Huh. So the mysterious timeline changes to the Amazon village didn't fully derail things there... Whatever they were, when mentioned last chapter.

Ending just a tiny bit rushed, but still awesome

There are some definite sentence structure and grammar issues throughout, the dialogue needs a little bit of work here and there, and the truck incident was a bit contrived considering the level of strength and training he should have even at this point. Interesting concept, but overall I have to say not my cup of tea. Though I hope others enjoy the story.

Really interesting starting chapter, I don’t know much about Sailor Moon lol, but curious how things will develop.

Let me guess, Nodoka got them a strap on?

hi where can i get the PDF version? apparently there's embedded images init

hello

Mostly well written, but you're not Tolstoi.

...I just wanna read about the cool worldbuilding but the author keeps trying to make me read softcore porn...

I’d recommend maybe bumping up the rating to M, given the...pretty detailed description of them masturbating.

Interesting stuff. By portraying both series in a serious and realistic manner, you’ve taken away an inherent aspect that made the originals the originals, but you seem aware of that and willing to explore the freedom it gives you.

Still, never forget that a darker, realistic take on something light-hearted is a double-edged sword. Sure, it lets us examine something familiar in a new light, but by doing so, the creator risks losing something vital to the original.

I’ve seen far too many fanfic authors fall into that trap, moving so far from the tone of the source material that they lost the thing that drew us into these worlds in the first place.

This may seem mostly negative, but really, this is good stuff, I really enjoy it. Just...never forget your roots, ok?

(Oh, also I kinda feel like you could stand to tone down the horny stuff a bit. This isn’t so much an actual critique as it is just my opinion, but some of this was...a little uncomfortable to read.)

That was a very fascinating story!

I have always felt that the Chinese Amazons had too much pride and no common sense or respect for others.

Even the weapons of World War One would slaughter them, starting with Mustard Gas and ending with the machine gun.

The Kiss Of Death is nothing less than MURDER.

Why no one has exterminated them is a mystery.

RANMA WINS

There are several things that define Ranma.

Martial Arts, change this and you might as well rewrite your fic changing Ranma to Sam.
Genma the greedy and stupid, I have not ever read of a good Genma.
The curse, be careful changing this, also lock it at your peril, curing it is a BAD IDEA
The collection of girls chasing Ranma, having multiple females around is central to Ranma's character.
One may catch him, two is best, yes a triad not a couple.
The various girls and women do not have to all want to bed him.
Mother, wife, sister, cousin, Aunt, friend, student, teacher, etc, the females surrounding Ranma can be varied.
Ranma does not lose in the end, not when it counts.
The "Win" Ranma achieves might not be a traditional win.
Best shown in a fic where Ranma beats Hild by becoming her daughter!
There are other things defining a Ranma, this list is not complete.

If you change a character so much you can replace the characters name with Sam in your story(and it reads ok) then you have changed too much.

So far you are doing great.

People like Ryoga?

I guess they are also losers who blame others for everything.

With the way Ryoga acts he could be a bastard son of Genma.