|Reviews for Secret Heart|
| DarkVoid116 chapter 11 . 10/12/2012
I sort of understand why Videl left the Son household in such a rush; she was really feeling the effects of her emotions and having Gohan carry her back would have only intensified her feelins. Still, though, she only hurt Gohan. I'm sure she, a very smart girl, could have came up with a better way of doing things.
I like how Videl gave Erasa "permission" yet sneakily made it so Erasa never had an opportunity to ask Gohan out.
Flying lessons next chapter, eh? Cool.
| DarkVoid116 chapter 10 . 10/12/2012
This chapter had its ups and its downs. I enjoyed the interactions between Gohan and Lime.
Lime is the oft-forgotten character and has a bad rep. Sure, I don't enjoy her as a potential romantic interest of Gohan, but I definitely do not mind her in a friendly role, like this.
I think it was necessary to speed up Videl's acceptance of her obvious feelings, though. Realizing she was extremely jealous is gonna speed up this process big time.
So, yeah, loved it xD
| DarkVoid116 chapter 9 . 10/12/2012
Awww, Videl was self-conscious about wearing a bikini. Guess she didn't want Gohan getting a peek at her goods. The swimming scene was fantastic, what with their race, more Gohan/Videl drama, and of course the underwater kiss.
The underwater kiss was a cool idea, but (and I have no experience kissing underwater) I'm not entirely sure that would work. Hm, whatever, it was cool!
Lastly, I'm really happy Videl had an erotic dream about Gohan. I'm glad Gohan was outside and listened to their conversation. It was really awesome, it gave Gohan his first insight into her feelings (not like there weren't a *thousand* hints, but I digress)...
| DarkVoid116 chapter 8 . 10/12/2012
Vegeta, THE PRINCE OF ALL SAIYANS!
I enjoyed this too.
They nearly kissed on their own accord! Aw man that would have been awesome :(
Videl has so many thoughts to sort through now that she knows Gohan loves her. She *really* likes Gohan and it seems she is beginning to come to terms with this fact.
Goten nearly spilled secrets this chapter! His inclusion should continue to bring another dynamic to this story since it's clear he cannot keep his mouth shut. Videl will find out about Saiyans soon enough, but luckily Chi Chi and her swimming comment saved Gohan. For now.
| DarkVoid116 chapter 7 . 10/12/2012
How do you keep my on the edge of my seat at all times?
So, Videl now knows Gohan's in love with her. Where does she go from here. Confront him? Hide her feelings? At least she doesn't have to be so dang depressed about Gohan's denial of his feelings earlier in the chapter. She knows the true depths of his feelings now.
Videl 3 She's so adorable, pouting when Gohan says he feels nothing for her.
There's a sad lack of Erasa in this chapter, but the inclusion of more Chi Chi and the introduction of Goten compensates for that.
Goten was so so soooo adorable, making them explore the depths of their feelings for each other even more.
Chi Chi's nagging and insisting created problems but also sped up the development of their relationship, which was awesome.
| DarkVoid116 chapter 6 . 10/12/2012
I love, love, love this chapter!
So, it's out in the open! Videl knows that Gohan is the Great Saiyaman because they're the same kisser! That's ingenious and if Videl weren't trying to prove they're one in the same I'd have an issue with it. As it is, it's brilliant! Love it!
Erasa is so funny, you've made her extremely enjoyable while simultaneously limiting the amount of Sharpner, all good/great things.
The note-passing sequence was adorable, although it might have been brash for Gohan to admit freely to Videl that he thought she was "beautiful" and a "great girl"...He seems to naive and shy to say that outright, although it was extremely obvious, especially given his staring.
So, now they're headed to Mount Paozu for a weekend with the Sons! Fantastic! Yaaaaay :D
| DarkVoid116 chapter 5 . 10/12/2012
SHARPNERRRRR! I love Sharpner, he's the man! He often gets ridiculed and used as a scapegoat and a dirtbag in fics.
