Reviews for A Secret for How Long
Angel Spirit chapter 10 . 12/12/2008
*twitches* You leave us off in another evil cliffhanger...*glares playfully* however, you DID update...yay! This excites me, I like it when fics come back to life after being left off for while...~v I'll agree w/u though when you said in your AN that real life tends to take over writing...

ANYWAY...poor Alan...people just seem to have it out for the kid these days...but Alan fics where he's hurt or angsting make the best fics, so I'm all for them ~v I'm glad that Scott was able to hold onto him for that time that they were in the water and even happier that Virgil made the call for them to stay until they fished them out! I hope that Alan's going to be okay, I can only imagine what Scott's going to say to him though once he found out that he hid the injury! Though if Alan *wanted* too he could say that he got it on the mission...ah...well, I'll just have to wait until the next chapter to see what happens next.
Gilian 101 chapter 10 . 12/12/2008
Howdy there,

I just read this fic, and I thought "Hmm, not bad." I like you way that you portray the older siblings, I think a number of us authors follow the 'over-protective' line of thought. There are only a few who can get the balance just right (like 'Little Miss Bump, Letting the Rain in, ciminally charmed, Sam1...and so on). But I think you're nearly there. The storyline is good, and isn't too rushed. I'd like to see a little bit more fluff, just to make it more realistic. At the moment, things are just a little bit...dry and empty. But it's good, don't get me wrong!

Only major problem I could find is with your spelling. There are a number of 'their/they're/there' problems that really distract from the story. But the dialogue is realistic and well written, so the story is still good.

I'd advise you to get a beta-reader (or, if you already have one, sack them and get a better beta-reader). The authors that I mentioned above are all beta-readers (at least I'm sure that LMB, CC and Sam1 are). And, with the quality of their fics, you would definitely have a fully proof-read chapter to post.

Good luck with your writing, and update soon. Peace out.

Gilly xox
thunderincrimson chapter 10 . 12/12/2008
No! bad cliffhanger, bad! Alan you ok? Scott, John help you baby brother! Alan!

anyway...sure was a long wait for this chapter...I was loosing hope to read it! - Glad you're back, I've missed your story and I can't wait to read the next! kisses
Ells chapter 10 . 12/12/2008
OH MY GOD! Brilliant chapter almost worth the incredibly long wait. Sadly no thanksgiving were I am x
zookitty chapter 10 . 12/11/2008
Yay I new chapter! Thank you for posting. Great job, can't wait for the next update...what can I say? I'm needy. haha
criminally charmed chapter 10 . 12/11/2008
Oh, poor Alan. At least I have never drowned him...At least, I don't think I did. Broke his arm...but not his wrist...Huh. Guess I can't say much except...UPDATE SOON! I am almost as frantic as Jeff will be.
Little Miss Bump chapter 10 . 12/11/2008
Oh my goodness! Alan's having trouble breathing AND his wrist is broken! This is bad. This is very bad. It sounds like Alan's suffering from secondary drowning, where the small amount of water trapped in the lungs begins to cause the lining of the lung to swell so that breathing becomes harder. Am I right? It certainly sounds like some form of drowning! But we'll just have to wait and see, won't we?

Yay, you're back! I was wondering where this story had wondered off to. But it's nice to see that you've continued with this story, you left us on a bit of a cliffee last time.

Happy writing!
S.H.I.E.LD.13 chapter 10 . 12/11/2008
You have posted after such a long time, and now you are leaving us with a cliffy? Oh the torture!
UltimateOptimist chapter 10 . 12/11/2008
Uh-oh! Hope alan's ok fab UD
twilight776685 chapter 9 . 11/9/2008
this is amazing
twilight776685 chapter 4 . 10/31/2008
This is one amazing story. Can you please try to update it
roxy chapter 9 . 10/27/2008
PLEASE UPADATE it is so great I need to know what happens to alan. I'm suffocating here!

no pressure ;)
Iaveina chapter 9 . 10/18/2008
PLEASE UPDATE! AH! AMAZING! D
zookitty chapter 9 . 10/12/2008
OHMIGOSH MORE!
Dia Athene chapter 9 . 10/6/2008
wow. this is interesting! cant wait for your update. :)
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