Reviews for Undercover
MrDrP chapter 28 . 1/26/2009
A strong, welcome ending to a very well written epic tale.

While I still can't place "Undercover" within canon - there were far too many crossover elements for me to see this story unfolding between the episodes of S3, I can place it among the best KP fan fics on this site. This story had it all: a complex and compelling plot, characters I cared about, humor at all the right moments, romance, action, and some very enjoyable cliffhangers.

As to this chapter, you did something impressive: you took the familiar events of "So the Drama" and made them new. Well done!

I will offer a minor quibble: the Monkees belong to the Sixties, not the Fifties. That said, that was one of many delightful moments in this chapter.

In closing, many, many thanks for a most satisfying read.
Laura Crossing chapter 28 . 1/26/2009
'The most perfect guy in the world for you is now...your guy.' Wow, that line just makes me melt. As a female reader, this ending appealed to me on so many different levels. I loved the mixture of romance and lust (that has always been there, but now there was actual touching and kissing!), meaningful conversation filled with explanations and apologies and, most of all, the potential for a tender, loving and mutually respectful relationship that we all long for. They are now partners in life and in saving the world!
noncynic chapter 28 . 1/25/2009
Man, too many good bits in this last chapter to list, honestly. So, I'll just say Excellent!

You did very well fitting your story into Canon. You did extremely well depicting the characters as more realistic then the show did, with it's necessary limitations. All in all, nothing I can see to complain about.
MutantPiratePrincess chapter 28 . 1/25/2009
Aww! Wow! Seriously, Michael, I don't know what to say! It took me more than one hour just to read this chapter (or Epilogue) - partly due to the fact that I was reading extra slowly so I could enjoy it for a little longer ;) -, but I really don't know how long it would take me to express what ran through my head (and my heart!) while I was reading it. But I'll try my best. Where do I start? Well, let me just start with something that sums it all up pretty well: You totally made my day! :)

I've been so looking forward to this happy end to your story (though the thought of your story being over made be a little sad at the same time), and I assure you, I totally enjoyed it, from beginning to end. Especially the first part, at the prom. All those things we learn about Kim's and Ron's feelings towards each other and their relationship, even before the series started... They just made me go "Aww" all the way! Like, the story of their first kiss in Kindergarten (and little Ron's reaction to it!), Ron's fears of losing her because of "Erik" in some way (and Kim thinking back to her "near death experience" in New York, obviously), and - my personal favorite bit of dialog in the whole chapter, I believe - the "revelation" about Freshman Year Prom. Not only that the following line had me almost cracked up:

"I never had a sister, KP. Or ever will, of course." (He, he...)

Ron's "freaking out" at the prom and "the dream"... very memorable moment. And not to forget this memorable quote:

"Their faces separated by about a foot, just far enough for the rapid rise and fall of her... upper torso to be visible.

Okay, that doesn't help the situation one bit." ;)

And then everything from:

"It's all like a dream come true," he managed to choke out.

...just touched my heart and made me go "Aww!" all the way! Even the "marriage" part, after a little "Whoops!" entered my thoughts just there, he, he. :D

But what the...? Did I get that right? "Freilassing road"? I had to read over that like ten times to believe it! Gosh! Seriously, Michael, you're crazy (but in a good way ;))! :D I will SO get back at you for this some day! LOL

Well, what more to say? Of course, I also liked the others' reactions to Kim & Ron dating, like Monique, Bonnie, Brick (I do believe I picked up on that "present", but just to be sure, does it have something to do with contraception? ;)), and of course, Kim's & Ron's families.

All in all, you gave us a great, heart-warming wrap-up of this amazing story, and did a fantastic job filling us in about the gaps between "Emotion Sickness" and "So the Drama". Thank you, Michael, for this wonderful and entertaining story! Hope there'll be much more to come! And you're most welcome, I'm flattered by being mentioned in your "thank yous" twice, even in bold letters once. ;)
Muzzlehatch chapter 23 . 1/25/2009
Beautifully written chapter, one of the best I've read. Kim shows us her mighty heart.
spectre666 chapter 28 . 1/25/2009
Very good intertwining of StD with your story. Brings in the common mistakes of the two with enough imaginative past events to make it new again. Very well done. Looking forward to your next.

