Reviews for Until That Day
SnapsForMadhuri chapter 10 . 7/31/2008

this story was going so well!
flyaway6 chapter 10 . 5/30/2008
DidemKinali chapter 10 . 5/26/2008
I just found this story an hour ago and I read it all! It's amazing! I love how in this chapter, you will make Nabooru not be brainwashed yet, but after, and that Impa and Zelda were warned by her! You are an amazing writer, and I will look forward to the chapter next!

I am apologizing for my terible English. :)
PourArriverAMoi chapter 10 . 5/26/2008
Whoa...Nabooru is the wrong girl to mess with!

Do you have a sister like that? Because it sounds pretty well described, not like something you just made up. I loved how you made Nabooru the one to show Impa and Zelda the plan, I never even thought of that! And this chapter is anything but half-assed.

Seldavia chapter 10 . 5/26/2008
Yay, new chapter!

The bit about Nabooru's sister seemed a little abrupt at first, and in the beginning I wondered if this was a hasty explanation. But I changed my mind after it got more in depth about Nabooru's relationship with her sister, and the obvious venom between them. It gives a reasonable explanation as to why Nabooru would commit an act like this.

Believe it or not, I never imagined Nabooru being the one tipping off Impa and Zelda, though here it makes perfect sense. I always figured Impa got the information from a Shekiah network or something. I liked the little extra bit about her learning the language, because even if Impa spoke Gerudo, Nabooru's attempt to speak Hylian would be a gesture of trust.

Well, even if you thought it was half-assed, I thought it was good, and I'm curious to see what Nabooru's thinking toward the end when she has to seal Ganondorf away as a Sage.
PourArriverAMoi chapter 9 . 5/12/2008
Ah! I almost cried when Nabs kept stating that she was strong..That's all she's used to, she never could cry because it was useless! I cry everytime something sad happens. Poor Nabs...

AWESOME CHAPTER! Really good way to let out the plan. I look forward to the tenth!
Seldavia chapter 9 . 5/12/2008
Firstly, I think that you had the right level of emotion. You don't want to cheapen it by making it melodramatic, and Ganondorf's sudden personality change also provokes a strong reaction from the reader. The description in your writing and it would be hard for the reader not to be moved by all that has happened.

Now, here's the part I don't understand, and maybe I'm not supposed to yet. Why exactly did Nabooru's mother have to die? I understood Ganondorf's explanation in terms of making Nabooru vulnerable by eliminating her support system (he does that in one of my fics too). But...he took an interest in Nabooru because she is pretty, I guess...when she was nine? And he's going through all this trouble to keep her just for fun? It seems like an awful lot of work to me. Why did he go through all the trouble of gaining her confidence if all he had to do was brainwash her? Would she have even gotten suspicious if not for all the attempts on her life?
PourArriverAMoi chapter 1 . 4/15/2008
o0o! Nabs is smart! And I love little Ruto! so cute...THE SUSPENSE! the plan is will Nabooru take it, I wonder? And how will Ganondorf tell her? and what is mita's scar about?

tune in next update

Seldavia chapter 8 . 4/15/2008
Oh good, finally got to read a new chapter. Lots of action and mystery, and good-old-fashioned Nabooru attitude. But it seemed a little rushed, as I noticed a number of misspellings and some repeating sentences like this one:

I knew enough about dagger wounds from trying to live in the alleyways of Hyrule Market to know about dagger wounds.
Seldavia chapter 7 . 4/15/2008
You left a sentence hanging:

"Do you miss you mother, little girl?" The one with the red gem asked. Once she said this I felt

Other than that, very well written, I liked that you put more description and emotion into this chapter.
PourArriverAMoi chapter 7 . 4/15/2008
Yay! I love how much editing you've done! You've done a fabulous job of adding in tidbits that help make a clearer background about all of this.

PS: I noticed what the plot hole was, but you took it out. I won't say it here, to avoid possible embarrasment...But way to be subtle! It took me a while.

Seldavia chapter 5 . 4/11/2008
I can't see where the plot holes were. Maybe I wasn't looking hard enough? Not seeing any major changes that jump out at me.
Seldavia chapter 4 . 4/5/2008
Not really much to say, other than it's just more polished and flows more smoothly. It was good to begin with, after all, though it was a little skeletal before.
Alise chapter 4 . 4/4/2008
Awesome story!

I can't wait for the next chapter! Keep up the great work! :D
Dee chapter 4 . 4/3/2008
Oh jeezus, this story is amazing!

I love it! Please crank out some more chapters A.S.A.P...

17 | Page 1 2 Next »