That said, it still annoys me when he "claim"s Videl as his. I'm glad Erasa spilled that Gohan and Videl shared a kiss, it put Sharpner somewhat in his place, yay.
What a bold move! She kissed him!
Love the chapter. I haven't said it yet, but this is very well written; I've noticed minimal grammar errors, and it's fluent and easy to read. I'm really enjoying it.
| DarkVoid116 chapter 4 . 10/12/2012
I looooooove this chapter. It introduced sooo much drama into the mix.
First off, Gohan should have agreed to continue the spar at that point. It's entirely obvious that Videl does *not* hate him, she's just frustrated with how much he incessantly hides stuff from her.
The actual spar, with Gohan's ki heavily suppressed, seemed rather believable, since he was making a concerted effort to *not* inflict too much damage. Fics with an overpowered Videl annoy me, but this wasn't the case here.
The way the chapter began made me laugh, lol. Especially Gohan's phone conversation with his mother; so Videl is gonna meet Chi Chi? Yay. That should be awesome.
Muscles! Muscles! Muscles! Videl has now seen what Gohan's extremely buff muscles look like under his loose shirts! Yay!
| DarkVoid116 chapter 3 . 10/12/2012
Hahahaha, the final line of this chapter (which was once again awesome btw) had me chuckling.
So, they're gonna fight, eh? That should be pretty awesome. He really needs to keep his ki way suppressed though or he's *really* gonna hurt her.
Satan manor is always depicted as huge in fics and in the anime, so that was expected.
The first "Gohan" secrets have been revealed. Videl now knows that Gohan is the son of Son Goku and Son Chi Chi, knows Goku is dead, and has inferred a preliminary connection between Gohan stopping training and Goku's death, a true story.
So, yeah, nice chapter :D
| DarkVoid116 chapter 2 . 10/12/2012
I love this story. This chapter set up a lot of new things.
I really wish Gohan would have less, I dunno, awkward in his reply to Videl. It's obvious that he loves her, and it's obvious that she reciprocates his feelings at least somewhat. I mean, she *responded*. Is he really that naive to not realize that the simple fact that she responded speaks volumes? Hmm, it'll play out eventually I suppose.
I like how Erasa acted. She really is, until Gohan enters the picture in canon, the sole person who actually understands Videl. She understands her feelings regarding crime fighting, boys, her father, etc.
Gohan also needs to not lose his concentration. If he isn't going to have his ki heavily suppressed- and judging by the baseball comment he isn't- then he needs to be careful, especially around someone as aggresive and abrasive as Videl.
Overall, this creates quite a plight for Gohan and Videl, it's gonna be great to see how it plays out.
| DarkVoid116 chapter 1 . 10/12/2012
A great introductory chapter. I found the inserts in italics to be really interesting and insightful. The fact that Gohan was *so* darned bold caught me off guard, but it definitely made for an interesting plot. It's going to be *really* interesting to see how Gohan deals with the likely firestorm that's going to result from his actions.
Your Videl is quite intelligent, it seems, and it also seems like she might be harboring secret feelings for Gohan as well which would add an interesting early dynamic to this.
Excellent first chapter.
| number1dbzgal chapter 30 . 10/5/2012
pleazzzzzz finish. i love it and i want to read the ending. pleeeeaaazzzz do not discontinue this.
| Guest chapter 30 . 7/31/2012
Also because of you I am writing a GxV fic myself.
| Guest chapter 30 . 7/31/2012
you have got to continue. If you don't, it will be one of the biggest cliffhangers in the world. I have read a lot of GxV fics and I have to say this is in my top three. MY number one is Together by ICHeart. Yours in number two. Finally My number three is Sinful. SO YOU NEED TO CONTINUE IT. :)
| NinjaReads chapter 30 . 7/21/2012
Making review number 300!
Anyways, hope you update soon. I have a feeling that this story is about to end in about 2 or 3 chapters unless that is you plan to make another twist in the story.
Keep it up! I really love the story and can't wait to see what happens next. Update fast!