|Reviews for I Wasn't Expecting That!|
| dwatlaskrhtcm chapter 7 . 4/23/2011
Awwww Very Cute Especially The Last Bit , I Got Abit Confuse In The Middle Though , Well Done And Thanks .
| dwatlaskrhtcm chapter 6 . 4/23/2011
Love It , Look Forward Jack's Reaction To When Tanwen Gets Back , Well Done And Thanks .
| dwatlaskrhtcm chapter 5 . 4/23/2011
I Love This Story It's So Cute , Well Done And Thanks .
| dwatlaskrhtcm chapter 4 . 4/23/2011
HaHa , Lol , The Last Bit Made Me Laugh Out Loud , Well Done And Thanks .
| dwatlaskrhtcm chapter 1 . 4/23/2011
Oooo I Love The First Chapter , Looking Forward To Ianto's Reaction And Jack's , Well Done And Thanks .
| Spazzer Monkey chapter 7 . 1/18/2011
Cute story, but it felt a bit rushed, especially in the epilogue. You probably could've gone straight to the bit where she comes home and turned the rest into a sequel. All said and done though, it was very cute.
| InsanityisReal chapter 7 . 10/2/2009
I loved this story. Very clever.
| JantoForever21 chapter 7 . 9/9/2009
Aww... I loved the whole story!
| JantoForever21 chapter 4 . 9/9/2009
Haha, loved the end.
| Jessie Blackwood chapter 7 . 7/24/2009
love happy endings. Warm fuzzies are fine, hope you have more...
| vivelabookworm chapter 7 . 7/7/2009
Aw! I just got the warm fuzzies from reading this! So cute! D Haha, I love the way Tanwen introduced herself at the beginning. She's definitely Jack's daughter. LOL
| sexybeardedlover chapter 7 . 11/5/2008
oh i loved that. jack and ianto parents and family and stuff so cute!
| sexybeardedlover chapter 5 . 11/5/2008
i dont care how long it is. this was my favourite chapter so far. warm and fuzzy. it was just so lovely and nice and happy
| IndeMaat chapter 1 . 9/18/2008
I found Tanwen strangely likeable. Usually, rude OC that comes bursting through the door make me role my eyes and wonder why the Torchwood Team doen't grab them by the nape of the neck and toss them back out into the street. I think it is because Tanwen is actually witty.
There are two bits of criticism I'd like to make. One has to do with punctuation. The sentence below is an example. The problem occurs throughout the story:
* “I have paperwork to do Jack,” Jack nodded sadly as Ianto slid off of Jack’s desk and walked to the door.
The comma at the end of the dialogue indicates that a speech tag will follow. However, nodding is not a form of speaking, so the comma should have been a full stop. Also, the dialogue is Ianto's and the action Jack's. That's a bit confussing and it would look better (i.e. not confussing) if the dialogue and action in one paragraph belong to the same person; thus different paragraphs for different people acting and/or speaking.
* Jack grinned as the Welshman left the office, “You’d better be,” he murmured to himself.
Similar problem in this sentence. The first comma makes it look like the first part of the sentence is a speech tag, which it isn't. That also should be a full stop. The second comma is correctly used to indicate a speech tag, as murmurring is a form of speaking.
My second problem is that Tanwen tells Jack and Ianto she's their daughter and they somehow immediately assume biological daughter. Maybe Jack can assume this, because of his biology, but when he asks Owen for a DNA test to prove she's their daughter, Owen should give him a lecture about how adopted children and their parents don't have the same DNA. I don't think Owen is aware yet that men can get pregnant, so he should respond accordingly.
As to your worry that one chapter was longer: one solution is to try and combine a few of the other chapters so they become longer too. The average chapter length is about 750-800 words, which is rather short. But that probably matters less now that the story is finished and it can just be read in one go.
| Murderbynuns chapter 7 . 6/16/2008
oh you rock I still love this story though it would have been nice to have seen her intract with everyone in the past more and maby a bit more about when she got home but other then that I loved it.