Spectre
Comet Moon chapter 28 . 1/25/2009
The begining

Now if we can just talk Disney into fifth season or at least Movies

Well done

Ja ne

Jim
Katsumara chapter 28 . 1/25/2009
Amazing. Just amazing. The wait for the finale of yours was certainly worth it. From their conversation about the wait for them to finally get together, to interactions between them and other characters, it was all just so wonderful. I'm stunned by just how wonderful this was. :D

I did love the explanations of possible earlier kisses that could have come between them early early on. That could explain her statement in "Homecoming Upset" about how long it took him to kiss her. I loved how they hashed out their times with other people in their lives, about how Kim felt she was wrong for how jealous she'd get, and how bad of a friend she'd be, all the while Ron is being the best friend possible. You covered almost everything I could think of. I loved that part, and the kisses they shared in between those stories. That was fantastic. Oh, and the early proposal? Outstanding. Had me laughing so hard!

The conversation between Kim and Ron with the cheerleaders was pretty funny, along with Monique. Monique's just the best GBFF (Girl best friend forever).

The Ron and Brick convo... that was rather hysterical. Poor dumb jock. Loved Ron going all "big brother" on him about Monique's family. No wonder they ever dated or anything like that. He probably scared Brick half to death!

Ron and Dr.P's conversation in the van was fantastic. Couldn't have been handled better. Some stories have depicted James as a sort Dad that wouldn't be happy no matter what, and then there's stories where he's receptive. You had him as a little of both here, and it worked perfectly.

When they get home, I loved the bit about how everyone was going on the "Wedding talk" binge, haha. The Tweebs saying that they need to check Ron out, because no boy would want to date Kim... typical tweeb there. Perfect.

Then there's the bit with them on the couch at the end.. that was just so fluffy and sweet. The part about "Man, I keep forgetting" was just adorable. I could definitely picture that happening.

Either way, as you can see.. I'm so pleased with how wonderfully this turned out. Now you're going to have me hoping for a sort of second story picking up on their relationship or something. I bet that'd be a fantastic tale too! This story was just so epic though, from beginning (where Kim kept entertaining thoughts about dating Ron) all the way until the end, where it culminated in us finally seeing them dating. I can't express how much I love how you depict their early (EARLY) relationship budding here. I hope you keep writing. I really hope you do. ]

Thanks for writing this! Definitely one of my all time favorites.
Shrike176 chapter 28 . 1/24/2009
Now that's a great, and extremely thorough, wrap up. Really good conversation between Kim and Ron, after admitting their feelings they really needed to rethink a lot of their past relationship. Speaking of which, I really enjoyed the idea that Kim might have realized her feelings for Ron when they were much younger. I especially liked the implication that Kim only kissed Walter to make Ron jealous. Also enjoyed Ron saying he'd never have a sister, those a words that will come back to him; or will be mockingly repeated back to hm by Kim when Hana comes along. :)

Hilarious scene with Ron and Brick, that definitely explained why Brick and Monique never went out.

Good talk between Kim, Ron and James. I always felt that James gave Ron the mad scientist lecture mainly because he knew Kim and Ron dating would mean things becoming serious much faster than her dating some guy she'd known for a week or so. That said, it was nice of him to apologize for overreacting.

Overall, this was an excellent first story. Though after all this, I'd say a nice fluffy oneshot or short story would be in order. Congratulations on the award nominations.

Good work, can't wait to see what you come up with next!
waveform chapter 28 . 1/24/2009
I would like to have seen what happened on Memorial Day, but the references made here in the finale do help paint a picture of some not so good times between the members of Team Possible.

To say that Kim and Ron have been on an emotional roller coaster ride is a gross understatement. But then again, it looks like they've been on that ride for a good chunk of their lives. The transition between being just friends to being a couple can be awkward and just plain frightening. I think you showed very well that it was worse for Kim. Here's a person who always has to be in control, and she was discovering that, when it came to her feelings for Ron, she had no control. The aftermath of the Moodulator had to be horrifying for her.

Then there's Ron and his inferiority complex. He knew how he felt and it scared the heck out of him. Losing his best friend and the love of his life was a fate worse than death, so he kept her at bay to keep that from happening. But they got through it, and are stronger for it.

The bit with Ron jumping the gun on the marriage proposal was just brilliant! As was the scenario with Brik, and Ron's obliviousness of the quarterback's little care package. And let's not forget Ron going into "overprotective big brother mode" when Brik made his interest in Monique known. Well placed humor in something that could have very well been emotionally overpowering.

