|Reviews for White Rain|
| White Rain chapter 18 . 7/17
My sister is playing Dynamite, and when the guy said, "I wanna celebrate and live my wife," I said, "I wanna celebrate and text my wife." I just thought you ought to know.
| Maryam Clarus chapter 27 . 5/10
you ddontknow how much confusion, suspence, happiness and sadness you have put me through! I was so confused was that really how Itachi felt, if Lucia was really a villain that plans to destroy konoha. The story was well-written and thought of, It was a roller coaster ride reading this, I just had to finish this in one day. I was so hooked, the mystery that is Lucia and Itachi really hooks the reader and the children were so.. so.. gaahhh I can put it into words. I love how it moved from one POV to the next, reading how they thought of the OCs and their situation. Thank you so much for this wonderful story! I really really love it! one of the best fanfiction in Naruto fandom
| tracep22 chapter 1 . 3/21
this was an amazing read, well done!
| emiiholderz chapter 27 . 3/10
Pure gold !
| grizzybear69 chapter 22 . 1/4
| Larisha chapter 27 . 12/13/2017
OMG this was one FUCKING GOOD FANFIC.I was crying like literally when Sasuke was story was beautiful and was just simply an AMAZING WRITER and all the best for the 't WAIT for the next gozaimasu for everything.
| Guest chapter 27 . 10/8/2017
Great characters. Interesting additions to narutoverse. I liked it.
| Destrark chapter 4 . 6/14/2017
Mmm. Annoyed at some bits. But they're pretty much stuff that got established past the point this story was written. Something sticks out though. That bit with Ino saying she wouldn't be able to lift the basket of food like Chouji could? That's ridiculous. She's strong enough to fight a Zombie Asuma in taijutsu after all.
| meilin chapter 27 . 4/29/2017
Someone must've hurt Aquarius real bad... why are they so pressed? Tf? The people on this site are so toxic and willing to write a goddamn research paper in order to shit on people's hard work and talent with a few flowery sentences and SAT vocab words. Let it go, y'all are just pressed with nothing else to do with your lives.
| yo1999 chapter 27 . 3/5/2017
i just discovered this story and i absolutely love it and you writing style
| Magda chapter 27 . 2/26/2017
Hey, I absolutely adored this story... I found it on a sleepless night and read it in one sitting, you're an amazing writer and I love your work! xoxo
| King-Cactus chapter 1 . 2/11/2017
I was going to comment on something I had written down, but missed in my review (had to reread it again), and, lo and behold, someone emotionally hurt enough to question and attack another’s criticism with such a puerile disposition so fitting of this fandom. Perhaps, it should have occurred to the ‘hurt’ individual that the aspects I did highlight did not work as they were intended to? You know, the insertion of western mores into an eastern culture and the lack of craft to meld them together to present something coherent and plausible for a decent social commentary? I even stated so explicitly. Reading comprehension is a terrible issue here, it seems. The author can read this as well, as it concerns her lack of grasp of basic manga-characterizations quite intimately. Maybe, I was not thorough enough. So, here it goes.
Ah, the dreaded 'pairing-defense-force' start of an insipid argument and the cast of the shadow of a bleeding ‘Romantic’ on such a reserved, introverted and cold individual. Did you actually read that Sasuke in Gaiden is aloof and cold enough to disregard the entirety of your ‘desperate’ attempts at undermining canon characterization where he has seldom ‘over-shared’ or given more ‘room’ to anyone to tread into his personal life (before that, he was explicitly defensive of his personal boundaries)? He claimed so before Naruto at Orochimaru’s hideout. Can you name one incident of canon-Sasuke (any Godforsaken version) divulging the intimate details of his personal life before anyone or allowing anyone to interfere in his life in this manner? Any version would do. He is also thirty-two years old there, older than the version presented here. So, these silly claims about 'how people grow' and the related hodge-podge of idiocy is nothing more than your version of characters.
How about his complete absence for a span of more than a decade despite possessing an ability that allows him to visit dimensions (yes, different dimensions) at the cost of a mild cool-down – he was on the outskirts of Konoha when Sarada found him and still he didn’t go home? In the movie, he went to Naruto first, then spent the night in the forest, then met his daughter ... his attitude remained the same; indifferent and disinterested. I love the ‘over-reading’ done by the loopy fanbase here. When there is literally no excuse for him to not make a few trips to his supposed 'beloved (whom he has given insane leeway in this fiction; he hardly even talks to her in the manga and beyond)' even once a week, let alone years. But, I am sure you will have a laughable and imbecilic comeback for this one as well, crafted out of hours upon hours of staring at red circles and arrows drawn over manga pages to make sense of appalling and unintelligent arguments by those dreadful and ruefully stupid Tumblr whelps.
I can also assume that your hilariously self-made, joke of a perspective might have missed the canon novelization of Boruto: The Movie or the Databook released with the movie that claim that he left again after defeating Kinshiki and Momoshiki? But, yes. The fault lies with an objective observer who said nothing about the pairing in this story itself being an issue, but rather, how poorly it was handled and presented. And how tone-deaf it was if contrasted with canon material. Should I attack your fumbles with comprehension again? That ironic use of 'malarkey' was a nice touch, though. Now, why did I include Gaiden when this work was completed before it? To show the author (and you) that Sasuke has remained consistent when it comes to his core personality traits. At best, he appreciates Sakura's love. Even that is a moot argument. But, feel free to bleat along with the herd. No one is going to stop you.
