|Reviews for White Rain|
| loveitasakuxx chapter 27 . 8/20
M not fond of itaxoc.. But this was just.. Wow. Literally wow.. I laughed, i cried, i njoyd this to the core.
Write more. Ur way of writing is beautiful. Dont stop it.
| Guest chapter 17 . 7/29
Not the biggest fan of the melodrama going on. Sasuke blurting out that he won't support her doesn't feel natural. I feel like he'd suggest an abortion offhandedly, like, "Well, get rid of it." or something. Or even saying, "You're on your own." comes off sounding more natural than the technical terms that these characters are using. The wording seriously took me out of the story. And then Itachi rudely putting in his two cents where it doesn't belong. Despite the pressure he feels, would he really have felt that it was his place ordering his uncle, whose respect he's been so desperate to earn, around? Not acting the least afraid? And Naruto bursting into the house... I know these are his best friends, but he's the Hokage. Wouldn't it have made more sense to summon Sasuke under the guise of important business, lest he lose face? Such abuse of power in the face of his clansmen seems gross to me. I can't imagine watching the most powerful and respected person intrusted to lead his people storming away from the government building in a huff because his best friend did something dumb in his personal life. What? Are we in middle school? Why do people feel the need to tell Sasuke who he "belongs" to anyway? He's a friggin adult. I find it excessively silly and forced. Probably because I don't believe in soulmates.
| Guest chapter 7 . 7/27
| apolausta chapter 27 . 7/19
It's been over a year since you've finished this story, so I'm not sure if you're still reading reviews - but I just stumbled across it and finished it all in the span of a night and half a morning, and felt compelled to leave one.
Because this was genuinely, fantastically, brilliantly, stunningly amazing. The world that you crafted and the way that you weaved it into canon; the fact that you started this story in 2008 and it rings true to me, even now, even considering canon; your original characters, so flawed, fleshed out, and human; everything, really. I adored everything about this.
I'll admit to being a bit tentative going in, but was honestly already fully convinced by the end of the first chapter.
I only have one pretty small caveat concerning the dialogue. Sometimes, places where contraction felt more natural had the words spelled out fully, which made the dialogue feel a little formal and stilted in places where I don't think you were going for that effect. One example is the beginning of chapter 20: Sakura says "I am sure your sister is fine!" instead of "I'm sure": which to me feels much more natural. I think it particularly jarred me in chapter 17, when Sakura confided in Ino (and Lucia) about Sasuke being an ass. Tensions and emotions were high, which usually means less formal speech, which is why sentences such as "I do not think tea will help me," "You are so good to Sasuke," and "I will help you with anything you need...I will be happy to" just seemed really out of place to me. I've never heard anyone speak like that in reality.
But it's honestly such a small issue, and I only bring it up (I usually don't leave criticism, at all) *because* everything else was so brilliant, and this was the one thing that stuck out to me. I think there are so many things I want to praise that's it's paradoxically harder for me to articulate it, whereas the one caveat was easily summarized. Ugh, typical.
Though I'll try my best anyway. For a character that never appeared outside of flashbacks, your portrayal of (Uchiha) Itachi was absolutely gorgeous. So in-character, so believable, and so shockingly sad. The development of Sasuke's feelings and his handling of them was believable, and while I don't support Sakura and Sasuke together in canon (alas), I enjoyed how you wrote them together. And Naruto! I love love LOVE how you wrote Naruto. This is the post-epilogue Naruto we deserve in canon. This is the Hokage I envision Naruto being - capable, assured, confident, and happy. What is the madness we actually got, I swear. God damn it Kishimoto. (Which is why I'm so grateful for fanfics like yours that set the record straight.)
And of course all your OCs! I enjoyed reading about Itachi and Rina, and even Amaya, Haro, and Yukio, but I think the star was Lucia. I fell in love with Lucia's character - her strengths, her weaknesses, her flaws, her motivations, her ambitions, everything. She was so strong, but understandably so. I felt that she wasn't just strong to have a strong female character, which made me so happy.
I really admire how you built up suspense and intrigue. Honestly, I had to wake up at 6:00am and it was 5:30am and I was still reading this fic, and I had no regrets. I still have no regrets.
This review is getting long enough, but basically thank you, thank you, thank you with all my heart for writing and sharing this story. I hope writing continues to bring you much joy in the future.
| supergoddessdi chapter 27 . 6/11
this story is absolutely amazing. please don't stop writing!
| Ebony Soul Crimson Tears chapter 7 . 4/28
Oops I was going to say that I hope that Itachi gets trained by Naruto or Sasuke but I mostly want him to be trained by Sasuke.
| Ebony Soul Crimson Tears chapter 7 . 4/28
| Hushed.Fable chapter 27 . 4/12
It has almost been a year since the completion of White Rain, and the storyline still amazes me. You didn't just do a masterful read on Itachi's character but you also created the most intriguing, complicated original character who is also motivated by greater principles to match Itachi (and yet is so incredibly human). Because the thing about Itachi is that I feel he is like Nietzche's ubermensch: there can't be any further character development with him because Kishimoto made him into the embodiment of moral judgment, and it's really inhuman to be so sacrificial and dedicated to a perceived greater good, thus making him unrelatable. But then you totally humanized him with the whole "creating a genjutsu but it's not really real or is it" scenario. Wow. Just wow. That part blew my mind, like are you a fan of Russian or classical Chinese literature?
And oh my god the other original characters. So good. Naruto (anime and manga) starts off as this fun story of kids who want to become basically soldiers, and you were not messing around and had Itachi face the realities of that like, "no kid. We're ninjas. We keep secrets even from each other. We're learning to kill and give up the parts of us that make us human to become better soldiers."
I'm not a fan of Sasuke/Sakura just because I think that whole relationship was fucked up from the beginning (and I also have this theory that Sakura is a manifestation of Kishimoto's secretly sexist/misogynistic tendencies). But they're a canon couple, sooo meh. I think I like your portrayal of Sakura better than the original.
ugh geez. I could really go on and on. Anyways, thanks for finishing this story. It was probably no easy task, and I really appreciate you putting the effort you did into this story.
| sketchywolf chapter 27 . 3/25
wow i just finshed this you should keep going with the it in the boruto genratoin
| urbangoddess212 chapter 27 . 3/20
This is one of the best fanfics I've read. I wasn't anticipating loving the characters you created so much! This story took you 7 years to complete and 5 days to read. I'm sad this is your last fanfic but I'm sure you will have no problems publishing your orinal work. Amazing story!
| Hulkishpower chapter 27 . 3/6
That was an absolute masterpiece. Holy crap. I am a big fan of Itachi Uchiha and what you did with him was just so painfully beautiful and spot on with his character. I do hope to see a little side story with young Itachi scaring some managers with his prowess with an abacus or something like that, but I see you have other intentions. What is your original work called? I want to read it.
| Sea chan chapter 27 . 2/29
Im so into yukioxrina! I love your OC's. I would live to read some original work from you! :)
| who.am.I.2000 chapter 27 . 1/23
This was beautiful. I loved it. You are such a good writer! And I loved the little Yukio x Rina. Itachi will have a heart attack when he find out! XD Anyways, I hope you continue writing amazing stories like this one, be them Naruto fanfiction or your own creation. :)
| uchiha akin chapter 8 . 11/28/2015
hard to imagine Konohamaru being just an academy teacher...so much for succeeding Naruto as hokage
| uchiha akin chapter 5 . 11/28/2015