Good job, Michael. I initially wasn't too sure I could get into this story since I never watched "Gilmore Girls," but your characterizations drew me in like. Well done, buddy. Well done.
screaming phoenix chapter 28 . 1/24/2009
The wheel turns, and turns again. The ending and the beginning merge, become one, and in the ending a new beginning is formed. Confusion, uncertainty, secrets held, and hopes denied become clarity of thought, purposes unveiled, explanations reveled, hope and love rekindled, reinforced, and then brought to a glorious resolution.

For the first time in their young lives there are no barriers between them; all emotions in full view and with no turning back in the cards. Just when each is the most vulnerable, they reach out, connect, and show the pent up frustration and affection that both have suffered from for so long.

Great dialogue here, with all the associations and reminisces would only be possible with two friends with a lifetime of experiences between them. Two people so close that it would be impossible for an outsider to begin to understand the connection these two have.

It looks like Kim and Ron aren’t the only persons to mature here. .P. finally accepts Ron’s presence, dedication, and affection for his daughter. .P is still the far seeing matriarch of the Possible family who knew there was always something special between these two. The tweebs were perfect and Kim’s reaction; priceless.

The fact that Ron was so clueless about what Brick gave him was hilarious. Kim’s reaction to his blithenly holding them up for a more public viewing; precious

I think that when Kim finally explains to Ron just what they are and what you do with them, he may have a coronary or at least faint.

Remember Ron, breath through the nose; just keep

breathing... through the nose.

I think I have used every superlative possible in reviewing this tale of yours over the last ten months and I have worn out pages in my Thesaurus searching for more of them. I can only add a final Magnificent to a long list of comments about this tale. This is what Fan Fiction is all about. This is why it exists and why if it didn’t it would have to be invented.

No show, no matter how well intentioned, could show the passion, the rich characterizations, and the attention to detail that this has. It has been a privilege to read it and be a part of it. Thank You!

So what are you doing next?
Mr. Wizard chapter 28 . 1/24/2009
I believe this is the best wrap up of the Night of the Diablos that I have read. Wonderful summation of their preceding lives up to that point. You make a great case as to why they got together, and to some of us the more important argument that they would stay together.

I look forward to your next project.
CajunBear73 chapter 28 . 1/24/2009
Bravo Michael H., bravo!

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your first production posted on this site. From your first introductory chapter of Kim and Ron dancing all over the place from denial to exploration of their feelings for each other, to the final after-action-report of the Diablo mission and their history together, it was quite the journey those two made to reveal that they loved each other very much.

Kim seems to be growing still as she holds on tightly to Ron's claim to her heart, made finally at the BN storeroom. Ron is still Ron, but there's depths within he either doesn't know about or will not acknowledge, just yet. And Kim now knows of what she has beside her and who she will always love.

The back and forth at the prom after the only dance they had together really opened Kim's eyes and heart as Ron came clean about so many things between the two of them. Kim was no less open and forthcoming, but she's got some ground to make up to her boyfriend. But after Ron's overjoyed proposal, I thought Kim was going to start a search for the proper clergy to have on speed-dial when all settled down in their lives. The Ronster comes through again... whether he realized it or not, and in his own usual Ron-factor way.

Acceptance at school, even from Bonnie(?), to finalization of total acceptance from Kim's dad, the redhead heroine and her blonde hero/partner are settling in for the ride of their lives, together. Aunt June's blatherings of upcoming nuptials smugly seconded by Anne, who probably has some 'told you so' money coming to her, surround all but the tweebs who may be on their way to ICU if they continue to badger Kim about dating Ron.

Interesting moments with Kim, Ron and the misunderstood packaging received from Brick, almost sent the mood with James in the other direction than his musings of Ron's complete worth to him of his Kimmie-cub. LOL!

But Kim and Ron have made it to a very nice place from which to hang for a while in their new relationship. Kim is so very much aware of what it took to get there and is prepared to do what it takes to keep Ron with her, always.

So any plans in the works for a continuation of the journeys together with these two? Hope so and can't wait if you do.

CajunBear73

PS: A very good introduction to KP. Bravo to you, indeed!
Ms.VioletB.Hollister chapter 27 . 1/24/2009
Cool. Please update soon!

.Hollister
Dark Lady of the Sith chapter 27 . 1/13/2009
Heh, strange that Kim's listening to her own VA sing that song.

And this does explain So the Drama quite well...now perhaps it won't seem so rushed. :P

Fantastic job.

Update ASAP!
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