Have you ever, perhaps, touched any anthropological book on marriages? It doesn’t seem that way as SS, for all intents and purposes, is a marriage of convenience for an heir. The kind the Heian period promoted. And, shockingly, Kishimoto’s work is rooted in Japanese history. But, alas, marriage cannot survive without romance where you reside, hence the reason why the author received such a harsh criticism; her desperation to fix, fix and fix things through her skewed western perspective in an offensive attempt to apply brush strokes of ‘cultural supremacy’ over her material were reprehensible. Maybe, it slipped your notice, but it didn’t slip mine.
So, the vehement claims about ‘what I do not understand’ about characters can be pointed at yourself, who probably has read a few summaries from Narutopedia rather than actually investing her scattered attention on what the material (for 12-year-old, whippersnappers at that; wow, reading manga is too hard) itself presents. Hasn't read a word on Japanese culture and how it's a 'culture of shame' rather than a 'culture of fear' western ideologies work on. It’s all right. It’s not entirely your fault. You belong from such an abhorrent fanbase that the responses and attacks come out like the automatic reactions of a windup toy; they are predictable and silly. Because, if you were mature enough, you could have taken this to PMs rather than opening a venue for more 'assholes' to slip through. Good job! Anyhow, I am absolutely disgusted with myself that I have even replied to this person, when I never do. Oh well, minor indulgences are all right and I do believe an 'in-depth' dismantling of the caricatural romance was in order. The author can take cues if she feels like it.
That aside, the point I forgot to add in this second ‘reserved review’ was about the money trail. How exactly did the money find its way through the channels from the ‘grand’ western nations to the 'fabled' Japanese lands? That is something you have never explained in a way that would lend credence to your ‘economic’ factors highlighted through the Houses. It doesn’t even seem that you have done any research on this and just went with this on a whim. You should have done some research on money-trails, money laundering and white collar crimes to add depth to your narrative. Yet, you did none of that. It all comes across as highly superficial and unconvincing as a result as a few bits of remarks in haphazard dialogues are not enough to shoulder the entire framework of your tale, which is why is falls apart by the tenth chapter beyond repair.
Last but not least, you have a lot of potential. As a professional writer, I would advise you to not take up the task of writing too many characters. You appear to lack the skill to create round ones when your narrative scheme is supposed to be based on the plots where the characters are meant to drive it. Had it been the other, plot-driven, narrative-scheme, then caricatures like Sakura, Rina and Lucia etc. would have sufficed. Charles Dickens’ works are littered with them. I cannot see how anyone else cannot work with the material. Choose the narrative that fits the plot, as at the end of the day, without the proper blending of story and plot, your narrative will always look halfhearted and messy.
| Amanthya chapter 1 . 2/11/2017
P.S. Ignore Aquarius. Any helpful criticism is buried under pretentious malarkey that entirely misses the point of your story - the deliberate mixing of two different land's cultures, regardless of canon being a Japanese-inspired setting - and the changes people undergo both from age and experience, and unforeseen events (among other things).
A's complete lack of understanding of why Sasuke would let Sakura influence so much of his life is a fine example of their dismissal of canon and the inability to understand the way human beings make allowances for those we love that enables them to influence us in ways others may disagree with.
One doesn't have to personally like Sakura to accept that a) they are a canon-established couple b) they are together in this fic, nothing readers can do about it and c) we don't have to feel about Sakura as Sasuke does-we only have to believe he does as seen by behavior that consistently displays his feelings about her.
You set this fic in a universe that accepts canon couples. You show characters engaging in behavior that displays their feelings, which remain consistent even when they don't know what to do about the other person's actions. You did your job as an author.
I wish you luck on your original endeavors. I think you will do well.
| Amanthya chapter 27 . 2/10/2017
I resisted this story for so long; afraid of the melodrama I was certain it contained. Finally, the curiosity got me, and I clicked on it.
I didn't stop reading it every second I could until I finished it.
This is a wonderful fic. I don't even like Sasuke or really know Itachi, but you have made them real. You made me feel Sasuke's pain, Itachi (jr)'s confused longing, Lucia's wariness, Rina's depth of emotion (despite not naturally feeling as she does as a deeply emotional artist). You made me fraught over Sakura's struggle. Smile at Hinata's faith, grin at Ino and Chouji's welcome (and believe in the pairing in a way I never did before). Enjoy the brief but deep appearances of minor characters as they add to the richness of this fic-verse. You made me understand the points of view of characters who don't think like me, and respect choices I wouldn't have thought to make. You had the decency to add complexity where other authors would lazily ignore things like Rina and Gerard's lingering affection or Lucia's complicated relationship with pain (realism).
But what I loved most was this: you made Naruto a credible Hokage who remained true to himself in a changing world. You made Itachi a lead I could like and believe in, even when it was Rina who inherited the spirit of her father (which you cleverly hid until the end). And you, in giving Sasuke both a family and the freedom to embrace it, gave me an incredible peace to my heart that canon failed to deliver on.
I have little love for Sasuke, and think little on Sakura. But Naruto loves them, and Hinata follows his lead, and I do love them. Naturally their happiness is not complete when the other parts of the team 7-trio remain in pain. I never realized how much Sasuke and Sakura being happy would let me believe in my actual favorite couple's happiness.
I feel like I'm gushing over-long in this chapteresque review. But this will likely be my only in depth comment on your story. So I wanted to show that I was paying attention, and convey my deep gratitude for sharing with us here on ffdotnet.
Thank you: this story is a masterpiece.
| Amanthya chapter 9 . 2/8/2017
I like the way you handled the team test and formation. The reasoning behind their actions was believable from what we saw of the characters previously. I also like that Itachi isn't a typical chip-on-his-shoulder spitfire Gary Stu. I like him. Rina, too.