Reviews for Five Breaks Along the Line
mendibends chapter 1 . 2/6/2014
really nice ending. I like how subtle their friendship was. great oneshot! this ones going in my favs
miikka-xx chapter 1 . 1/1/2010
Gorgeous. Love how it was written.

I love how, even vague, it's clear enough how each feel.

Nice twist on killing off Kiba. I like Kiba, but it was a great catalyst for Hinata's change.

Amazing little fic. :)
silt chapter 1 . 8/22/2009
this is really good, thanks for sharing!
nwyd chapter 1 . 6/2/2009
sequel? please? i liked it so much. 3 :)
White Jade chapter 1 . 12/25/2008
This is a sad story but what I don't get is the last part is does Sasuke or Hinata die or do they both die

Keep writing :-
TheBrokenQuill chapter 1 . 10/27/2008
Beautifully written.
Morgana-chan chapter 1 . 8/21/2008
this is more like a kibahina then a sasuhina but still good
Haruka2007 chapter 1 . 7/19/2008
interesting story (oneshot) but it feels unfinished :S

plz continue :D
shnickers chapter 1 . 6/27/2008
Fantastic!

I don't know about other people, but I still like getting pulled in simply by the title of the story itself. You have the greatest titles. Ever.

And plot is great and wonderful and all, but I actually liked the vagueness of time and space. It makes for more imagination. Though I really do have to wonder: what is it that SasuHina writers have against Kiba? He's always dying, getting rejected, etc in their stories... Makes me feel sad.

Sasuke and Hinata's strange friendship was pretty believable because while Hinata, like any other person in love, is willing to look past the faults of the person she loves, she was willing to face the truth with Sasuke. Sure, he's a messed up bastard. A product of a 'bad' household. It just makes it worse when they show you scenes of him pre-massacre, all cute and adorable, and then his crazy self afterwards.

...Anyways, I'm getting off topic. I really liked the five breaks: I like things sectioned off all nicely and orderly. And I really love themes and motifs. I also liked Hinata as a different person. I think that even sweet, vulnerable Hinata would harden given the necessary prodding...heh, I suppose that's why you offed Kiba. Though it was kind of arrogant of Sasuke to assume that everyone else would stay the same while only he could become cold and emotionless.

And what I really loved? The ending. All abrupt, and cut-off, and cliffhangy. No, I'm serious: I did like the vagueness. Because in life, not everything is so crystal clear. And probably she didn't live past that blast; perhaps Sasuke's way of ending the war was killing off everyone of importance, himself included.

Anyways, good luck on future endeavours! I will be looking forward to more from you~~!
Teruame chapter 1 . 6/23/2008
Dang...I really didn't expect something like this to show up, but it looks like I should start finding it good to be surprised. :)

Anyways, the idea of Hinata as Sasuke's once-first friend places this exactly where it should be. THIS is how it could be if Hinata gives up hope on Mr. Avenger early on. This is exactly how things would have turned out. And, I should praise you for the use of words here. Pretty! :)

Keep it up! You are a beacon of hope for SasuHina fans out there!
Guest chapter 1 . 6/12/2008
Awesome... Dark, dramatic, emotional and best of all: WELL WRITTEN! Nice work.
You Light The Sky chapter 1 . 6/12/2008
Whoa... talently written... handled very well.. You can see Sasuke's confusion and he is a great enigma... you see that Hinata and Sasuke care for each other as friends... and I like how sasuke said maybe they'd meet agian in a nother life.
reeroy chapter 1 . 6/8/2008
There's something about the mood of this one-shot that makes my breath catch. The suspense and darker theme makes it so enjoyable. You hardly find something as good as this, nowadays.

I say write 'Another Life'. I'm sure you'd wow me again.

:D
wasabi-raven chapter 1 . 6/8/2008
This is good story telling. Every break, every small fissure leading to that final insurmountable chasm between them was completely plausible. The characterization was spot on. I was slightly let down by the "and then?" ending (I thought it weakened what was a moving final conversation between them, but perhaps it's just me), but highly pleased with the story overall. Keep up the good work.
Madam Grey chapter 1 . 6/5/2008
This was amazing! It's written beauitfully and I loved how you handled their relationship, and how each break would tie in with one another. The usage of Kiba's death to further distance them made for a interesting touch. Not to mention the inclusion of some of the recent events in certain chapters ;) You characterize Hinata and Sasuke so well... I'm very, and pleasantly impressed. I loved this fic, definitly an instant fav 8D

- L
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