought with that as she fought her enemy. Her final option almost taken, but stopped when Ron came back in, gave a glimpse of her thoughts of her sidekick in the heat of battle and for all she brought herself to about him prior to that moment, she's still got some heated darker thoughts of his status in her world.
Ron's flash before 'the end' revealed to him so much pain and loneliness that is his life. Just can't see him looking back at much of the good things in his life as such after he considers his high point in meeting Kim in Pre-K as the worst moment in her life. I guess he's on the road to severing ties with her at this point, regardless of consequences and either's newborn feelings for each other.
Now it seems that a gateway has been opened up and more bad guys are coming. More to come, I'm sure.
| Laura Crossing chapter 25 . 11/15/2008
Your best chapter yet. As usual, I loved the tenderness between Ron and Kim. And as usual, there is an unexpected twist that disrupts the moment. I am left wondering what happens next...
| noncynic chapter 25 . 11/14/2008
Yep, that word count thing always vexes me, too. Great showdown between Kim and Whateley. Nice collection of flashbacks for Ron. Lookin gofrward to these two dealing with those beings on the other side. Good Work in General, as usual.
| Shrike176 chapter 25 . 11/14/2008
Interesting chapter, I was kind of looking forward to seeing the end after all this, but I can see how length was a concern.
What do you have against Ron? After everything he's gone through you couldn't at least let the good times flash before his eyes. Especially since he isn't going to get the girl after everything he's gone through in this story.
You definitely know how to write a compelling story that grabs the readers attention, next time could you possibly do something a little more upbeat?
Looking forward to finding out how it ends.
| HecatonchiresLM chapter 25 . 11/14/2008
Wow. One of the best choreographed fights I've ever read
| Stubbs101 chapter 25 . 11/14/2008
You know, It's not a nice thing to toy with people's emotions like this. I geared myself up for a death scene at the end of the last chapter,was relived during this one, now i have to perpare all over again! I don't have the tissues for this.
seriously now, great chapter, looking forward to the next.
| Ms.VioletB.Hollister chapter 21 . 11/8/2008
Very well written as always. I will pace myself in reading your story, so that I don't finish before the last 2 chapters are updated. It must take a very long time to write chapters as long as you do.
| Ms.VioletB.Hollister chapter 20 . 11/6/2008
Amazing. Just amazing. Please don't give up this story.